This discreet newsletter will teach you how to make him cum hard, give freaky oral sex & make him scream your name in bed. Click here to get it.
When you’ve tried bondage, sex in public places and edging, what’s left to do in bed? How about a little anal play? One of the easiest ways to see whether you’d like to experience anal sex and a way to provide your man with extreme pleasure is through anal fingering.
You might even be able to orgasm from anal stimulation. Check out this advice to have an anal orgasm.
Side note: If you are currently struggling to orgasm during sex or masturbation, then you may want to learn about the Easy Orgasm Solution. It begins by teaching you the techniques to orgasm easily and consistently. Then you'll learn how to have multiple vaginal and full body orgasms during sex and masturbation. You can find out more here.
Anal Sex Podcast
If you want to learn some powerful anal sex techniques for intense orgasms, then you may want to listen to this podcast episode. You’ll learn 11 things you must do in order to make it wildly pleasurable, fun & satisfying and avoid any pain, embarrasment or mess.
Listen to more podcast episodes here
Does Everyone Enjoy Anal Stimulation?
Let’s start by getting this out of the way. Anal stimulation isn’t for everyone whether it’s fingering, a penis, playing with a safe toy or even just stimulating around the anus. Many men are worried that liking anal play means they’re gay. It doesn’t. Gay, straight and bisexual men are all equipped with nerve endings and prostates that allow them to enjoy anal stimulation of all types. Sexuality may differ, but biology doesn’t.
Learn more about prostate massage.
Secondly, it’s often more common for women to be on the receiving end than men. This works for many couples. However, you may simply not be into the idea of anal play. Nevertheless, you won’t know if you might like it unless you try it, so we suggest you give anal fingering a try!
Related: If you want to give your man back-arching, toe-curling, screaming orgasms that will keep him sexually addicted to you, then you'll find them in my private and discreet newsletter. You'll also learn the 5 dangerous & "dumb" sex mistakes that turn him off and how to avoid them. Get it here.
Communicating About Anal Stimulation
Even though many people enjoy having their ass played with, it’s not something you should rush into without first making sure your partner is okay with it. Verbal communication before the fact is the easiest way to see where your man stands on the issue, whether you’re interested in having your own ass stimulated or you’re interested in adding to his pleasure. You could even show him this article to gauge his interest!
Sometimes a surprise finger in the ass can be well received, but you’re risking completely turning your partner off if you venture into uncharted territories without his permission. Even if he likes anal play, he might not be prepared for it, which could lead to an unpleasant experience or the end of your sexual liaisons. Similarly, you might want time to shower or otherwise prepare for a foray into ass play.
If your lover is into the idea, you might eventually move to pegging, which is where you fuck him with a strap-on. This can play into D/s roles because giving anal stimulation is so powerful.
Additional Info: What Is Pegging? Everything You Need to Know!
Preparing for Anal Stimulation
Whether you’re new to anal play or you want to make your man feel more comfortable about anal fingering or even a toy in his ass, preparation will help ensure a smooth experience. If you rush into this type of sexual play, it may be uncomfortable or even lead to pain and bleeding. Of course, who would want to try anal fingering again after an experience like that? So follow these guidelines for a positive anal fingering experience.
Anal sex shouldn’t hurt. More about this.
If you’re tense, it will literally make it harder for you to enjoy anal play. So take a deep breath and let the tension out of your body. It may help to relax your throat as this can also relax muscles in your butt. Obviously, planning allows you to relax. Try a relaxing song or even a little social lubricant. Just don’t overdo it because you want to retain control. More tips about relaxing for anal.
The right position can help you relax. Check out this list of positions for anal sex. You may need to adapt some of them if you’re having anal while pregnant.
Most anal receivers are concerned about their personal hygiene, but you’ll want to consider the hygiene of whoever is doing the anal fingering, too. Don’t believe porn, where every starlet has perfectly manicured nails that are nearly an inch long. You would never want that coming near your backside! Instead, nails should always clipped short and without ragged edges, which can cause internal tearing.
Click here if you want to learn to use fingernails in a sexy way.
Wearing a glove or even just clipping a single finger from a glove to wear over your digit can prevent any damage to your partner’s rectum in addition to making lube application and cleanup a breeze.
Of course, many people are considered about preparing for anal play. We all know what the anus is actually designed for, but that doesn’t mean it can’t also provide pleasure. After all, the main function of the vagina is menstruation and childbirth!
It’s important to prepare before someone eats your ass, too.
Related: What You Need To Know About Rim Jobs And More Orgasms and All About Tossing Salad
There’s always a chance that you might run into a little fecal matter when providing anal stimulation to a lover, but those chances are lower with anal fingering than with using a dildo or penis that penetrates further. Having a prior bowel movement to clear out the canal will certainly help. Many people feel more comfortable being on the receiving end of anal fingering after having a shower.
Related: How To Use A Strap On With Your Man For Maximum Fun
You probably don’t need to, but there are two additional steps you can take to make sure you’re squeaky clean for anal penetration. These include using a douche containing luke-warm water splashed into your butt to remove any remaining fecal matter. An enema is more invasive but will do the ultimate cleanup job.
Lube for Anal Play
Lube is a must when it comes to anal sex, and you might want to consider it with anal fingering, too. The anus provides no natural lubrication, which can lead to tiny tears and even increase your risk of sexually transmitted infections. You can opt for a water-based lube because it’s less expensive, but those tend to dry up faster and become sticky as they do. But they wash off easily with water.
Here are a couple water-based lubes to consider.
- Sliquid Naturals Sassy is intended specifically for anal play.
- Maximus is a thick lube great for use with toys.
- System Jo H2O is the company’s water-based lube.
- System Jo Naturals comes in both water and silicone formulas and is intended to feel similar to your natural lubrication.
Silicone-based lubes are also condom compatible (condoms aren’t necessary for preventing pregnancy during anal – more about this). They tend to be thinner but last longer without reapplication, which is perfect for marathon sexual sessions. Silicone lubes do require soap and water to remove. Sliquid’s Silver receives high praise, and Pjur is also well-known for its silicone lubricants.
If you’re looking for something in between, companies now make hybrids that tend to be a little thicker than pure silicone lube but longer lasting than water-based lubricants. System Jo Hybrid, Sliquid Silk and Wet Synergy are examples of these hybrid lubricants.
Anal Fingering for Him
Now that you’re cleaned up or your partner is ready to explore some anal fingering, what can do you. Let’s start with ideas for him.
A man’s anus is one of the most powerful erogenous zones in his body thanks to the prostate. The prostate is located around two inches inside a man’s anus, toward his stomach. You can curl your fingers during anal fingering, and curved toys work better for prostate stimulation. It feels somewhat like a walnut, and your man will likely recognize it as soon as you find it. Although, some men don’t.
The prostate responds to greater pressure than other erogenous zones. Some men like on-and-off pressure from the pad of a finger, while others will simply like the feeling of their prostate being pressed during sexual intercourse or a blowjob.
However, not every man loves prostate play, and there are other options when it comes to anal fingering to him. You can slowly work your way closer to his anus and rub around the anus and the puckered ring. A simple in-and-out motion might be pleasurable while you’re pleasing him with your other hand or mouth, and you can add more fingers as he becomes comfortable with the sensation.
Why Women Enjoy Anal Fingering
As a woman, you don’t have a prostate, but that doesn’t mean you can’t enjoy anal stimulation. The thin wall between the anus and vagina allows sensation to move through, which means that anal stimulation can feel especially pleasurable when you’re having sex or playing with a sex toy. In fact, some women enjoy stimulating their own backdoor during masturbation, and that’s a great way to become accustomed to the sensations before you explore anal fingering with your partner.
When it comes to digital stimulation of your own posterior, you don’t have to rush into penetration. Start by inviting your partner to grab your ass, massage your cheeks and even give a little spanking if you’re into that. Before he gets to anal fingering, he can run the pad of his finger or thumb around your anus. Even if he gets no further than this, you might find it quite pleasurable, especially when added to clitoral stimulation or penetrative intercourse.
Hey, wanna know why guys like anal sex? Find out now. You can also discover if women like anal sex.
Your partner can move from the area surrounding your anus to directly over it, even covering it with his finger before experimenting with anal fingering. Of course, penetration is the next logical step, and a finger or two is a great workup to your partner’s penis. If you’re not into fingering your own backdoor, you might not want something larger like a penis or anal-safe toy.
Learn more about anal sex and safety.
However, you should never go from the anus to the vagina, which can transmit bacteria and lead to nasty infections. Unrolling a condom over your partner’s fingers or using a glove can help to prevent the transmission of bacteria, and you should always switch condoms when moving between anal and vaginal sex.
Some people love feeling stretched and even try to use toys as big as possible. This is known as anal training, and you can read more info on anal training.
While you might not like anal fingering or even incorporate backdoor exploration into every sexual rendez-vous, you might be pleasantly surprised how much you like adding a little anal play to intercourse or masturbation. And the thrills you get from pleasing your own partner through anal and prostate stimulation are second to none!
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yippy ki ay says
This spring I was at a mostly gay men’s motel and nude resort in the southwest. I entered the office Ala nude to pose questions about future reservations , there was a good looking gentleman checking in, as he got up I offered to help with his luggage..Once in his room he reached down and began playing with my cock which led to some intense kissing. We fell onto the bed and began pleasuring one another orally. He began playing with my ass as we engaged in 69, it felt really good, so I rolled over on my back as he began inserting more fingers. I couldn’t believe the intense rush as he got more fingers in and began massaging my prostrate, I was litterly squirming on the bed and moaning for more. I arched my back ,then was able to get my spread legs onto the head board to open my ass ass even more as he got all five fingers entered. I have never experienced that kind of intense pleasure, I was shaking all over as I released a torrent of pre cum followed shortly by the most toe curling orgasm of cum I have ever experienced!!! On our next meeting I expect to get fisted for another ultimate sexual experience.
Mohammed Saleem says
Iv kissed but never tried the 69 position
Guest says
I don’t have lube nothing so I don’t know what to do and I want an orgasm a good one but have nothing but my finger and no lube .
AB says
Use oil babe.. olive oil, coconut oil..
Great for anus play
Krista says
I have never managed to complete anal sex. My husband is too big and I am very petite. A couple times has been able to get the head of his penis in side me and then cums too fast the most we can do is 2 fingers inside my butt. It feels good. I would like to experience my husband whole 8.5” inside at least once. Any suggestions.
Sean Jameson says
Sounds like you need to try some anal training in order to take him comfortably
no name lol says
Def anal training. The entire process is really fun. Hubs & I also stretch vaginally to and OH MY LAWD.. I never thought i’d like something like that but it will blow your mind. The stretching feels good but the fullness is even better, and he loves the feeling after a good stretching/fisting session
Snow says
I did anal training for 2 months to fit my boyfriends 6’6 inch dick…well worth it!
MayWady Min says
My boyfriend ask me to have threesome including anal sex by stranger . Should I admit?
Sean Jameson says
What do you want?