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If you currently struggle to have vaginal orgasms, then you’re in the right place. This chapter of the Orgasm Guide is going to show you the exact steps you need to take to start experiencing vaginal orgasms during sex and on your own.
Almost every woman can have a vaginal orgasm. All you need is the right technique and the ability to remove the mental obstacles that get in your way and prevent you from climaxing vaginally.
Orgasm troubles? If you are currently struggling to orgasm during sex or masturbation, then you may want to learn about the Easy Orgasm Solution. It will teach you how to have multiple vaginal and full body orgasms during sex and masturbation. It works even if you currently struggle to orgasm during sex or when masturbating. You can find out more here.
I’ve split this chapter into two sections:
The first section is a quick refresher on your anatomy, the science behind vaginal orgasms and why vaginal orgasms differ from clitoral orgasms. Think of this first section as the groundwork. It’s vital information that will make achieving a vaginal orgasm much easier.
The second section is all about the techniques.
Let’s jump into the first section
Vaginal & Clitoral Orgasms
Hopefully, you already know this, but in case you don’t, clitoral orgasms come from clitoral stimulation on the outside of the vagina, while vaginal orgasms come internal stimulation from your man’s penis, a dildo, fingers, etc. Many people believe the G-spot inside your vagina, but it may not be a separate entity [1] and may even be from stimulation of the rest of your clitoris that rests beneath the surface [2].
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Clitoral orgasms tend to be more common during intercourse, and less than half of women have regular vaginal orgasms during intercourse. Of the women who report having vaginal orgasms, many find them to be much more intense and satisfying than clitoral orgasms.
The Right Spot
Having a vaginal orgasm is slightly different for every woman.
1. Some women can have one from general stimulation throughout their vagina from their man’s penis. They don’t need their man to hit a particular spot. If you’re a man trying to make your partner orgasm, make sure to ask her! More advice about making her orgasm.
2. Others need intense stimulation on their G Spot on the anterior wall if they want a vaginal orgasm [3]. Although some people don’t believe in a distinct anatomical structure known as the G-spot [4], we firmly do. It’s located about 2 inches inside your vagina on the anterior wall, but it can be difficult to find. If you want a more detailed guide on how to find it, then read this in-depth report.
3. Some women need intense stimulation on their A Spot (this spot also has other names such as the Deep Spot, the anterior fornix erogenous zone or the AFE). This is on the anterior wall of your vagina just like your G Spot but is deeper. You can see its location below.
However, you might find other spots to be pleasurable as sensitivity in the vagina varies.
Finding out what kind of stimulation you need for a vaginal orgasm depends on your body and preferences. So, you’re going to need to do a bit of experimentation to discover what feels best.
Mental Blocks To Vaginal Orgasms
Question: Are you already close to having a vaginal orgasm during sex with your man? Do you feel that you are at the absolute edge, but you just need a tiny nudge to get over the edge and climax vaginally?
Quick Quiz: Do You Give Good Blow Jobs?
If you are new here, then you may want to take the quiz below to learn how good you are at giving oral sex and satisfying your man. You may discover you that you suck (pun intended) or that you are already a blow job queen.
If you answered yes and do regularly get close to orgasming vaginally during sex, then you can probably skip straight to the vaginal orgasm techniques, by clicking here. However, if you currently struggle and get almost no vaginal pleasure during sex or don’t get even a little bit close orgasm, then keep reading.
Almost all women who struggle to have vaginal orgasms share the same problem. They have certain mental blocks and restraints that prevent them from fully relaxing and letting go. These blocks include things like:
- Stress
- Trying to “force” the orgasm
- Being distressed about not being able to orgasm [5]. It’s a vicious cycle
- Performance anxiety
- Negative past experiences
- Anxiety about whether they have a normal vagina or if it’s different
These things seem obvious, right?
Of course, it’s hard to get aroused when you’re stressed and have an impending deadline at work that is worrying you as I explain in the the guide on how to increase your libido.
Putting pressure on yourself to orgasm is obviously going to work against you and make it harder to cum.
Having past negative experiences like an abusive boyfriend who only cared about his own pleasure can make it difficult for you to focus on your own sexual gratification in new relationships.
Having a vaginal orgasm will become far easier if you can get yourself into a relaxed state of mind, unencumbered by stress or worry or performance anxiety.
Now, instead of devoting this entire article to mental obstacles, I have created a guide that will teach you strategies to overcome these blocks so that you can more easily orgasm. Read it here.
Once you’ve identified and overcome potential mental blocks and obstacles, then it’s time to learn the actual techniques that will push you over the edge into orgasmic bliss…
Journey For One
As I advise in the first chapter of the Orgasm Guide, it’s going to be much easier to try to have a vaginal orgasm by yourself first before trying it with your man as you’ll feel less pressure.
Start by using a penis shaped dildo to mimic your man, otherwise use a regular dildo or just your fingers (if they’re long enough).
Once you penetrate yourself, it’s then a case of finding the most pleasurable spots on your vagina to stimulate. As I said earlier, for most people, this is going to be either your G Spot or Deep Spot.
You just need to maneuver your dildo into place so that you can start stimulating that spot. Then it’s a case of experimenting with the below techniques by yourself, before trying them out with your man.
Vaginal Orgasm Techniques
1. Angle/Position
You then need to think about the most satisfying angle or position of penetration whether you are using a dildo or having sex. Is your dildo pointing upwards, downwards or slightly into the side of your vagina? Is it parallel? Once you figure this out, you can then replicate this angle with your man during sex.
And if you need help finding a position that mimics the angle you enjoy most, then you will find over 100 different sex positions that you can try out here.
2. How Deep?
There is a silly myth floating around that deeper is always better. This is certainly true for some women [6] [7], but NOT for all. The G Spot is between two and three inches deep in your vagina, so if you need G Spot stimulation to bring you over the edge, then you may not need particularly deep penetration at all.
However, there is also an area much deeper in your vagina called the A Spot. Some women have intense, full body orgasms when this part of their vagina is stimulated. Obviously if you prefer having your A Spot stimulated during sex, then you’re going to prefer deeper penetration from your man.
3. Fast Or Slow?
Another myth that perpetuates is that faster is always better. You probably already know how untrue this is. A more accurate description is that the RIGHT RHYTHM is best. Finding a fast, slow or medium paced rhythm is a critical part of having vaginal orgasms.
You’ll also find that a steady rhythm is much more preferable than stopping and starting or going from fast to slow or vice-versa.
4. Rough Or Gentle?
Another personal preference is how hard you like it. Do you like gently making love with your man with soft, loving strokes or do you prefer more animalistic, intense, wild sex where he is penetrating you with everything he’s got?
Most people enjoy both, depending on their mood. After a wild night out, intense sex can be a lot more fun. But, if you’ve just had an emotional, heart-to-heart conversation with your man, then more loving and intimate sex will probably feel more appropriate.
5. Size
There is no other way to put this: Penis size does matter to women when it comes to having vaginal orgasms. If your man is too short or does not have enough girth, then he won’t be able to stimulate you as intensely. However, if he is too big then he is going to feel very uncomfortable inside you and sex can feel painful instead of pleasurable. The same problem arises if your man is too long.
For a significant amount of women, the ideal penis size is average or a little above average[8], provided it is attached to a man that knows what he is doing and is willing to listen to your feedback.
However, some women prefer penises on the larger side, while other women prefer them on the smaller side. It all comes down to your personal preference.
6. That Magic Touch
Not many people consider this technique. It’s all about your man applying constant pressure to a particular spot in your vagina with his penis. To perform the Magic Touch, he needs to penetrate you so that the tip of his penis is pressing against a particular spot and then just hold himself in place, keeping constant pressure applied.
A good spot for him to hit with the tip of his penis during the Magic Touch is your A Spot when he is deep inside you.
Many women report that the Magic Touch feels fantastic, while some don’t get much pleasure from it at all.
There are also many other techniques that you or your man can perform with your fingers and hands or adapt them for use during sex or with a dildo. Theses include techniques like the Hook, Push The Button, Come Hither and the Arm Shaker that I describe here.
7. The Right Position
It goes without saying that the right position during sex is vital for orgasming vaginally. Like with the techniques I describe above, the only way to find the right position for you to have a vaginal orgasm is by testing out many different positions and seeing what works.
Luckily I’ve got you covered; you can find over 100 different positions with demonstrations here.
The Last Word
The final thing to say on achieving vaginal orgasms with your man is that you need to talk to him. As cheesy as it may sound, communication is key [9]. When you can share tips with each other on what you both enjoy, you will quickly get in sync and find having vaginal orgasms to be easier and easier.
This was really informative. I thought I was well educated about sex and sexuality however I have never heard of the A spot and yet that is exactly what it takes for me to have a vaginal orgasm combined with the magic touch it is pure heaven.
Glad we could help!
Sean’s tips on a spot .g spot or either up down left/right has allowed me and my wife total orgasmic bliss every time now and yes it’s the a spot that gets me to orgasm once I feel her come over my tip .wee achieve pleasure every time now and wee both understand each others actions to achieve orgasms . I thank you for your tips and advice .
I feel so dumb every time I have the chance with no disruptions I blow it by focusing to hard and than not feeling it no more you know
This was so helpful and informative! Thank you! I’ve never been able to climax without direct clit stimulation. And never had just a vaginal orgasm. My husband left for work this morning and told me to leave my clit for him tonite so I was sure not to touch it and wanted to try out what I learned on your tutorial, so I followed the directions exactly, finding my g spot after getting aroused reading some erotica. I first just tried the pressure but felt very little but then I used some circular ebbing and I went wild squealing with delight as I squirted a large puddle on the sheets! First time success! Thanks Sean! Your amazing!
Glad I could help 😉
Thanks for the article 🙂
I just wanted to add that putting a pillow under your back can also help, so the man is finding the right spot 😉
Thanks for the article – I’m always fed up to read articles “denying” vaginal orgasms – I’ve been lucky to enjoy them since I started having penetrative sex.
As a woman you need to tell your partner what works for you – for me it’s always positions where I’m on my back with penis/dildo hitting the A spot and finding a rhythm is important – meeting your partner’s.
Hi everyone!
Is 5 inches girth enough to stimulate her vagina so that she’ll experience a vaginal orgasm?
Thank you
Depends on the girl. Some girls can never orgasm vaginally during sex, others find it easy.
It’s not the size that achieves her to orgasm it’s the motion in the ocean .once a man understands where her A spot .G.spot. he can get her to orgasm easily .this can be achieved with a couple of inches of a finger so 5 inches of cock deffo can achieve orgasms .plus if the woman tells him n shows him where to place his penis then orgadm heaven awaits you both goodluck
My man ask for oral sex alot while I have braces. I do it sometimes I feel like I’m going to cut him . Any tips.
Wrap your lips over your teeth
I had never experienced a vaginal orgasm before sex with my husband. For me it’s the A spot during “doggie style” that gets me. I never realized what all that pressure and then almost painful pleasure and feeling like I need to go pee was leading up to. I described it to my husband and together we figured out that with a little patience on my end and deep penetration from my husband, I began having a vaginal orgasm. For me, it’s completely different than a clitoral orgasm, which is why I didn’t recognize it as an orgasm. I’ve been married for 13 years and last year we began to open up about things we wanted to try, things that didn’t feel that great, just complete honesty without fear of rejection from talking about things that may be taboo. It’s done wonders for our sexual relationship but especially improved our emotional connection.
Didn’t you have a book on this
I’m working on it!
There are a couple of things that you did not mention. First, above all else, most women need around 30 minutes of concentrated and deliberate mental and physical stimulation to be fully aroused and have all their erectile tissue, including the Skene’s gland under the G-spot and the perineal sponge as well as the vestibular bulbs engorged, to make sex feel good and to be fully primed for having any sort of deep or full body orgasm. There is a physiological reason women’s erectile tissue does not respond as quickly as men’s. Men’s erectile tissue has cells that close up and hold blood where the valves close in synchronization. Women’s erectile tissue does not work like that and every cell in all their erectile tissues opens and closes independently. That right. A woman can have her clit engorged, but her Skene’s gland under her G-spot may still be flaccid.
Sorry ladies, but this also means you have to really get yourself in the mood when you touch yourself alone too, to reach your big O potential. But it’s so worth it.
Secondly, my G-spot moves depending on how turned on I am, because my Skene’s gland can really swell, and when it swells, literally touching the back wall, my G-spot moves closer to my vaginal opening.
And I just learned this: The Cervix also plays a huge role in deep penetrative orgasms for women.
I am one of those 30 some-odd percent of all women who has always been able to orgasm from penetration alone. My A-spot has always been my favorite (now I know probably my cervix too), especially with missionary position, mine and my husband’s favorite (and I know this sounds boring and vanilla, but there is an intimacy level we love about missionary that we can’t seem to get another way). But I am about 7 years into perimenopause (I am 53) and I can no longer have penetrative orgasms. It’s like they started becoming less frequent and a couple of years ago and now they have stopped all together. No one can seem to tell me if aging is part of the problem, tissue loss, muscle loss, collagen loss or what the problem is. Perhaps it’s mental, I don’t know? But it breaks my heart to think I will never orgasm again from my husband’s penetration. It’s really upset us both (him mostly because I am distraught about it and he does not like me to be upset). He never ever pressures me and is very reassuring, but I miss it so much. We still find other ways to fully pleasure each other, but it’s not the same. Any idea Sean? I would give almost anything to get my penetrative orgasm ability back.
Thanks for sharing Dee. Have you talked to your doctor about this?
What should be the size to reach a spot mine is like 6 inches approx
Hi Sean. Do men prefer a really super tight pusy or more of a looser pussy? I just recently found out after 17 years of no penetration (young widow who decided not to be partnered up) well… my vagina has practically closed up to the size of a marble, i have been using a estrogen cream inside the vagina per my doctors order to help take away all pain and to help bring back the moisture lubing again thats needed when the time comes for me to have sex again with a man. My pusy will be realy tight, will this being so tight will it hurt him or will it be very pleasant for him, i worry about friction also and dont want him hurt in that way, if thats even posiable ? I am excited about my new super tight pusy, and i hope my future guy will be too. My sister is now envious of me, she says hers is too loose!
It’s just like losing your virginity all over again. And that’s exactly what a lot of guys look for, someone’s virginity to take…
Hey Sean, my girlfriend has only ever really been able to come from sex in the Doggy style position. Not that I don’t go down on her or finger her but she just doesn’t seem to be able tohave clitoral orgasms. Could that mean she has a more sensitive G spot or A spot? And what things do you recommend to make her come more while stimulating those spots?
Don’t get too worried if she orgasms one way and not the other. Every body is built differently. You can check out guide on clitoral stimulation to learn how to stimulate her clit during sex.
it is absolutely not true that all women have a certain amount of time required to get going.
i can give myself a clitoral orgasm within 5 minutes of starting, almost every time. and a penetrative orgasm within that same amount of time, frequently.
also, sometimes i can basically start cumming almost immediately when i begin trying for it.
so, although i know many women need a good, long warm up…definitely, we all do not.
and even tho i do not need that, sometimes i don’t even need any at all. and when i’m like that, it’s basically nonstop orgasms until i can’t take it anymore. which is always good for my man.
admittedly, occasionally i may need a few extra minutes or effort. but that is my abnormal, my normal is a fast warmup and explosive good times soon after.
not trying to be argumentative or dismissive. but we are all different. our bodies are all different. and our needs are all different. we cannot be put into one box of always this or always that. it just doesn’t work that way.
and as a woman who has lots of amazing orgasms, lots of ways, without having to move mountains to make it happen…i just want to make sure that people know that yes, we are out there too.
and we need to cum just as much as everyone else.
also, sadly, many of us don’t even realize the full extent of our capabilities until much exploration and research and years of missing out.
so, embrace your bodies, ladies and gents.
don’t be afraid to talk to your partner about these things and keep trying til you find your best orgasms (and theirs)!
I seriously cannot believe that there is not a sex toy that clips (like hands free) to your clitoris to stimulate while having sex, it is just unbelievable to me, and makes me think that no one cares about female stimulation,
google Dame Eva 😉
I get very very turned on by the sight and thought and touch of a woman’s beautiful sticky slimy drippy pussy cum.(Aka Grool). I was really hoping to learn how effectively Grool the most from my lady’s pussy EVERY TIME. It’s like I’m physically addicted to the stuff in every aspect feeling it tasting it playing with it watching it leak out and soak the panties leaving snail trails. Any tips to get her to groom the most daily. Thank u