Eating ass is one of the sexual activities that few people seem to try despite the fact that it can feel good and be super intimate. If you’ve avoided the subject, even if you’re interested, or your partner has expressed interest in receiving, it’s time to learn how to eat ass!
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Eating booty might be incredibly intimate. If he expresses a desire to try this activity in the bedroom, he’s being vulnerable and trusting that you won’t judge him or rush off to tell all your friends. Obviously, you need to trust your partner if you’re going to dive between his cheeks.
But sharing something so vulnerable can be equally as intimate. You might not eat someone’s ass if they’re a one-night stand, but it’s something that may happen once you’re in an established relationship with someone. Knowing that your partner is willing to try new things with you or the lengths they’ll go to for your pleasure is powerful and erotic. Could this be one of the reasons why guys like anal sex?
Plus, the asshole is full of all sorts of nerve endings that make something like eating ass feel fantastic.
There are plenty of reasons why rim jobs lead to great orgasms.
Read on if you want to know how to give a great rim job…
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Talking About Eating Ass
Communicating is always essential when it comes to sex – and most things, really. It’s none truer than when you’re eating ass. You might need to politely inform your partner that he needs to shave or cleanse. Or if you’re the one who is interested in the subject, you may need to bring it up rather than waiting for him.
Even with the best of intentions, these conversations can go awry. The wrong words, the tone of voice, or timing can make someone less than receptive. For example, catching someone when they’re busy, tired or hungry might not be the most conducive to your discussion. And some concerns shouldn’t be discussed during sex specifically as they can ruin the mood.
If you don’t typically speak up about sex or other topics, it might be difficult for you to have conversations about eating ass (or even conversations about less tricky subjects). But you can learn skills such as how to speak to your partner without hurting feelings.
Communicating also helps you reassure your partner, which can keep you connected and help him relax so that he can enjoy you eating his ass. Relaxation is key for insertion, too. A tense body isn’t good for butt plugs (read more about plugs).
Check out our guide to sexual communication to learn how to better talk about sex.
One thing you might need to talk about if eating ass is your idea (or even if it’s his idea) is his hesitance. Many guys are nervous when it comes to sexual activities that involve his anus. He might be hung up on whether it’s dirty (it doesn’t have to be) or whether interest makes him gay (not when he’s having sex with a woman!).
We’ve recorded a Bad Girls Bible podcast episode that zeroes in on why some guys have such difficulty with anal activities such as pegging or even receiving a rim job. Listen now.
Eating Ass and Safety
Before you get down to eating ass, you might want to know if it’s a safe activity. Rimjobs do come with some risks. Like any sexual activity, you can spread STIs through anal sexual activity. In fact, STIs can spread even easier with anal activities.
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One survey found that women who participate in analingus have higher levels of C. albicans, a type of yeast that is sometimes found in the reproductive tract . Previous studies showed that gay men who practiced eating ass were more likely to have E. histolytica infections .
Bacteria from the anus can also cause infections in the mouth or vagina if those bacteria spread. Finally, if your partner has a stomach virus or bacterial infection, you may be able to contract it during anilingus .
Symptoms of a stomach bug can include nausea, vomiting, fever, diarrhea and weight loss, among other signs. Keep this in mind if you suddenly feel ill after eating your partner’s ass.
Even if there’s no penetration involved, using a barrier is smart. Dental dams are squares of plastic-like sheets that you can place against your partner’s body when performing oral stimulation . It also acts as a barrier that can make you more comfortable during a rim job.
If you’re applying lube to a dental dam, remember to apply it between the barrier and your partner for the most comfort. Similarly, if you move to penetration (you can use anal training to take larger toys) and use a condom, apply lube to both sides.
In a pinch, you can cut open a condom and use it like a dental dam.
Preparing for an Ass Licking
There are three major concerns when it comes to someone who is to have their ass licked: potential fecal matter, the smell, and hair. The first issue is similar if you’re going to be engaging in anal sex. A little poop can be a big deal and could potentially scar you and prevent you from enjoying anal activities in the future.
Cleanup doesn’t have to be super involved, however. A bowel movement helps to clear the anal tract. But you can use a douche with lukewarm water over the toilet to make sure. Unless you’re into the idea of wanting to be squeaky clean, you don’t need to use an enema.
Learn more about cleanup in this article on preparing for anal sex.
As for the smell, a shower does the trick – and can be worked into your sexy times. In a pinch, you can use wet wipes. The shower is also the perfect location to deal with hair in the area. All humans have hair on their bodies due to us being mammals, but the anus and genitals often have darker, thicker hair.
Get tips for incredible shower sex before learning how to eat booty.
Some people like to apply a flavored lube before a partner goes down on their anus.
If you want someone to eat your ass (or someone requests such a favor for you), taking care of the hair is expected. There are a few methods to consider:
- Shaving, which will result in stubble and you’ll need to repeat depending on how fast hair grows
- Trimming just to keep things neat but to avoid irritation from shaving
- Waxing at home for longer-lasting results
- Depilatory creams
- Professional waxing for its convenience and efficacy
All of the do-it-yourself methods can be a little tricky. You can’t see your ass; although, you can shave or trim in front of a mirror or even squat over one if it helps. Some people find it difficult to reach those places, too. It takes trial and error. But we have a few tips to help.
When you’re shaving, use a sharp razor. Shave in the direction of the hair growth, not against, in short strokes. A silky shaving cream softens hair to make it easier to shave, and it also conditions skin. Many people swear by hair conditioner as a stand-in for shaving cream. Whether you’re shaving or trimming, holding the cheeks open helps you access the hair.
Trimming might be the better option if you have sensitive skin and suffer from razor burn. You can also use an electric shaver, which removes hair but is less likely to cause nicks and cuts.
Get tips for shaving intimate areas and avoiding razor burn or ingrown hairs.
Waxing isn’t for everyone. If you haven’t mastered it on your legs, you might want to avoid the sensitive area around your anus. Burning yourself there would be pretty terrible! Hard wax that doesn’t require strips is probably your best option. You heat it in the microwave or on the stove, apply it, let it cool for a moment, then pull the wax – hair included – off.
If waxing sounds easier said than done, it typically is. There’s a lot of margin for error, and this is exactly why people pay others to wax their hair. Of course, not everyone can afford routine waxing or wants a stranger to see their genitals and asshole, but it’s one way to present a clean canvas if someone is going to be eating your ass.
The last hair removal option is a depilatory cream, which we advise using with great care. Those creams chemically burn off your hair and can be harsh on your skin. Sensitive formulas such as those made for the face are your best option, but you still don’t want to leave them on any longer than you have to. If your hair is especially coarse, a depilatory cream may not be effective.
Depending on your comfort level, you might want to help your partner remove hair or ask for help. It can be an intimate experience, but it’s not for everyone. It might cause you anxiety when your partner is wielding a razor near such a sensitive part of your body.
You might consider anal bleaching if your partner is going to eat your ass. It’s an option, but it’s not necessary. The anus is naturally darker than the surrounding skin, but this doesn’t mean it’s dirty. The same is actually true for most genitals.
Learn more about anal bleaching to determine if it’s for you.
Dealing With Gas
Gas might not be pleasant, but it is a reality of eating ass. You can’t know whether your partner is feeling bloated, so you might want to direct him to this post to help assuage his fears.
First, he should watch what he eats so he doesn’t become gassy. This might mean avoiding bananas or carbonated drinks. Everyone reacts differently, so he knows what will set him off.
You might have noticed that you’re more gass during certain times: your period or while pregnant (learn more about anal sex during pregnancy). So you avoid anal sex and activities during these times. He doesn’t have to.
Some people prefer to take a pill such as GasX to prevent any flatulence.
If he does feel like he’ll have to fart, he should feel free to do it before things get started rather than trying to hold it in.
You’ll find many of these same tips in our guide to preparing for anal sex.
How to Eat Ass – Tips and Techniques
Once you’ve got hygiene taken care of, you might want to dive right in. But we recommend taking things slowly as you eat ass. Taking your time builds anticipation and sexual tension, which can make your experience more intense.
Anilingus Foreplay – Before zeroing in on the asshole, you might massage, knead and kiss the butt cheeks. After biting the fleshy part of the cheeks, you might move toward the asshole but back again before making contact. Let your partner feel your breath on his skin, genitals, and anus. You can lick the cheeks before moving to the asshole.
Making Shapes With Your Tongue – Remember that the tongue can be used flat for a more soft and broad surface or pointed and tense. Tapping the broad side of your tongue against your partner’s anus might feel good while curling it for insertion may do the trick. Pay attention to your partner’s reactions or even ask which technique they prefer.
Tongue Techniques – Techniques can include going up and down, side to side, around in a circle, kissing, sucking and even gentle use of your teeth. Try a figure-8 with your tongue to switch things up./
A Cool Breeze – Don’t forget about your breath, either. If you purse your lips, you can blow a cool stream of air across your partner’s asshole. A wider mouth produces warmer breath.
Use Your Fingers Too – Your fingers can be as useful as your tongue when it comes to licking ass, however (tips for anal fingering here). You can place them on either side of the anus and tap your tongue against your partner’s asshole. You might continue to massage or knead their buttcheeks, too. Tips for prostate massage.
And Your Hands – Using your hands, you can separate your partner’s cheeks for greater access or squeeze them together to change the sensation.
Reach Around – Don’t forget about your partner’s genitals. You can reach around to fondle testicles or stroke a penis as you’re eating ass (and many men love that). Get tips for giving a handjob while you’re eating ass. You can even suck his balls then move back to the anus.
What Next? – You don’t have to lick for a long time or until he reaches orgasm. Eating ass can be foreplay, and you can segue into pegging (learn what pegging is) or using toys, for example (discover why anal beads are great toys). You can also learn how to use a strap-on.
Related: How to Suck Balls
You might realize that your partner’s cheeks need to be spread to properly eat ass. If your hands are free, you can spread your partner’s cheek yourself. But you might ask for assistance to keep your hands free.
Anal sex can be a good warmup for anal sex, which shouldn’t hurt. Does anal hurt? You can do something about the pain.
Positions for a Rim Job
Knowing how to eat ass isn’t just about technique. Finding the proper position is also important for everyone’s comfort. The following positions can be used for eating ass:
- Kneeling on the floor or sitting on a piece of furniture while your partner stands
- Kneeling or sitting behind your partner on the bed while they are in doggie position
- Lying between your partner’s legs as they lie on the bed with their legs up (a pillow under their hips can give you greater access)
- 69 position – check out some of these 69 sex positions to see what works
You can place a pillow under your knees for any position that might become strenuous or boost your partner with a pillow. Memory foam is ideal for this because it doesn’t compress.
Some anal sex positions work well if you simply kneel behind your man.
Tools of the Trade
Flavored lube can also help by making a rim job more slippery but also mask any unpleasant tastes or odors. However, if someone has cleaned themselves first, the anus will have a generally neutral flavor like clean skin.
Read More: What Is Lube and Why Should You Use It?
Depending on your comfort level, you might want to kiss your partner after eating ass. This is a personal decision that every couple has to make. Some people aren’t even comfortable with their partner kissing them after oral sex.
Warning! – One thing you shouldn’t do is go directly from a rim job to oral sex, especially on a woman. This can introduce bacteria into the vagina that leads to an infection known as bacterial vaginosis (read more about BV). Using a dental dam is one option to prevent spreading bacteria.
Men are less susceptible to bacterial infections, which means you can lick from his anus to his balls to incorporate them into your oral ministrations.
You can rinse your mouth before performing oral sex. Water will remove some bacteria, but mouthwash is even better because it kills bacteria. It also might be tingly when you kiss or go down on your man, which he may like (or not).
Like many sexual activities, eating ass is about confidence and communication. Once you’ve established the basics of how to toss the salad, it’s all about communicating with your partner and paying attention to their cues to give them what they like!
What The Science Says
You might not think that scientists are paying attention to anilingus, but that’s not true! Several studies have looked into the health effects of eating ass, which is how we know that using a dental dam is a smart move.
Researchers have found that:
- You can contract stomach bugs such as entamoeba histolytica, amebiasis, giardiasis, shigella when you eat ass   . Parasites including threadworms can be transmitted through this activity .
- You can get oral infections after giving a rim job .
- Analingus can transmit STIs such as hepatitis   and HPV in the form of anal warts .
Related: STI Symptoms You Have to Know
Buzzfeed has an entertaining comic tutorial about how to eat ass.
Condom Depot runs down the possible infections, oral, vaginal and anal, that you can contract from eating ass.
Frequently Asked Questions
If you’re short on time, we answer some of your common questions about eating ass below.
Q: Is eating ass messy?
A: It’s not as messy as you might think! For someone who is regular and not experiencing any GI distress, the rectum will be empty. It doesn’t typically contain fecal matter, which is actually stored in the intestines.
Plus, your partner can take a few steps that we describe above, to make rimming as pleasant as possible for you.
Read more in the Analingus Guide.
Q: What are the risks of eating ass?
A: Although it’s pretty safe to rim someone (discover more about anal sex safety), it’s not without its risks. Major risks include oral infections when anal bacteria enter a wound or cavity in the mouth, passing of stomach bugs, or STI transmission. You can avoid these risks by using a barrier such as a dental dam (or a condom in pinch) and waiting for any stomach troubles to pass.
There’s no risk of pregnancy from anal activities. Read more.
Q: Isn’t eating ass for gay couples?
A: While many gay couples do incorporate rim jobs into their sexual routines, this definitely doesn’t mean that a straight couple can’t enjoy it, too! Men and women both can enjoy the feeling of a tongue in and around their anus.
Because the anus is so sensitive, your man might even enjoy anal masturbation. Find out what makes anal masturbation so good.
Q: What if it’s just too weird for me?
A: We understand that some people just can’t wrap their heads around the idea of eating ass, no matter how much preparation is done. You might try it, and decide it’s not for you. Or you might not get that far at all. If this is you, that’s okay.
It’s important that you talk to your partner and explain that you’re uncomfortable. Be careful when doing so that you don’t make your partner feel bad. It’s okay to say “I’m not comfortable” rather than “It’s just too gross!”
Watch This: Blow Job Tutorial Video
I put together this in-depth, step-by-step instructional video that will teach you how to make your man sexually addicted to you and only you. It contains a number of oral sex techniques that will give your man full-body, shaking orgasms. If you're interested in learning these techniques to keep your man addicted and deeply devoted to you as well as having a lot more fun in the bedroom, then you may want to check out the video. You can watch it by clicking here.