This beginners guide on how to have anal sex is in-depth. You’re going to learn the difference between having deeply satisfying anal sex that gives you full body orgasms and having anal sex that is painful and messy.
First, I’m going to talk about some of the fundamental tips for having great anal sex, then we’re going to cover the actual anal sex techniques and positions you should be using during the act. If you want to skip straight to the anal sex techniques and positions section, click here. I have also created a separate guide here on how to full prepare your body for anal sex (hygiene, etc.).
Side note: If you are currently struggling to orgasm during sex or masturbation, then you may want to learn about the Easy Orgasm Solution. It will teach you how to have multiple vaginal and full body orgasms during sex and masturbation. It works even if you currently struggle to orgasm during sex or when masturbating. You can find out more here.
Anal Sex Podcast
Before we jump in, you may want listen to my anal sex podcast to learn some powerful anal sex tips for intense orgasms. You’ll disover 11 things you must do in order to make it wildly pleasurable, fun & satisfying and avoid any pain, embarrasment or mess.
Listen to more podcast episodes here
1. What You Need To Know About Anal Sex – The Pros And Cons Of Anal Sex
There are a bunch of really awesome things you’ll discover as you start learning how to have anal sex, but there are also a number of drawbacks that you should be aware of too. Let’s start with the pros:
Anal Sex Pros
A Different Type Of Orgasm – Many women have much more intense orgasms from anal sex. I can’t fully explain why this is. I do know that there are thousands or nerve endings in your anus, but there are even more in your vagina and clit. So if you currently struggle to orgasm from regular vaginal sex, then you may find anal sex to be way more pleasurable.
The Kinky Factor – Another very appealing aspect of anal sex is the “kinky factor” or the taboo of doing something that you “shouldn’t.” Breaking taboos can be a lot of fun and major turn on in itself. Many people don’t see it this way, but if you do, then it’s just one more reason to have anal sex with your man. Some people consider anal sex kinky an incorporate it into BDSM scenes.
The Replacement – Often, vaginal sex is out of the question. You may not want to have it if you are on your period. You may have a UTI that you don’t want to aggravate. You may even be sore from a previous session. This is when anal sex becomes the perfect back up plan.
No risk of pregnancy – This one is obvious, but anal sex means that there is almost zero chance of pregnancy.
Anal Sex Cons
Needs Planning – One of the biggest problems with having anal sex is that it requires some planning. You probably don’t want to try anal after a big vegan lunch.
You are also going to want to do some preparation beforehand, especially if it’s your first time to make sure you’re clean and that it’s not painful. This guide will teach you everything you need to know about getting prepared for the act before you even try it with your man.
His Obsession – Some guys seem to have an obsession with anal sex, especially inexperienced guys. For many guys like this, it’s a box for them to tick and something they can brag to their friends about. If you are not particularly keen, but your man is obsessed, then dealing with this pressure can be a real turn off.
Some Love It, Some Don’t – Some women really adore anal sex. They find it incredibly pleasurable, while others don’t find it pleasurable at all. It comes down to personal preference, so if you try it and don’t enjoy it, that’s fine. There’s no need to stress about it if you don’t get much stimulation from it. Instead, try something else from the Bad Girls Bible.
2. Do You Even Want Anal Sex?
I wish I didn’t have to write this, but I do…
Many women aren’t interested in learning how to have anal sex. Instead, they’re just doing it to keep their man happy. In fact, they may be more than simply disinterested in the idea of anal sex, they may dislike and even hate the idea.
While I always recommend trying out new things at least once to see whether or not you like it, you should never feel forced to do anything you don’t want to do. The same goes for anal sex.
So, if you never want to try it or if you’ve tried it once and didn’t enjoy it, then the obvious but important anal sex tip I have for you is that you shouldn’t feel that you have to keep doing it with your man. If your sex life consists of you doing things that you don’t want to do, then it’s not going to be a particularly satisfying one. Like I mentioned previously, there are plenty more things you can do with your man.
3. Communication, Seriously
Learning how to have good anal sex requires great communication with your man. This is going to be mostly one way communication by the way.
You are going to be telling your man what to do AND what not to do.
So you need to be comfortable with the idea of telling your man:
- To slow down,
- To pull out slowly
- To completely stop moving.
Your man also needs to be someone who will actually follow your instructions too. If he thinks he is going to be in control and calling the shots, then you are going to have to bring him down to earth and let him know that this won’t be the case. Doing this isn’t so that you can “dominate” your man, it’s so that you get to experience the pleasures of anal sex AND NOT THE PAIN.
4. The Four Types Of Lube
One of the most important anal sex tips I have for you is on using lube: it’s almost always necessary for pain-free anal. However, not all lube is made equally, there are four types and choosing the right one plays a significant role in your pleasure.
Water Based Lube – As you can probably guess, water-based lube is made of mostly water. This makes it safe for anal sex, but it’s not perfect. The problem with water based lube is that it dries out quickly and then needs to be reapplied. Stopping to reapply lube can obviously ruin the vibe. You CAN use water based lubes with latex condoms as it does not degrade them. It’s also easy to wash out, especially if you’re having sex in water.
Silicone Based Lube – Silicone based lube is the lube we recommend you use when having anal sex. It’s compatible with latex condoms, so you won’t degrade them. It also lasts much longer than water-based lube, so you don’t have to worry about reapplying it either. It also feels super silky and smoother than many water-based lubricants. The only slight drawback is that it can sometimes be a little hard to wash out of your bedclothes.
Oil Based Lube – Oil based lube feels a little smoother and silkier than water-based lube. It also lasts for ages, so it’s perfect for anal sex, but there are some significant drawbacks. It’s much harder to wash out of linens. More importantly, oil-based lube degrades latex condoms making them tear and rip. Bottom line, if you don’t want the condom to tear during the act, then don’t use an oil-based lube.
Saliva – I decided to included saliva as often you may not have access to lube and need a backup, especially if you are having a quickie. It’s water based and so is compatible with latex condoms. It probably shouldn’t be your first choice because it will dry up and isn’t plentiful, but it works fine.
Here’s how we rank the different types of lube beginning with the most enjoyable and useful lube:
- Silicone based
- Water-based
- Oil based (if not using condoms)
- Saliva
When picking a lube from the shelf, you’ll see that some of them contain spermicide. The point of this ingredient is to kill sperm and prevent pregnancy, which has little risk with anal activity. However, most lube that is spermicidal has ingredients that are harsh on your sensitive genital and anal cavities [1] [2], and even lube without spermicide can damage cells [3]. This damage makes it easier to contract STIs such as HIV [4]. Avoid lube with spermicide for anal or any other sexual activity
Unfortunately, many popular lubes, both with and without spermicide, can damage the tissues in your rectum [5]. This is due to osmolality, a rating of particulates dissolved in solution. Every orifice or tissue in your body has its own osmolality, and the rating differs between your anus and vagina, so you might want different lubes for each activity.
Good Clean Love is a healthier option [6], and Yes But and Sliquid Sassy are designed to be safe especially for anal sex. You can also try Aloe Cadabra as slow-osmolality lube for anal sex.
5. Pain-Free Pleasure
This section is by far the most important part of the anal sex guide. Don’t skip it.
Many people report anal sex feeling painful and the reason for this is your anus. There is a ring of muscle in your anus called the sphincter that keeps it tightly closed [7]. This muscle is NOT like your bicep or hamstring muscles that you can quickly relax and contract in a split second.
Instead, it takes quite a while for it to relax and allow things to pass through it. Think of it as a very strong, but very slow muscle.
If you try to pass something through it quickly (your man’s penis) when it’s closed, then it won’t have enough time to relax, and this will cause a lot of pain.
So, the key to having pain free anal sex is getting your sphincter muscle to relax and open up enough so that your man can enter you with ease. Here’s how:
Start With A Lubed Finger – If you read the Anal Sex Preparation Guide here, you’ll know that it’s best to try penetrating yourself ALONE first with a finger covered in lube so that you get to see how your sphincter reacts to it. If you’ve already done this a few times and have a good idea of how long it takes to relax around your finger, then you can get your man to do the honors this time. If you haven’t done it by yourself yet, then I recommend that you try it alone first while following these instructions.
He needs to apply a bit lube to the tip of his finger and some more to your ass. Next he needs to slowly slide his finger inside you, millimeter-by-millimeter, while you give him feedback, telling his to go deeper or to stop moving or to SLOWLY pull out (pulling out fast can cause some pain, he needs to do it slowly).
As he slowly penetrates you deeper and deeper with his finger, it should feel reasonably comfortable.
If it becomes slightly uncomfortable, then tell him to stop moving and to keep his finger still for a minute or two. This will allow your sphincter to relax around his finger and open up. When the pain subsides, he can push a little deeper.
If it becomes too uncomfortable and painful, then tell him to pull his finger out slowly. Rest for a minute or two and then get him to start over.
Thrusting – When he can’t penetrate you any deeper with his finger, he needs to slowly thrust in and out. Again you should control the pace here, so tell to him either speed up or slow down, depending on what you want.
Double Up – Once you are comfortable with your man thrusting in and out, he needs to try adding a second finger. Again, he should be very slow and cautious doing this, following your instructions and feedback to either continue, slow down, stop or slowly pull out.
Once he can easily thrust in and out with his two fingers, then either try three fingers or you can start having anal sex.
Don’t Numb – You might be tempted to reach for a product that numbs your anus for anal sex. However, these products aren’t lubricants and prevent you from knowing what is happening with your body. When your anus is desensitized, you may not be able to tell when the pain is indicating the need to cease penetration [8].
6. He Should Start On His Back
The most comfortable position to start having anal sex is with your man on his back so that you are in control. This means that it’s a lot harder for him to thrust into you and it’s much easier for you to control how deep you take him and how fast he thrusts.
So get him to lie down on his back and ask him NOT to thrust into you. Instead, he should remain still.
After applying some lube to your man and your backside, you can then straddle him on your knees like in the Cowgirl position or even the Asian Cowgirl position.
Grab hold of his penis and then slowly guide it inside your anus. Make sure to take your time. As I mentioned above, if you feel uncomfortable or experience any type of pain stop and allow your sphincter muscle to relax around his cock. Once it has, then you can try taking him a little deeper.
When your man is completely inside you and can’t go any deeper, you can slowly raise your body up and dow.
The main thing here is to take things slowly. You don’t want to hurt yourself, so if you experience any discomfort at all, slow right down and even stop to allow yourself to relax. Meanwhile your man should stay lying down on his back, not thrusting.
Once you do feel comfortable moving up and down on your man, then he can start to get involved a little more by thrusting himself. Remember that you still need to be in control here. So if he gets too carried away, tell him to slow down or stop.
And that’s it!
This is the easiest and smoothest way to learn how to have pain free anal sex. But let’s not stop here…
It’s time to change gears and learn some advanced anal sex techniques so you can discover how to have deeply satisfying anal sex and enjoy body-shaking anal orgasms.
7. The Best Anal Sex Positions
Having anal sex in the Cowgirl or Asian Cowgirl positions is fine, but if they are the only positions that you use, then you are missing out on a lot of fun.
Stay On Top – Here are ten more positions where you are sitting down in your man’s lap that you can try during anal sex. You might also enjoy these 13 positions where you are on top of your man.
From Behind – Once you are comfortable with your man having more control and doing all the thrusting, then you may want to try out some doggystyle type positions, where your man is fucking you from behind. I’ve put together an entirely separate guide on the 19 best anal sex positions here where you are in the doggystyle position or a variation of it.
8. Advanced Anal Sex Techniques
Once you master the basics of anal sex, it’s time to switch gears and start experimenting with new and more pleasurable techniques to make your orgasms more intense and enjoyable.
Your Clit – During anal sex, your clit is not going to be stimulated as it’s almost impossible for your man to maneuver his body into a position that stimulates it with each stroke. With this in mind, here are a few alternative ways to stroke it.
- Your own hands – After all, you know what type of stimulation your clit responds to best! You may want to steal some of these 14 clitoral masturbation techniques and use them during anal. Alternatively you can finger yourself using these 8 powerful fingering techniques and tips.
- His hands – If your man is using one of these 19 anal sex positions, then all he needs to do is reach around and start rubbing and massaging your clit and vagina. He can even use the masturbation and fingering techniques I just mentioned.
- Vibrator – Using a vibrator is a super satisfying anal sex technique. You get to feel every inch of your man inside you while at the same time you get to feel the power of your vibrator on your clit. This can lead to some really intense orgasms. Here are 9 deeply satisfying ways to use your vibrator during sex.
Try Some Toys – Your man’s penis isn’t the only thing that can stimulate you anally. There are numerous toys you can use during vaginal sex that will give you incredible anal pleasure such as:
- Butt Plugs – These are tapered toys with a flared base that you insert anally and stay in place. If you like the feeling of ‘fullness,’ then you will enjoy using a butt plug during sex. Most sex shops also sell vibrating butt plugs. Read our guide on using butt plugs for better sex.
- Anal Beads – These consist of connected round beads, almost like a necklace that you insert into your anus and then pull out. Many people find that pulling the beads out during orgasm enhances it.
- Lube Launchers – These resemble syringes and are used to get lube inside your anus before anal sex so that your man’s penis or your toys slide in easier.
Double Penetration – If straightforward anal sex isn’t enough for you, then you should try double penetration where you are being penetrated both anally and vaginally at the same time.
If you don’t like the idea (and loss of control) that comes with having two men at the same time, then using a dildo in your vagina while your man penetrates you anally is the perfect substitute. Learn how to use a dildo for maximum pleasure here.
When Alcohol Can Help – I don’t generally recommend mixing alcohol and anal sex, but if you are nervous or anxious beforehand, then drinking one glass of wine or one beer beforehand can do wonders at alleviating those nerves.
Anal Training – Many women adore having anal sex and experience powerful orgasms from it while others find it too uncomfortable to orgasm and enjoy it. The reason for this pain and discomfort is simple.
If you rarely have anal sex, your sphincter never gets used to relaxing for your man’s penis. This means that each time you have anal sex, it feels like the first time for your sphincter and it never learns to relax fully and open up.
The only way to overcome this is to have anal sex regularly. This way your sphincter will get used to being full and relaxing around your man. If you don’t get a chance for regular anal sex, then my advice is to try using a dildo with a flared base (so that it doesn’t get sucked inside you) or use a butt plug when masturbating to train yourself anally.
9. Anal Sex Sweet Spot
Once you have tried anal sex with your man a few times, you’ll start to notice that your sphincter relaxes more rapidly and that having anal sex becomes more and more enjoyable for you.
When this starts happening, then you need to start doing some experimentation so that you learn how to get maximum pleasure from anal. The easiest way is to try new positions.
As well as trying new positions, you need to try some of the following things:
- Experiment with short, shallow strokes as well as long, deep, penetrating strokes to see what you prefer. Most couples find that they actually love alternating between both.
- Experiment with different angles. Does a particular angle feel better than the rest? Do a little experimentation to see what you prefer.
- A great anal sex tip is adding in a little dominance and submission play. You may find that anal sex is way hotter when your man is dominating you or vice-versa.
10. Anal Sex Safety
Anal sex can be a huge amount of fun, but there are a few safety considerations to take into account. I know this may sound like one of my less interesting anal sex tips, but safe sex is no joke.
Condoms – Unprotected anal sex is considered a high-risk activity for spreading sexually-transmitted infections (STIs) and disease [9], more so than vaginal sex [10], because the anus is more delicate that the vagina [11]. In fact, the CDC considers anal sex the riskiest sexual activity for transmitting HIV [12], especially as the receiver is more likely to contract HIV than the giver [13].
Other STIs that you can get from anal sex include:
- Chlamydia [14]
- Genital herpes
- Genital warts
- Gonorrhoea
- Syphilis
- Hepatitis B [15]
- HPV, which can present as anal warts [16]
Not only can pass infections to you, but you can pass them to him (HIV can be transmitted through rectal fluid [17] [18]), so I strongly advise that you wear condoms during anal sex. Some people go as far as to say you can never have 100% safe anal sex without one [19].
Your partners might be hesitant to use condoms during anal sex because there isn’t a pregnancy risk (and people use condoms more often for vaginal than anal sex when asked about their last intercourse experience [20]). But safety should be a priority when it comes to sex.
You can use female condoms during anal sex, but some of them are more likely to slip or cause bleeding [20].
As I mentioned earlier, you should NEVER use oil-based lube with latex condoms. Doing so will degrade the material leading to tears and breakage [21] [22] [23]. Stick to silicone and water based lubes.
If you prefer marathon sex sessions, you may want to use new condoms more frequently than with vaginal sex.
Don’t Double Dip – Switching from anal sex to vaginal sex without changing condoms and thoroughly cleaning his penis is going to lead to an infection known as bacterial vaginosis [25]. It’s also important to not that anal intercourse among women who have sex with women is associate with a higher likelihood of them having bacterial vaginosis [26]. I think it goes without saying that fecal matter in your vagina is a bad idea.
The same applies to oral sex. If you want to switch from anal to giving him a blow job, you need to thoroughly clean his penis first otherwise you risk infection. By the way, if you want to learn how to give your man the most intense blow job of his life, then you should read through the Blow Job Guide here.
Toys – The above advice also applies to using sex toys anally. Using a dildo/vibrator/butt plug anally and then switching to some vaginal penetration is going to require a thorough clean first.
A quick way to do this is to cover the toy with a condom completely and tie the end to create a seal around the toy. Then when you are finished using it anally, carefully take the condom off and replace it with a fresh condom. Then you can safely use it vaginally.
Although fecal incontinence is one [27] and anal cancer is another [28] risk of anal sex, following safety precautions minimizes risks for side effects of anal sex.
11. Communication & Feedback
I am always surprised at how couples often don’t talk about their sex life with each other.
A lot of guys don’t understand the potential for pain or that you need to allow a few minutes for your sphincter to relax. Many couples talk about these kinds of things indirectly and never fully express their wants and needs.
Being indirect is not a huge problem, but often giving each other more specific feedback would be much more helpful.
If there are certain aspects of having anal sex that you don’t enjoy, make sure your man knows. Instead of saying, “It was ok” be more specific.
“I need more time to relax around your penis” or “Your penis was a bit too big for my first time, so it felt quite painful” or “Next time, I’d appreciate if you don’t thrust at all and let me control the rhythm”
Make sure to ask for his feedback too. As you both figure out what went wrong AND what went right, you can both change things up so that it becomes more and more pleasurable over time. I’m talking about positions, who’s in control, how fast or deep your man thrusts and what other techniques he uses.
This advice isn’t just for anal sex by the way. You should apply it to your every aspect of your sex life. This way you can both discover how to keep satisfying each other.
On the subject of better communication and giving each other feedback, you may realize that you absolutely hate anal sex. Keeping quiet about it is not a splendid idea. Instead, you should let your man know in a straightforward, non-judgmental, non-confrontational way how you feel about it. The same goes if you adore it, make sure to let him know!
12. Anal Sex For Guys
Women aren’t the only ones who can orgasm from anal sex, many guys can too. Men have a gland inside their butt called the prostate gland that is highly sensitive and many guys find it incredibly pleasurable to have stimulated. Girls don’t have a prostate gland.
So, if you and your man are open minded, then you may be interested in penetrating him with a strapon. Penetrating your man anally with a strap on is called pegging and it’s very much like anal sex for you, some guys love it, while others aren’t so interested. It also means that all of the advice above applies to pegging your man with a strapon.
If you are interested in learning more about pegging your man with a strapon, then make sure to check out our pegging guide.
Of course, if you want to give your man some anal stimulation, you don’t have to go straight to pegging him. There are other ways to do it. He can try inserting a butt plug. Or if you like, you can insert a lubed finger in his ass during sex or during a hand job (hand job tips here) or a blow job (blow job tips here).
13. Anal Sex FAQ
We’ve tried to make this anal sex guide exhaustive, but you may have more questions. So we’ve answered the most common anal sex questions:
Do women enjoy anal sex? A 1,260 woman study
How can I prepare myself for anal sex?
What are some good anal sex positions?
How do I give my man a prostate massage?
Can I have anal sex while I’m pregnant?
Can I get pregnant from anal sex? – Short answer: It’s unlikely
What is a butt plug and how can I use it for more pleasure?
14. Now What?
Now that you know how to have anal sex with your man that is both satisfying and fun, my suggestion is that you read the next chapter in the Anal Sex Guide on how to prepare for anal sex. After that, make sure to check out the best anal sex positions and then learn how to eat ass (it can be very pleasurable and super kinky). And if your man is keen on anal play, then make sure you learn how to give him a prostate massage.
Orgasm Every Time. Easily. Here’s How...
I want to tell you about my friend Karen.
Karen came to me one day. She was hysterical.
She told me that her marriage was falling apart because she and her husband didn’t have satisfying sex.
Every time they were intimate, Karen was faking her orgasms. It turns out she couldn’t orgasm during sex.
In fact...
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This left her feeling embarrassed and ashamed. And...
She completely hid this from her husband. Thankfully...
It turns out that there is a way for any woman to orgasm. Easily. And have multiple vaginal and full body orgasms during sex and masturbation.
I shared the process with Karen.
After she followed the simple process, she could barely come to terms with how...
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We met up a few months later and...
She would not stop talking about it,
“I thought I was one of those women who couldn’t orgasm. I used to think I was ‘broken’ and ‘unfixable.’ This saved my sex life, and that saved my marriage.”
Even if you currently struggle to orgasm during sex or when masturbating, this process will also work for you.
And best of all, you don’t need to do anything weird or uncomfortable to start having the best orgasms and sex of your life.
David Grubbs, RN says
YOU CAN GET PREGNANT FROM ANAL SEX!!!
Ok, just hear me out… because I don’t want anyone thinking this is 100% birth control. No, your rectum does not connect you anything to cause pregnancy. Think about it like masturbating onto your partner’s vulva (the lips and stuff on the outside), this is because there is a SMALL chance that the little swimmers could swim all the way home. This is not very common, but it is possible.
So when you have vaginal sex, and the man cums then (most of the time) pulls out. What happens then? (not sure how graphic I can be here…) Some of the semen comes back out and gets on the sheets, your panties, down your leg… you get the picture. Ever noticed that if stay still on your back or it comes out pretty quickly, that it runs down you to the bed… passing near / over / maybe even slightly in the anus.
Now flip that over… You had anal sex. In my experience it comes back out pretty quick as I pull out. So where does it go? Straight down via gravity to the sheets… so similar to the above, it (quicker than you think) can come out and slide down to your vaginal opening. How close are the two? If you don’t already know, (CLEANLY WITHOUT TOUCHING EACH OTHER) slide a finger in each hole at the same time. What would you say, MAYBE a 1/4″ on average? GUYS Note: Gently squeezing this area with your thumb and finger can cause pleasure for her and works great during oral. 🙂
So depending on the amount of semen, umm.. how “open” it is either from earlier sex or just being able to very easily take almost any man (was that a politically correct way to say that? lol), how you wipe (STILL FRONT TO BACK), or if you get dressed quick and it all spills into your panties and then your “lady parts” are rubbing all in it as you move and walk. It is possible for enough semen to get in the vagina to result in pregnancy.
As you can see, while not real common, but it is possible through “splash conception”. A quick survey of about 10 Google “hits” is where I get that number. 8% failure rate.
A COUPLE OF ANAL SEX TIPS:
1. You can go from vaginal sex straight to anal. BUT DO NOT GO FROM ANAL SEX STRAIGHT TO VAGINAL SEX!!! It makes for an unpleasant experience, as infections are very common.
2. If “cleanliness” is a concern, when I first started I preferred to wear a condom for anal to be “cleaner” not for birth control. This can actually decrease friction and make insertion easier and a little less uncomfortable the first couple times. (Use non-ribbed or texture free condoms.)
3. Once you are both used to it, I find that often her lubrication coming out from vaginal sex and all over my penis when I pull out is all I need for anal penetration. (Tried the first time after 5-6 regular anal encounters.) Just warn her before you switch, or make sure you know her body enough before you try this without a warning. Depending on gravity and how excited she stays, I often find that she stays almost as wet in the back as the front… but she REALLY likes it as she can have multiples “back to back” in either entrance!!! Before we met, she was 35, she had tried anal once and hated it, and had only had 6 orgasms total during intercourse in her life, now she has 6 in a row or more just during the anal part of things.
4. With that said, here is something she will LOVE!!! Note: this technique requires the ability to continue trusting through her orgasms without cumming yourself, but it can cause her orgasm to be longer, or even trigger her to have her first “back to back” multiple orgasms if she doesn’t already!!! Before trying this, you must know your partner, know she is ok with anal, and that it is relatively comfortable for her because it works best when she has NO IDEA it’s coming. HERE WE GO… Have sex in a position that allows you easy access to the area and the ability to grab your penis. I prefer her on her side with me straddling her lover leg. (btw, this position can give maximum penetration, so if she likes it then slam it hard, BUT if you are longer than she is, be careful because you can cause her severe pain. Even if you have never hurt her from penetration depth before, sometimes you will with this position.) Get her worked up by getting her close and backing off a couple times until she is ready to explode!!! Then as she begins to orgasm continue to fully thrust until she is well into her orgasm, then (preferably before she comes down from her current orgasm) as quickly as possible pull out of her, line it up and gently but quickly (again, know your partner) slide your penis inside her rectum and begin thrusting in whatever way she likes. I have NEVER have a complaint from this as it tends to hold that orgasm longer while throwing her into another, often stronger orgasm. Even if it takes a few seconds and the orgasm subsides, she will likely orgasm again very quickly. With this technique, I have been told many times that this caused the anal orgasm to be significantly more intense than the vaginal ones preceding it .
So… I hope that helps someone. If this thing lists how to contact me, you are welcome if I can help.
David
Sean Jameson says
Wow!
Thanks David, incredible post!
Sean
Joe says
Question: my girlfriend wants to try a butt plug as part of being submissive. Is there a time limit how long a butt plug may be used or a time limit. IE her going out to dinner with it in place?
Andy says
Yea that isn’t how it works bud. Even if you ejaculate onto her like you said there is 0 chance that the sperm will make it all the way to an egg. Sorry to burst your bubble
CPT Obvious says
Andy, yes, a girl can get pregnant from any activity that introduces semen to (even the outer edge of) the vagina. They are called ‘swimmers’ for a reason.
Jason says
Nice little post! A couple of things though, water based lubricant isn’t necessary. OIL based lubricants, like creams and such, can damage condoms but basically any silicone based lubricant that you can find at the stores these days are condom compatible. I personally prefer oil because it is SO much slicker than water based and doesn’t dry out.
I also find the easiest way to take it is to lay on your side, spooning style. Because you are laying down your whole body is relaxed and as the receiver you can still push back on your man. You are more tense in doggy because you are holding your body up.
Nice post though! I enjoyed it 🙂
play boy says
nice this is corract.
lolz says
even if all the safety measures is followed anal sex is still a very risky sex act
Sean Jameson says
How exactly?
David says
What risk are you talking about? This is an example of why saying “all, always, every”, etc… can make you look stupid. Especially since one form of “safety measure” is abstinence… and if you follow that one I’m REALLY having trouble spotting the risk!!! Not trying to sound like an A$$, but it sounds like the biggest thing you are at risk of is a mundane sex life.
Sure there is risk with any form of sexual contact… but at a point the risk becomes so minimal its basically non-existent. Ever heard the terms (am know the difference between) possibility and probability???
Please explain the risk if you follow ALL safety measures (off the top of my head here are just a few of them to consider): Condom, lots of lube to help prevent condom breakage (and most women I know don’t like dry anal), go slow until things are “ready”, used a toy to stretch things a little bit first, both partners got tested, did your best not to “contaminate” the vagina, were on birth control (in case the condom broke & it was that time of the month & the sperm spread to the vagina), immediately cleaned up, both washed hands immediately and took showers immediately afterwards, cleaned the sheets properly, etc… So if you do all of that, what “very risky” issues are we talking about???
I admit, I’m sure I missed something in my quick list there. Sure it is POSSIBLE that you could go to the local pool and swim in the water with a woman who just had unprotected anal sex and YOU (if you’re female) end up pregnant from it or there is a chance of either sex catching a disease… but let’s get real, what are the odds in that actually happening??? Sex is risky, it has been since before Christ was born. Refresh my memory, what is the “oldest profession”??? Ever since there were more than just Adam and Eve around, there has been a risk of catching a STD. (The new term STI was probable between just the two of them. Even with conventional sex, being safe, etc… it isn’t uncommon to get a UTI, yeast Infection, etc.. after having sex for several hours with a partner who you have been in a mutually monogamous relationship with for years.) {Note, that was not a religious comment… it was more sarcasm for those who don’t understand what BC actually means.}
I am safe, I get tested, and I’m picky about my partners, but I’m not giving up sex because it is “still a very risky sex act” “even if all the safety measures is followed”!!!
Claudine says
You are amazing! Wish all men were as knowledgeable and caring like you. Very hot ?
Amin says
Yes very hot
Allan says
I’ve just acquired a 53 year old girl friend. She’d not tried anal sex before, but I was initially very slow and gentle fingering her and rimming her. She was utterly relaxed, and kept murmuring how nice it was. This is on her first time!
So my middle finger goes deeper and deeper into her rear, and moves around inside and she loves it. So I think “Why not? She’s really relaxed and liking it” – so I add my forefinger and now she’s TWO fingers as deep as possible inside her anus on her first time – and still she’s saying how good it is! And there’s STILL no resistance….
So I withdraw and push in a well lubed but pretty big thick black vibrating polyurethane offset rotating dildo, which once it’s five inches in I switch on and it’s buzzing gently and (invisibly) twirling around offset inside her anus – and STILL it’s her first time and now she’s bloody mad for it. I get the vibrations and the whirling to maximum – she’s almost babbling with pleasure. All on her first anal date!!
I’m a lucky man to have such a woman as my lover. But the story is really to say that anal sex is horses for courses. She at NO time ever complained of pain or discomfort on her first trip down Sphincter Alley. I know I would have!! We went the full Monty next time and I got my cock really deep into her and man, she was just going wild! It was just slowness and patience and above all utter relaxation that gave her such an easy and joyous initiation. Take note.
Ole Jørgen Kjøhl says
Wow thats great! ?
Ella says
I think that person was referring to it being dangerous by unnatural orientation. The anus isn’t “meant” to be penetrated and sometimes it can cause injury, especially if the receiver doesn’t take proper hygienic precautions. As usual, first-timers are prone to bleeding just as they would with first-time vaginal sex. This leaves them vulnerable to more bacterial infection than they would be with vaginal sex.
I personally have just started experimenting with anal sex and from my experience, it sounds worse of a painful experience than it really is. My misconception about it, that I think a lot of other girls have too, is that the initial pain of… insertion… lasts through the entire insertion process, or in more blunt terms, that the pain you feel when a guy first inserts his penis “head” in lasts throughout the entire time he continues to push inward. This was not the case at all, for me at least. I’m not sure if that is what the term “rimming” is, but once my partner and I got past that initial step (which did take some practice and patience, as described in the article), it was smooth sailing.
It really is a new, fun experience if you and your sexual partner are ready to take the next step in being intimate with each other. I do agree that it is something that needs commitment especially since it can be quite painful at first I used to think it was dirty and unappealing, but if my opinion on this can be changed I am sire it can be for anyone else.
Gina says
Yes I do agree its painful and quite enjoyable but vaginal sex is best cause that’s where a penis meant to go but I try with two guys in in both entry’s oooh my god mind blow orgasms I screaming so much they didn’t get to blow in me lol what a shame need to do it again uh
Candy says
I am interested in anal stimulatIon for my boyfriend. He has penetrated me anally and has now expressed an interest in me stimulating him anally. Any tips on that subject?
Sean Jameson says
Hi Candy,
You just need to use the same techniques as he uses when having anal sex with you, although you will obviously need to use a strapon or butt plug in this case.
Sean
john says
my gf suprised me with sucking my cock soo good and b4 i knew wht happened she already had her vibrator buried n my ass n started sliding it n out my ass with it on the highest vibrating speed made it feel so good getting my ass fucked bby my gf and every since tht time she bought her a strap on (black mamba) and n instead of her only getting fucked now we take turns n i get fucked like her bitch n its sweet
Baba says
Yes it’s hote me too ilike my girlfriend fucking my ass with strapon it’s amazing
Rob says
Candy I recommend while you are sucking your man’s dick to work your way to his balls. As you lick his balls continue down and give his ass a quick swipe of the tongue. After you hear him moan you should put a finger in your mouth and get it good and wet and slowly start to press your finger into his ass. If you have licked his ass a few times he won’t even notice that you have your finger inside. Your finger will feel just like your tongue felt. Until you have more fingers in his ass than you have had in tongue. By then he will enjoy it so much that you will be fucking him with your toys. If you don’t eat ass you will need a vibrator to begin breaking him in.
nikki says
I love anal sex it so freeing
Colleen says
How do you make anal more comfortable when you have hemorroids?
Sean Jameson says
You should try get them cleared up. Talk to your doctor.
gonzalez says
my gf read this article, and yesterday i got fucked by strap-on…
Cherise says
For comfort in entering anally, it works to be really turned on before anal entry. Deep kissing, squeezing nipples, rubbing the vulva and having vaginal sex for a few minutes first really helps to relax the anal muscles. Using lots of lubricant, the penis can push slowly, and if there is any tightness at all, withdraw and wait until the woman feels ready to do it again. The second time again entering slowly will be more relaxed and ready. If the woman rubs her vulva hard as entry happens it will more likely be pleasurable . If not, withdraw and try again when ready. Certainly it helps to have a caring partner who you can trust to be gentle. Once you are warmed up you can go pretty hard and it’s likely to give you a really great orgasm, more than you get vaginally.
Stacey says
I’ve always enjoyed anal sex, it usually came doggy style. I haven’t dated in many years, but a male friend recently sent me a dildo, well, superb. He wanted to watch me, so I videoed everything for him. This was the first time I ever got into different positions for anal. Including laying on my side as mentioned previously. I just love anal, and when you’re doing for yourself, positions are key, I can get doggy style in but it strains my arms, the easiest, most comfortable, with less arm straining I’ve found for myself is to lie on back, knees to chest, spread or not. I love anal either way, and men who actually know what they are doing in bed are superb. I’ve recently got completely involved with a bodacious beautiful man I grew up with. WE haven’t had sex yet, I’ve been saving myself for my perfect man, the last man I’ll ever be with. He will enjoy me completely, my sexual appetite and desires have only increased over the years. Wow, it’ll be intensely awesome. I’ve noticed though, reading your bad girl bible, I was doing everything right from the beginning and I’ve learned so much as well. (Its been about 7 yrs now since I let a man touch me) And I’m ecstatic that I’m giving myself to my “Perfect Man”., and what I have in-store for him. WOW!!!
So a super thanks to you Sean and all them guys that actually made some really great and reinforcing comments about their experiences. I don’t understand why women aren’t more giving to their own men, no wonder stuff happens in relationships bc of sexuality.
Issi says
Go you! Sounds totally awesome.
I agree that my appetite has got stronger and I’m loving it all
The newsletters are also so informative.
Woo!
Renee says
When first trying anal I feel an intense pressure in my stomach. Is that normal?
Sean Jameson says
It’s not. It could be nervousness, but if it’s very painful, that your body telling you that something isn’t quite right. Listen to your body and talk to a doctor if it’s quite severe.
anonymous says
I know this is a rough subject to bring up, but i was raped through anal sex several years ago – it caused some physical damage inside me in addition to a temporary sickness.
However, now I’m dating someone that i love and trust, and i know he would like to explore anal sex with me. Once i told him my situation, thankfully he respected my initial boundary of not wanting to do that.
Now i wonder if i should try it with him, but I’m afraid it may be more difficult than trying to get the sphincter muscle to relax. Any ideas?
Sean Jameson says
This sounds like something you should talk to your doctor about. The last thing you want is for it to trigger any bad memories.
Honeybee says
I am curious if anal sex is okay during pregnancy? I am six months pregnant. My husband and I tried it once before and while it wasn’t painful, I didn’t find it pleasant either. I think if we took it slower and tried your tips I might enjoy it more. I just want to make sure that I am not doing anything I shouldn’t be during my pregnancy, or that pregnancy might somehow effect how it feels.
Jenny Fox says
The best thing you can do is talk to your doctor about it.
Kiwi says
I was fine, but I did it alone and actually for the first time, during pregnancy. I used toys just with myself. I haven’t had the same intensity of an orgasm ever again. I have two kids and I will never forget how I discovered that pleasure. I don’t know how to describe it, but it was mind blowing.
joses says
Anal sex has never been a pleasant thought to me…till last night my boyfriend and I decided to try it out. We had a few drinks together and had sex the usual entry whilst that, we were having so much fun that I insisted we try anal and of course like any other guy wouldn’t disagree, we did. WOW! It was amazing! I had 3 orgasms consecutively! Something i have never done before! What better way to enjoy your sex.
TEE
Katy says
I love anal sex! I was surprised the first time but I loved everything. I loved him rubbing my anus and sliding fingers inside me. We used a lot of lube and it took a few tries to get his penis all the way in but after he got it in and started thrusting it felt incredible. After he came and pulled out, I wanted it again.
Katherine Fish says
I am 7 months pregnant, I now find anal sex is far more comfortable if I lay on my side. My boy friend prefers it with me.
soapbox biddy says
I have found that the 1st few times anal sex is tried. It is best not to pull in & out at all, when you’re partner says it’s okay to start moving, go in circles with the love muscle or strap on. Use the circular motion everytime , your partner will go in & out when the pain finally goes away all the way. Especially if the partner is extra small like me. I’m medically documented as being super small inside, everything small. My husband love’s it, but it puts me at higher risk of real injury. I understand the alarm that the 1 lady mentioned. I learned in high school sex ed. That both partners get micro tares upon intercourse. It’s worse when dry. So without proper/ lots of lube you can actually ripp a person open. The porn star laughs the internal stitches off. I read it all the time. Oh haha look what I can survive. So it’s really important to listen to the advice provided. Slow, slow, gentle, communication. If you get blood, like 1 comment mentioned. Then up the lube and slow the #@$!% down! ! As small as I am I’ve only had blood when disrespected. Scar tissue don’t stretch it rippes. I’ve had a hysterectomy, I know that 1st hand as well. If you’re partner has a really hard time understanding, try what I always have. Try switching the vulnerability roles. Don’t mush the person’s insides just because it’s been done to you. Be nice, and it can usually become a nice addition to your sex life. A man cannot understand until he’s man enough to allow a woman that kind of experience. And manly men? It is not gay!! You want what you want from women, truth is what’s good for the gander is good for the goose, you’ll open doors that never existed before. Keep in mind that a woman’s body changes up to 500 times per day, just because it’s going well doesn’t mean that it cannot become very painful 1/2 way through. Stay versatile and keep mutual pleasure going. It also hurts me to have a man pull out all the time. It resets the butt back to tight. Also, being too rough can and does cause prolapse. Thank God I’ve never been hurt that bad. I’ve cared for people with prolapse. I came out of the forest in 97 and was a c.n.a. for 4 yrs. My biggest problem is the total lack of meaningful medical sexual education. For instance, most female rectum is on average 6 inches long. The gut can move some hence the super slow start. But hey men some of us will never be able to take 10 plus inches balls deep up the ass. That doesn’t make us less of a woman, just means you boys have to step up be real men and give a shit.. if you do you’ll be able to give your woman the kind of rectal orgasms. That I get. If you can, boy hang on you might get a broken dick during something that strong. Well gotta go suck my husband, get some lovin.
Taylor says
I’ve had a lot of anal sex before with women who were already experienced and I tried it with my current girlfriend for the first time. She was a bit drunk and on her period and was having a hard time giving me a blow job so she told me to do her wherever I wanted. I asked where she wanted and suggested tits or ass, she said she was down for ass if I wanted it. I told her what I wanted (ass) because it feels so good so she asked where the lube was and I got it.
I had to use vegetable oil because I had nothing around the house. TBH way better than the water or silicone lubes I’ve used in the past, much more glide and not so sticky and no need to keep adding more as it dried out.
I promised her that I would be gentle knowing it was her first time and if I blew it I might never get it again.
The position was lazy doggy (her on her belly with one leg up) mostly because she was pretty drunk which was the reason why she was having a hard time giving me a blow job despite trying.
I rubbed the dick around her hole up and down a bit to get her into the moment. The lube was all applied but I didn’t go for the finger because I just think she would have found it weird. I slipped it in really gentle not really pushing in much further than the head at first. Going really slow, almost coming out at times.
As I got more aroused she said it felt kind of weird like she had to poo. I told her I’d be gentle not to worry I wasn’t going to pound her or anything.
She asked me if it felt good and oh God dud it ever and I told her. She reiterated that she felt like she had to poo and I told her not to worry that’s normal.
As I kept going and getting hotter I went a little bit deeper but still gentle. Not thrusting hard or fast until closer to cumming.
I think I only really made it about just under 2 inches in when I came. (and holy F I came good it was incredible) . I gently pulled out and held her for a while.
She wanted to go to the bathroom and poo and also wanted the cum out because she found it weird to have cum in her ass (she’s on pills and my partner so this wasn’t about pregnancy or disease) . She went I don’t know what happened in the bathroom probably nothing came out but a dribble idk.
She didn’t complain of pain at all just the feeling of needing to poo, probably because her anus was looser than normal.
Hopefully I did it right for a first time. She was on a heavy part of her period so vaginal stimulation was not really an option (or we would have just done it that way).
I’d love to keep doing anal with her from time to time. It’s more of a treat for me than an everyday activity. Did I go about it right under the circumstances? I know she was a bit drunk but she’s my girlfriend and we do a lot of stuff drunk together lol.
FYI to any haters she likes being tied up, handcuffed, slapped, called slutty names and choked even when sober so no comments about how I took advantage of her drunkenness. I think if she gets into anal she’ll probably want all that and and solid anal pounding. I’m not the one into the choking her during sex or pain that’s all her fetish. I just like a good morning blow job I’m actually a bit of a prude other than anal haha but I oblige her, you gotta give to get 😉
Anon says
I never use lube on a girls anus. It takes away from the pleasure. There is nothing like hearing her moans louder and louder and grunting as I push in deep and fast as hard a possible. It hurts more the first few times you do It but after you get it gaping it ain’t so bad for them
redwoodrebelgirl says
You are a sick bastard.
No lube because it takes away YOUR pleasure?
Do you care about HER pain?
You LIKE her moaning in PAIN?
You sound like a sadist & a rapist.
Sick Fμ©#!!!
Bunny says
I want to try it in the ass. I’ve been married 39 years. I need some excitement in the bedroom.
Dominic says
I’m looking forward to having real anal sex with a girl i have done it numerous times with before. Previously i couldn’t penetrate her anus bcos it was too tight, all I did was hump her at the entrance of her anus, no further. But this time around we wanna move to another level, she wants me in there but i don’t have the necessary tools. I’m practising how to stretch her anus with just my fingers but i have no idea where i can get water-lube bcos it’s not sold in my country. I have had to use oil or saliva in our past encounters. But i have a few questions and i would appreciate answers. Can i loosen her anus with just my fingers? Will i be able to penetrate her using just oil & spit? If i use oil and it remains in her anus,would it cause damage or flush out when she defaecates? Do i need to use a condom when we’re both STI-free? Will her anus be stretched enough when i use my fingers as directed in this article? If her anus accomodates just one of my finger would it accomodate my penis too if i insert it in slowly? Pls any answers would be great. Hope to hear frm you soon!
Sean Jameson says
Yes, you can loosen her anus with your fingers. The loosening or stretching takes time.
Yes, you can just use oil or saliva. Keep in mind that most oils degrade condoms and cause them to break.
Small amounts of coconut or olive oil shouldn’t cause a problem.
I always advise using a condom.
Noel says
I think the fear of pain for anal is understandable it is a true sense of fear I honestly had it for a long time because I had a previous partner before my husband tear me cause he went to vigorous so I understand the fear of anal it’s the more logical fear to meat otherwise this article was helpful with helping figure out how to overcome the pain I had previous in anal so thank you very much it helped
Noel says
I think the fear of pain for anal is understandable it is a true sense of fear I honestly had it for a long time because I had a previous partner before my husband tear me cause he went to vigorous so I understand the fear of anal it’s the more logical fear to meotherwise this article was helpful with helping figure out how to overcome the pain I had previous in anal so thank you very much it helped
Kbird says
We (my lover and I) want to try anal; he loves it and is experienced, but it’s new to me. My question is, should I use an enema prior to bedtime, and, if so, how much earlier?
Sean Jameson says
I don’t think it’s necessary.
Sara Bonilla says
Me and my husband like having sex like daily using techniques i learned from sean but anal sex sometimes we wait a few days or weeks in between sometines not however when its been awhile it does hurt for like 10 seconds when he does penetrate sometimes he does use his fingers when I give him a blow job other tines he just gently penetrates but we never use lube or condoms i hate the feeling of condoms but What can I do to make it less painful that first 10 seconds and to make me actually orgams like a OMG orgams because from anal I never received a mind blowing orgasms
Mia Monroe says
I have been wanting to try anal sex for the longest time and I have spoken to my boyfriend about it ..but he disaproves as he feels its disgusting..Are there ways i can use to persuade him (since i dont want to cheat on him)..or are toys the best option for me
Sean Jameson says
Toys can definitely help, but also try talking to him about how clean and hygienic it can be with douching/enema beforehand
Kaina Navarro says
Hi Sean,
We tried having anal sex for a really long time but after reading your article about anal sex, i need to say it helped me A LOT! We were also using the wrong lubricant, so reading about the different lubricants actually helped me to choose one that is perfect for anal sex. Can’t wait to try some new stuff with my husband.
Rhea says
I really want to enjoy anal sex with my husband, but can’t seem to get over that feeling of needing to go to the bathroom. I’m terrified something may come out while we do it. What’s the best way to get past that “gotta poo” feeling? We want to work up to double penetration, but that’s not going to be possible until I can work through this. BTW – I’m absolutely loving your content. Very helpful!
Sean Jameson says
Try douching or even having an enema beforehand
Elisena says
Hi Sean,
Thank you for sharing your knowledge with us.
Which product would you recommend to use to stretch my anus?
My goal is to stretch during the day, so I can be ready for the night. Is it safe to keep a dilator inserted for couple of hours a day?
I’m not new to anal sex, but I’d like to improve my skills
.
Please let me know,
Thanks
Dick says
After my partner fucks my ass, is it safe for me to suck his cock if he has not cum in my ass?
Sean Jameson says
If he is using a condom, and takes it off or changes it, then yes. Otherwise no.
Christopher says
The one thing I notice about most sites is they forget to mention one very important thing … When you start to insert anything, let her know if she pushes like she’s going to go to the bathroom it automatically relaxes the sphincter muscles and things slide in more easily. In fact, they are sucked in once passed rhe anal sphincter ring. It sounds the opposite of what you might think but it’s physically true. If you can maintain the pushing sensation then your nervous system will take over and do it automatically; causing your sphincter/rectum and vagina to comfortably dilate. Many women squirt for the first time with anal stimulation. Knowing this will take away fears and make things soooo pleasurable. I’ve had women tell me that were afraid of anal; once I introduced this technique, most common reply was, “ I didn’t realize it felt so good”. ?
Calista says
Hey BGB-
I actually found your site after reading a discovery document- do you know the site is discussed in The Watts case? The mistress was reading this article before she went on a date with Chris Watts. Just wanted to share in case you didn’t know- the case has taken a life of it’s own online. I ended up reading the entire article, and though I’m not one for anal sex, I found it extremely informative. I remember when I was a teen I spent a ton of time searching online for articles about how to kiss, or how to have sex, and wish there was something as informative as this back then. You guys are doing awesome (and educational!) work.
Sean Jameson says
Interesting! Which discovery document and what page?
Benji says
Hi Sean!
Can you give some more proof that regular anal sex doesnt lead to inconsistency? I really enjoy some occasional anal sex with my gf, and according to her so does she(lucky enough to have anal orgasm), but we only do it about 2-3 times a year, because she is afraid of becoming inconsistent from anal. There are a lot of articles about studies on the internet which shows that anal sex leads to inconsistency. I want to be on the safe side.
Sean Jameson says
We’ll look into it and update the guide. Thanks Benji.
JS says
The first time I had a guy give me anal I wanted to try it but had no idea what it would be like. I was told it was “pain but pleasure”. Whst I experienced from the moment he just pressed my entry was the most unbelievably intense and greatest sexual experience ever. There was no turning back for me. I have several internal orgasms now every time I get anal and it’s a feeling I e never imagined. It was not long after when I no longer needed or wanted to have a male orgasm anymore.
Andy says
My girlfriend didn’t want to try anal, she had heard from a friend ( prude) that it was the worst thing ever. Well I talked her into trying it out one day after school we started off with foreplay and some easing of a finger into he anus, then two, then three but three made her whimper some. I turned her over and slid into her vagina to get my penis lubed up some and spit a little in her anus as it was slightly opened up already from the fingers. In one motion and as quick as possible I slid out of her vagina and shoved my penis into her anus to get it in quickly and avoid any hesitation from her. She fell forward onto her stomach and yelped but didn’t say stop. I asked her if that was the worst thing ever like her friend said and she said no it wasn’t the worst thing ever. So I started going at it, slow at first then hard and fast. I don’t think it was the most enjoyable thing in the world for her but she never said to stop, she only said please hurry up and cum in between moans. Needless to say I did after about 20min or so and it was probably the best orgasm I have ever had. But I did learn a lesson from this experience with her, definitely use lube when doing anal, I got a bit of a burn on my skin and she was bleeding pretty good for about a week. We always use lube now and after a few more months of daily or almost daily anal sex I can damn near fit my fist in her anus with lube. we started using a toy in her with my penis as well. It still isn’t her favorite thing to do but she knows I orgasm really hard when in her anus so she does it. We even recently talked one of her friends into joining us soon for her first anal, she told her friend that I would ” break her in good” her words not mine, I can’t wait since this girl is really really small and narrow so probably super tight and not gaped out like my girlfriends anus.
Please let these comments be trolls says
Wow, you are an asshole. What moron doesn’t know that, “Hurry up and cum” means “This sucks and I hate it, get the fuck off me”?
I had a guy just shove it my ass without warning and it was the single most intense prob I’ve ever experienced outside of an abscessed tooth. Your are trolly a piece of shit and I hope this girl has enough sense to leave your selfish ass.
Gofuckyourselvesassholes* says
I think it’s funny how people underestimate other people perceptual depth.
Chick says
I want to have anal sex with my Husband, we use lube and he fingers me for a while also eats me out, then we tried anal holy it was so Hot, gets me going mmmm
Jenn says
What about if you have a hemorrhoid? I’ve never had one until I gave birth to my 3rd child. I recently got with someone who is somewhat obsessed with anal. We tried, a little once and it started to bleed.. Is there an easier way of doing this with a fuckin hemorrhoid?!
Sean Jameson says
Try get it treated first
Cici says
The first time I ever had anal sex it hurt and I did bleed. But one thing is fosho I never tried it again. And tbh I doubt that I ever will.
Sean Jameson says
Sorry to hear you had such a bad first experience 🙁
Jasmine says
I’m scared to get fucked in my ass . I like to suck dick better men tend to give me what I want that way. Even though they say my big horse teeth get in the way.
Krista says
My husband really wants to have anal sex. I want to also. We have tried several times. I am very petite and my husband is around 9” the furthest we have got is my husband putting 2-3 inches inside me. It’s either too painful or my husband ejaculates to quick. I’ve been told that I should be able to take his whole penis inside my butt. I personally don’t see how that is going to happen. Any suggestions would be greatly appreciated.
Sean Jameson says
You may want to try some anal training first and even do it alone to get comfortable. Over time, you’ll be able to take a larger and larger size.
Snjezana S. says
Hi Sean,
I would like to have anal sex with my new boyfriend. As opposite to some women, he is not really into it. How do I gently persuade him to try it with me.
Thank you
Simone
Sean Jameson says
talk to him and let him know how much it turns you on
JJ says
You should NEVER put your mouth anywhere near someone’s ass without some sort of protection separating your tongue from their butt skin. You can use any of the things mentioned above but a piece of good saran wrap (not the super thin stuff) lube up the area then place a piece of the wrap over that. Don’t make it too tight because you want it to be loose enough so you can move your tongue around and inside. Your mouth touches nothing but the wrap but he feels like your tongue is touching him.
zena says
We both in our 50s and for me the regular pussy-fucking was becoming monotonous. We always sleep in nude to feel the warmth and affection between us. One night he was spooning me and I could feel his hard-on on my butt, I wriggled my bottom to fit in his cock between my crack. Suddenly I felt his cock nuzzling my anus. I asked him what he wanted – the ass, he answered. I too have been thinking about it watching some videos on anal sex. I asked him to wait and ran to the bathroom, there I took a dab of Vaseline into my anus and returned to him. Still spooning, he entered me from behind, It was a bit awkward and he was able to enter about 2 inches or so and came in a few minutes. It was a great breakthrough. Now we let him fuck my ass almost regularly. Really a great feeling and the act is improving day be day…
Renny Ambrose says
I need more tips on anal sex positions
Sean Jameson says
Check out our illustrated anal sex positions guide for that 😉
Roger says
I cannot believe you do not cover flushing and washing at all. This is the most important preparation step, everyone should be aware of this. How is using a dildo an advanced technique? Do you live under a rock? Smaller dildo’s are perfect for starting out. Why am I even bothering. JFC.
Sean Jameson says
We have an entire article on preparation for anal sex.