There are more than kinky sex ideas and tips on this page than you can use in next year, so my advice is to bookmark it.
Podcast: 11 Kinky Blow Job Tips
In addition to reading the guide below, you may want to listen to this podcast, where you will learn how to give your man the best blow job he has ever received. I also cover the horrendous mistakes women make BEFORE they even begin their blow job.
Side note: If you are currently struggling to orgasm during sex or masturbation, then you may want to learn about the Easy Orgasm Solution. It will teach you how to have multiple vaginal and full body orgasms during sex and masturbation. It works even if you currently struggle to orgasm during sex or when masturbating. You can find out more here.
Listen to more Bad Girls Bible podcast episodes here
Now, you may want to skip straight to really kinky stuff by clicking here, but if you have the time, then I’d strongly recommend reading the next paragraphs to ensure you get the most out of this guide.
1. Great Communication is Key
The most important factor when it comes to having kinkier sex with your partner is understanding the importance of communication…
“I dunno Sean, that sounds boring!”
It sure does, but without proper communication, you’re not going to fully understand what your partner needs, and he will only be able to guess what you need and enjoy.
If you want to learn more, then check out our guide on sexual communication here.
Great communication also means using a safe word if you are attempting anything potentially dangerous. More on safe words.
2. Some Things Will Feel “Meh,” And That’s Ok
There are so many different kinky ideas, tips and games on this page, but not all of them will be enjoyable for you or your man.
And that’s perfectly fine!
The key is finding what works for you and expanding on it. If you find that rough sex ( is your thing, that’s great, keep expanding on it.
If you don’t like the idea of involving others in your sex life, then avoid it!
I wish I didn’t have to say it, but I get so many emails from people asking me how to enjoy something they don’t enjoy! It may be a conundrum for you too, but here’s the truth.
Sex isn’t like tax season where you have to pay your taxes. You only have to have the sex you want to have.
3. Start Slow
If you are trying some new kinky idea you’ve just found on this page, or elsewhere on the Bad Girls Bible site, then my advice is to start slow and try the tamest version of it first.
So, if you want to try getting spanked by your man, get him to use his hand or a hairbrush first before you spend $100’s on whips, paddles, and floggers.
Ok, let’s jump in with my first kinky sex idea you can try with your man…
4. Blindfolds
“Blindfolds? Well duh, Sean, that’s the most obvious kinky sex idea I’ve ever heard!”
Ok, ok, I know most of you have probably tried this one already, but hear me out…
I don’t want to tell you how to blindfold your man. That’s the easy part, just use a towel, eye mask or buy a blindfold. It’s what you do while he’s blindfolded that’s important.
With this in mind, here are a few kinky things you can do to your man while he’s blindfolded.
Hold & Cold
When your man is blindfolded, you’re going to tease him with some hot and cold sensations…
- Run an ice cube over his nipples, penis, balls, and lips.
- Taking some warm chocolate sauce in your mouth, start giving him a blow job (just make sure it’s not so hot that it scalds him). Here are 31 blow job techniques you can use to light his fire.
- Try giving him a blow job with some ice water or even chilled champagne in your mouth. Here are another 19 powerful blow job tips that will have him crying out in pleasure.
Question Game
Next, you can play a simple question & answers game and give him rewards or punishments depending on his answers. Check out suggested punishments and rewards later on in the article.
Lead Him Somewhere New
You can also lead your man somewhere else when you blindfold him. This can be somewhere boring like to another bedroom or the living room. But if you want to be kinkier, you could also bring him to the basement, garage or even outside if public play is your thing.
The other benefit of blindfolding your man is that you may find there is less pressure on you. If you often feel pressure to put on a performance for your man or feel self-conscious about yourself during sex, then making him wear a blindfold can help alleviate this pressure.
5. Restraints
Restraints have near limitless possibilities when it comes to kinky sex. Here are some of my favorite ways you can use restraints to spice things up.
Using your body on his body – This is the easiest as it doesn’t require any equipment. You can use your hands to pin down your man’s hands above him, behind his back or to his side. You can also use your body weight to restrain him by lying on top of him.
Handcuffs, rope, ties & bondage equipment – The more obvious choice when restraining your man is by using something like a pair of handcuffs or rope or specialty bondage equipment to restrain him. Here are a few kinky examples that hopefully spark even more ideas for you:
- Handcuff him behind his back.
- Tie his wrists to the bedposts and his ankles too.
- Tie his ankles to a spreader bar to leave him feeling vulnerable.
- Put him in a straightjacket to let him know who’s boss.
- Hogtie him to completely humiliate him.
- You can even restrain his penis using a chastity device.
Usually, it’s the submissive being restrained, but this isn’t always the case. Unsure who should be tied up? Take this quiz to discover if you’re more dominant or submissive.
6. Spanking
The first thing you should know about this kinky idea is that some find spanking incredibly hot and arousing, while others don’t enjoy it at all. You can literally make your man cry with pleasure and pain at the same time. It all comes down to personal preference. With that in mind, I hope you’ll at least experiment with it.
And here’s a few ways you can do just that…
During sex
If your man is on top of you during sex or in any position where it’s easy to reach his bum, then you can try spanking him. Just use an open palm and if you like you can lightly grab him or rub him after you’ve hit him. The key is experimenting and seeing what he responds to best.
If you are playing a kinky sex game with your man, and he fails a task or if you’ve caught him doing something naughty/forbidden, then you may want to punish him with a spanking. You can tell him to get on all fours or to remain standing and place his hands against the wall or even to lean over a table.
Then it’s a simple case of handing out his punishment (pun very much intended). Learn how to use punishments and rewards during sex.
A great way to further inflict your will on your man when you are spanking him is to make him count each strike.
Tools
If you really enjoy spanking, then there are a bunch of tools that can help you achieve a similar level of pain/pleasure, depending on the sensation you enjoy:
- Whips
- Floggers
- Paddle
- Crop
- Slappers
- Canes
One Big Warning
Spanking leaves a mark and causes small amounts of damage to the skin and tissues on your man’s backside provided you aren’t too vigorous in your striking. However, if you spank him on his kidneys or spine, then you are going to cause serious damage. Don’t do this. My advice is to focus only on his bum.
7. Make Oral Sex Crazy Kinky
Giving you man a blow job or having him go down on you to eat you out may not sound like the craziest kinky idea, but it can be. Here’s how…
Hands on Head
When your man goes down on you, you can put your hands behind your head and let him get to work…or you can use your hands to provide guidance.
Just put them in his hair or rest them on top of his head at first.
Then, when he starts doing something really satisfying, start slowly rubbing and massaging his scalp. But, if he starts doing something that’s not particularly enjoyable, stop massaging him. This is an easy way to give him feedback as he’s giving you cunnilingus (advice here). Of course, make sure to be vocal in your feedback too.
The other great thing about having your hands on his head when he is licking your pussy is that if you need more pressure you can just pull him closer into you.
Of course, your man can also use these exact tips when you are giving him a blow job
Eye Contact
Maintaining eye contact while your man gives you cunnilingus or while you’re giving him a blow job instantly makes it more intimate.
“But this is a guide on having kinky sex,” I hear you say…
Don’t worry; there is a really kinky way to use eye contact during a blow job or when he’s eating you out…
You need to make eye contact with him right at the point of orgasm. It’s incredibly powerful.
If you’re looking for more tips on how to use eye contact during oral sex, check out Chapter 3 of the Blow Job Guide.
Where You Do It
Another easy way to make a blow job or cunnilingus hotter is to do it in a place that’s out of the ordinary. Here are a few ideas.
- In a car (just make sure you’re not breaking any laws!)
- At a really breathtaking spot, think the top of a mountain or a cliff, on a beach or anywhere with an incredible view.
- In an empty room at a party.
The Finish
You can give your man a really straightforward and even boring blow job, but if you finish it right, then it can be super hot. Here are a few kinky ways to finish your blow job…
- Into your hand and then pour it into your mouth.
- Into your mouth and then swallowing it while maintaining eye contact.
- On your face, neck, breasts, ass, back or any body part that your man obsesses about.
69
The 69 position is so simple to perform, yet so much fun! Rather than repeating myself, you should check out the 69 position guide here to learn all the different ways that you can perform it.
You can learn a lot more on how to give your man the best blow job of his life in the very detailed Blow Job Guide.
8. Punishments & Rewards
A very simple way to make your sex life kinkier is to introduce rewards and punishments.
Now before we dive in and I explain how these will work, you need to understand one important thing when using rewards and punishments in your sex life…
This is about having fun…not controlling your partner. If you use rewards and punishments to control your man, then he’s going to resent you. But if you use them only to make your sex life more exciting, then you’re going to have a lot of fun.
Now here are some ideas that you can use as rewards and punishments in your sex life…
- She cums first. If not he gets a spanking.
- No orgasms for a week. If he breaks this, he has to clean the house.
- At least 10 minutes of penetration before he cums. If not, he has to go down on her.
- She must wake him up with a blow job. If not she needs to give him a blow job while he watches TV.
- “69 Race” – When performing the 69 position, the first person to have an orgasm is the loser and has to bring the winner breakfast in bed.
You can also use a direct punishment and reward system. It’s up to you how difficult you want to make it. Here are some example rewards and punishments you can use…
Rewards
- 10 seconds of oral sex
- 20-second hand job
- 15 seconds of sex
- 60 seconds of passionate kissing
- 30 seconds of massaging his balls
Punishments
- Spanking
- Tickling
- Face slapping
- Pinching
- Grabbing his balls
9. Rough Him Up
Kinky sex can be very cerebral by talking dirty or introducing rewards and punishments, but there is also a physical and almost caveman-like aspect that can be really enjoyable as well…I’m talking about getting rough with your man.
Here’s how:
Use Your Nails
The easiest way to get more physical with your man is to use your nails.
- If you’re in a position like Missionary or Coital Alignment Technique, then you can easily scratch his back, shoulders, and arms with them. Reaching lower and grabbing his ass should also be possible
- You can be light or rough with him. My advice is to start light and get some feedback from him on what he likes.
- You can scratch all up and down his back or you can just dig your nails in in the same place.
Use Your Mouth & Teeth
Next is gently using your teeth. The emphasis here is on “gentle”. You don’t work to really hurt him.
- You can easily give your man a hickey while kissing him on his neck or anywhere on his body.
- Depending on what sex position you’re in, you can gently bite and suck on any part of his body. Just make sure to avoid his penis and balls, as these are too sensitive.
- Try grabbing him, holding him tightly and gently biting him as he starts cumming.
Use your strength
Your mouth and hands are just a small part of the equation. Using your strength to “overpower” your man can also make for some super kinky sex. Here are a few ideas on how to do that.
- In the Cowgirl Position, try pinning your man’s hands above his head.
- When you want to change position, take control and try to move your man’s body into the new position with some force, so he can feel your strength.
- Try putting your hand(s) on his neck and lightly choke him. Learn how to choke your partner.
Some Notes On Roughing Him Up
There is a right way and wrong way to have rough sex with your man.
The right way is to do what comes naturally to you. If you are naturally very submissive and don’t like being rough in bed with your man, then don’t feel like you have to do it. Besides, it will feel forced and unnatural which will kill the mood.
The right way is to talk to your man and make sure to get feedback from him on what he likes and dislikes (and to let him know your preferences too!). Maybe he adores getting scratched? Maybe he hates it? You’ll never know unless you get some feedback from him.
10. Hair Pulling
Pulling his hair or him pulling your hair can fall under the category of roughing him up, that I discussed above. But it can also lead to some intense pleasure and kinky sex.
But, keep in mind that…
Hair pulling can be pleasurable, kinky and erotic or plain painful depending on how you do it. Let’s start with the right way to pull someone’s hair…
The Right Way
- The pleasurable part of everyone’s scalp is the very back. I’m talking about the opposite side of yourd head to your face.
- Start with your four fingers on the back of his neck, below his hairline. Then slowly push them upwards, lightly scratching his scalp with your nails as you do it.
- When you reach the top of his head, grab his hair with some gentle force. Now, you’re not trying to pull it out of his scalp, but, equally, you shouldn’t be so gentle that he can’t feel it either.
- Start slowly pulling downwards, allowing his hair to gradually slip out of your grip as you do it.
- Repeat as much as you like and try to mix things up by using your other hand or even both hands.
Hint: The easiest way to practice this is on yourself, figure out what you like and then try it on your man.
Some Notes on Hair Pulling
- Pulling his hair on anywhere else on his head is almost always going to feel painful, not pleasurable.
- If he doesn’t have a lot of hair or has a shaved head, then focus on lightly scratching the back of his scalp instead.
- As with all these kinky sex ideas, get feedback from your man afterward to see how much he enjoys and what parts he loves most.
11. Wrestling
Wrestling may sound silly, but it’s the perfect prelude to some kinky sex. Think of it like play-fighting and flirting mixed.
There is something incredibly hot about trying to pin your man down with all your strength and desperately trying to make him submit to you before he then overpowers you and gains the upper hand, pinning you down and taking what he wants.
The easiest way to start wrestling with your man is to wait until you’re in bed together. Try tickling him when he says something silly and he will naturally try to stop you. Now’s your chance to start play-fighting. As you do, make sure to kiss him at the same time, so he knows what’s on your mind. Here’s a few ways to wrestle with you man…
- Try pin him on his back with you straddling him.
- Try pin his arms over his head.
- Try (gently) twisting his arm behind his back.
After trying successfully in bed a few times, you can start to try it elsewhere like in the house…or ever outside the house.
Remember the aim of the game here is to have fun while getting physical with your man. You should both be laughing and enjoying yourselves. If you are totally serious, then you’re not going to have a lot of fun.
12. Degradation & Humiliation
Degradation & humiliation can be incredibly kinky IF (and it’s a big IF), you both enjoy this kind of play and respect each other’s boundaries.
So what do I mean by degradation & humiliation?
Here are a few ideas
- Being spat on.
- Being slapped.
- Having your hair grabbed (painfully) and led around by your man.
- Being kept in a confined space like a cage.
- Made to eat from a bowl on the ground.
- Being disrespected verbally or otherwise.
- Being made to wear a collar and/or leash.
- Being “forced” to stay naked.
- Being referred to as something derogatory. Think of names like slut, bitch, bimbo, slave, etc.
- Being “forced” to doing embarrassing things in public.
Here’s another 129 BDSM humiliation and erotic degradation ideas to always keep it fresh.
Some Notes on Degradation & Humiliation
My advice on incorporating these ideas into your sex life is to discuss them BEFORE you try them with your man. If either you or your man doesn’t like the idea degradation or humiliation and is blindsided with spitting and slapping, then you’re in for an awful time.
If you want to dip your toe in the humiliation/degradation space, then my advice is to start slow with dirty talking and then progress from there IF you both enjoy it.
Using a safe word is vital in case things get too much, and you want to stop.
13. Pleasure From Pain aka Sadism & Masochism
Being degraded or humiliated may do absolutely nothing for you, but pain may be your thing.
Do you like that tingle you get when your man slaps your ass? If so you may be a little masochistic.
Or maybe you enjoy seeing your man’s face wince when you slap or pinch him? In this case, you could be a bit of a sadist.
There are plenty of ways to inflict a little (or a lot) of pain on your partner if you’re a sadist. And of course, you can reverse these roles too if you’re more of a masochist. Here are a few kinky examples.
- Spanking (as I explained above).
- Pinching,
- Slapping.
- Punching.
- Electric shocks.
- Squeezing sensitive areas.
- Using nipple clamps.
- “Forcing” your partner into stress positions. These 17 bondage positions are perfect for this.
- Forcing your partner to wear a gag for prolonged periods.
Some Notes on Sadism & Masochism
Just like with introducing degradation & humiliation into your relationship, you need to observe some rules to make sure both you and your partner have a good time.
Most important is communication, giving each other feedback and incorporating these feedback into future kinky sex session, especially the first few times you explore it.
This also means having a well understood safe word in case things get out of control. Having a ball you can drop if you a gagged is also important.
Finally, my advice is to start slow and gradually increase the intensity of your sadism & masochism play so that you reach a level that satisfies him and you without risking a nasty incident or accident.
The BDSM how to has lots more great info on sadism & masochism.
14. Use Your Words, The Right Way To Talk Dirty
Talking dirty is such a powerful and flexible way to make sex kinkier and more exciting. While you can jump into the Dirty Talking Guide to learn everything from how to talk dirty to 100s of example lines you can use on your man in every situation, here are some ways you can use it to make sex kinkier.
Intensify The Experience
During the act, you don’t need to say much, but as he’s getting closer and closer to cumming, you can start moaning and using a few words to intensify the feeling for your man. Here are a few examples:
- “Yes” “Yeah” “Yes baby”
- “Mmmmmmmmm” “Ooooooooooo”
- “I’m going to cum” “You’re going to make me cum”
- “Just like that, just like that”
If you’re looking for more dirty things to say to your man, literally hundreds, then you’ll find them in the Dirty Talking Guide.
Amp Him Up
Another great way to talk dirty to your man is to build sexual tension and get him amped up and excited before you get down to business. Here are a few examples:
- Try whispering this in his ear, when you are out with him, “How long more until we go home? I’m too horny to be out in public. I need you inside me.”
- Before you call over to his one evening, try sending him a sexy message like this, “Can’t wait to see you later! It’s been hard to concentrate at work. All I’ve been thinking about is making you cum in my mouth later. Can’t wait x”
- As you’re leaving for work, kiss him goodbye, then whisper this in his ear before leaving, “I can’t wait to get back from work so I can give you a little oral action.” He will be gobsmacked and thinking about you all day.
This is just the tip of the iceberg, you can find more powerful ideas for sexting your man here.
15. Involve Other People (Swinging & More)
One kinky idea, that’s not for everyone is getting other people involved in your sexy times. There are multiple ways to do this…
Threesomes – Threesomes are one of men’s most popular fantasies and the idea of a threesome is reasonably popular with many women too. However, it’s important to keep in mind the difference between the fantasy and reality.
The fantasy is having incredible sex with two other people at the same time, while the reality can involve a lot more emotions than you initially expected…I’m talking about jealousy, fear, and insecurity.
So if you’re planning a threesome with your boo, make sure to think about these potentially negative emotions AND discuss it first before diving in. Also, make sure to use some great threesome positions.
Swinging – Swinging can involve threesomes, but it’s really a lifestyle of non-monogamy, where sex can happen outside the relationship in many different ways, whether it’s a one night stand, an ongoing affair or even visiting a sex club together.
In other words, swingers are committed to each other romantically but have sex with other people.
For some couples, this can be super hot and crazy kinky and bring them closer together, while it can be a disaster for other couples. As with all intimate matters, good communication skills are crucial to making swinging work.
Voyeurism – Voyeurism is another kinky way to involve other people in your sex life. You may enjoy watching your partner getting intimate with others, or you may enjoy people watching you. Just make sure everyone is consenting and you’re not breaking any laws!
More Ideas – This is just an introduction to involving other people in your sex life, but in truth, I haven’t even begun to scratch the surface of what’s possible. Here are some ideas for you to research:
- Cuckolding/being a cuckqueen
- Polyamory
- Open relationships
- Sex clubs
16. Public Play
Public play is doing anything that turns you on and gets you off while you’re in a public place. It doesn’t even have to be particularly wild. I’m talking about things as simple as:
- Wearing a skirt with no panties.
- Wearing a sex toy, like a butt plug
- Not wearing a bra under your top.
Of course, you can go further and include sex acts like fingering (learn how to finger yourself in this post), giving a hand job (hand job tips here), dry humping, or even sex itself if the above ideas aren’t kinky enough for you.
Public play doesn’t necessarily mean you have to be walking down the street. It also refers to:
- Making a homemade sex tape or streaming yourself on a webcam for others to see.
- Posting images of yourself online for others to see.
You may already know this, but I’m going to repeat it anyway:
The most important thing with all public play is to make sure you don’t break the law.
17. Roleplaying
Ever fantasized about being with a fireman? What about being disciplined by a headmaster? How about being the sexy secretary for a high powered boss?
This is the whole point of roleplaying, you get to act out your fantasies and stay in control, what’s kinkier than that? Here are a few standard roleplaying ideas that will hopefully inspire you.
- Getting blackmailed.
- Being “forced” into having sex.
- Repaying a debt with sexual favors.
- Being a porn star, stripper or a call girl.
- Being a masseuse that does whatever gets the job finished.
- Having your innocence corrupted by someone more experienced…or being the corrupter yourself.
- Strangers at a bar.
- Swimming instructor who is a little too grabby, leading to sex in the water…just make sure you’re in a private pool.
- Pretending to be someone famous or pretending to be with someone famous.
- Being a bored housewife or househusband.
- You or your man being in an authority position like a fireman, cop, doctor, the UPS guy, crooked lawyer, professor, coach, slave owner, etc.
- You or your man in submissive positions like being a criminal, student, intern, slave, etc.
These are all just examples to get your creative juices flowing. You’ll have your own specific fantasies that you’ll want to act out with your man, so make sure to focus on YOUR fantasies, not just the ones here.
Finally, it’s important to understand that pretending to be a stripper, while your man is a customer may feel a bit awkward and staged. This is true for any roleplaying scenario and it’s is perfectly fine, just make sure that you can both laugh at the silliness of it all and enjoy yourself.
18. Unleashing The Animal
Unleashing the animal is all about having passionate, animalistic sex where you are completely lost in the moment with your man. I’m talking about:
- Not thinking about tomorrow’s chores.
- Not worrying about your job or finances or what someone said to you last week.
- Your complete and full attention on your partner and his attention on you.
- Just him taking you with every ounce of his being, while you whisper things you never thought you’d say in his ear.
In other words, losing all your inhibitions and just being in the moment.
This all sounds incredibly hot, fun and easy, but in reality unleashing the animal and having this kind of intensely passionate and wild sex is hard and often unpredictable.
Here are a few ways to make it easier.
Remove The Obstacles
The biggest factor when it comes to unleashing the animal is removing obstacles in your way. These are things like:
- Stress from looking after your family (Solution: Get a nanny for a few hours per week to help if you have kids).
- Stress from overworking (Solution: Cut down work if possible or try to give yourself one day a week where you aren’t going to be too stressed at work)
- Having low energy (Solution: Start working out & eating healthy).
- Fixing his low sex drive (Solution: Get him to talk to his doctor and potentially start hormone replacement therapy).
According to a pair of sex researchers, sex drive is affected both by things that make us want sex (accelerators) and the obstacles like those listed above (brakes) [1, 2]. We each have our own brakes and accelerators. Learn
Build Sexual Tension
Next, is making sure to build sexual tension with your man. This is that feeling of energy and electricity between the two of you.
Rather than repeating myself on how to build sexual tension, check out the sexual tension guide here for strategies on building sexual tension between yourself and your man to insane heights.
New Locations & Situations
Ever notice how having sex on your vacation is a lot easier and more fun? That’s the power of being in a new situation or location with your man.
You are out of your normal reality which makes it easier to start having more passionate sex. It can almost act like a “reset” button for your sex life.
A Drink Or A Smoke
Some find that having a drink or two lets them loosen up and let go. Others also find that smoking some marijuana has the same effect (of course, make sure that it’s legal in your area first).
However, overdoing alcohol or marijuana can be a recipe for disaster.
Related: 22 fun couples drinking games.
19. Compliment His Adventurousness
As I mentioned at the beginning of this guide, good communication is key to ensuring that both of you are enjoying yourselves and are getting what you want from your sex life.
However, directly asking for what you want can sometimes be awkward or even worse: it can cause your man to clam up and become defensive (that’s right, many men have very sensitive egos!). This can be a catastrophe if you want to try new things with him.
So, if guys can be really sensitive and awkward when it comes to talking about sex, what’s the solution? What’s the best way to make him more open?
A great way to keep your man open to new ideas and exploring with you is to compliment his adventurousness.
The best way to do this is to send him a message after a fun night together like the one in the above example, “Last night amazing. I love how adventurous you are in the bedroom!”
You should try sending this message, EVEN if he’s not particularly adventurous.
Massaging a man’s ego with a message like this has a very interesting effect. Most guys will want to live up to your compliments and will actually become more adventurous over time.
And if your man is already adventurous, you should still compliment him for it, to reinforce it. By the way, texting isn’t the only way to do this, make sure to compliment him when you are together too.
Bottom line, complimenting your man on his adventurousness and kinkiness is a great way to make him keen on trying new things with you.
20. A More Indirect Approach
If you currently find it tricky to talk about sex with your man or if he clams up anytime you suggest trying something new, then you may want to take a more indirect approach
One way to be indirect is by leaving a sex book where you know he will find it. Then, if he brings it up, you can ask what he thinks or if there is anything that he’d like to try from it. You can also try reading it together and then discussing what may be fun.
21. Watch Porn Together
Another is to ask him if he’d like to watch some porn with you to see if there are some ideas you can try together.
Lots of guys will love this idea, while others may be a bit hesitant.
If your man is hesitant, then the key to making your porn viewing comfortable is taking control and choosing what to watch. If you hesitate or insist on your man choosing what to watch, it can get awkward quite quickly. However if you choose what to watch without lots of deliberation, it will be a lot smoother and enjoyable for both of you.
Of course, if he is very eager to show you his favorite porn, then make let him lead the way.
As you browse from video to video together, you can talk to your man about it and ask him questions like:
- That position looks interesting, do you want to try it?
- I love how submissive she is in this one, I wonder what submitting to you would be like?
- Maybe I should wear something like that the next time we have sex, what do you think?
22. Safe Words!
I’ve already mentioned this before, but I really can’t stress it enough.
Safe words are mandatory if you are engaging in any kinky sex activities where you have the potential to hurt yourself or your partner. Rather than repeating myself, you should read this section on using a safe word correctly.
23. Even Kinkier Sex
This Kinky Sex Guide is just scratching the surface of what’s possible when it comes to having hotter, more enjoyable and freakier sex.
But there is still a lot to learn and try, and that’s why we put together the Kinky Sex List as well as these 40 sexy and freaky things to do with your guy.
Of course, you’ll also find some incredible ways to have more enjoyable and intense sex in my private and discreet Bad Girls Bible newsletter.
How to Be Kinkier
So far, you’ve got some great kinky examples. But if you still want to know more about how to be kinky or bring kink into the bedroom, we’ve got a few additional thoughts.
Kinky media – Expose yourself to kinky things in media. Books, porn, podcasts, and other sources can all teach you about new kinks to try or ways to make your favorite sexy activities kinkier!
Open up – Don’t be afraid to open up to your partner. Although you do not need a partner to do lots of kinky things, you might become unsatisfied with your sex life and resentful if there’s something you really want to do and you don’t get that chance.
Sure, your partner might not love every kink you try as a couple, but you might discover they’ve got a few things on their sexual to-do list, too!
In fact…
Sex researcher Justin Lehmiller has found some kinky fantasies are incredibly common. BDSM, for example, was a fantasy for over 90% of men and women each, and over two-thirds of men and women have fantasies about taboo sex [3]. And when he asked participants about sharing their fantasies, only 15% of them experienced a negative response from their partners!
Related: The 10 Most Common Sexual Fantasies
Create what is the ideal safe space for you to explore kinks – As we mentioned above, you don’t need a partner to learn how to be kinky. You can try self-bondage, spank or paddle yourself, use blindfolds or ballgags, torture your own nipples, or dress up in kinky costumes… just to name a few things. Remember to keep safety in mind, however, if no one is around to help in case of an emergency.
Don’t be afraid to push your boundaries – In BDSM, boundaries are often referred to as limits and there are hard limits, which you’ll never cross, and soft limits that you can push against and potentially cross. If some kinks for couples sound unappealing, consider why you feel that way. And if you’re ready to push those boundaries, slowly get closer to them and give yourself time to get comfortable before going further.
Create space & time – Make sure to give yourself and your partner space to share your own kinky fantasies and figure out what kinky sex is to you. Give yourself time to talk about your feelings before, during, and after trying a kink (remember, communication is essential to all kinds of sex). Share your worries, hopes, and any information that can make the experience better.
Hint: a lot of the techniques on Bad Girls Bible are not only excellent conversation starters, but include relevant safety information to make sure you feel safe and relaxed enough to get kinky!
Creating a safe space to try kink also means giving yourself and your partner enough time to process your feelings, which might be complex and uncomfortable. One of you might view things more negatively than the other. Or you might not have enjoyed a kink even though it was one of your fantasies.
Avoid obsession – Finally, try not to obsess over (always) doing kinky things. It’s easy to view kinky sex as better than vanilla sex. But unless you absolutely need kink to enjoy sex or get off, there’s a time and place for both. And if you focus too much on kinks to try, your sex life can become goal-oriented, or you could even make your partner feel like they’re not good enough. Just like with ice cream, vanilla is still enjoyable!
Conclusion: The Road To Kinkier Sex
I hope that all the kinky ideas, tips, and games above have taught you what kinky sex is and will get you and your boo having more intense and enjoyable sex. If you have any kinky sex ideas that you would like to share with the Bad Girls Bible community, please add them to the comments section below or send them to me in an email.
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In fact...
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Even if you currently struggle to orgasm during sex or while masturbating, this process will also work for you.
And best of all, you don’t need to do anything weird or uncomfortable to start having the best orgasms and sex of your life.
I’m a 28yo guy and i’ve always wanted to be handcuffed to a bed naked and gagged while an older woman s*cks/w*nks me off before riding me. She can then f**k me for as long as she like because i can’t stop her and can’t tell her to stop either.
Good to know what you like!
I’m an older woman who loves younger men & who loves doing this!!!! But I wish more guys would just come out and say hat they want instead of me having to be the teach!! Thanks for being honest cause it’s nice to hear what younger guys want!
I am a natural sub…. I am an older woman who is a part time pet-kitten/slave and personally, although not younger nor a guy, subs just want someone to take control,,,, just work out first what the “no go” zones are, and then do whatever makes you happy,… a natural sub will enjoy that!!! The pleasure is in giving to the dom what they enjoy… that is why it is important to work out what they wont do first, then, all power to you…(no pun intended, lol) but go have your fun…..if the person is a sub, they will enjoy this along with you….the giving control and pleasure to their dominant…..
Well wut i want is for a girl to give me a blowjob without hesetstion n enjoy tha shit out of it n not complain bout tha pre cum
Who complains about pre cum? It lets you know that the full loads is not too far away…
I would love to have a Woman swallow my load. I’ve had them get me to that point and then stop. I want to be sucked dry. This may be too much to ask.
Not too much to ask. With the right partner, sucking your man dry and swallowing every drop is how the perfect blow job should end.
You simply haven’t found the right girl.
I make love to my man’s cock. He loves to hold my hair tightly as I deep throat it. He loves it and is totally unable to move when I’m done. Cum taste great! I suck him dry. We love to talk dirty, it’s great!! Then an hour or so later, we have awesome sex for hours…Both of us are always totally satisfied!!
That’s cool
I feel you bro. When precums start to come out, she stopped blowing and saying it is disgusting.
Yes I feel the same…. when the precums starts I can’t blow him… feel disgusting can’t continue.. he feels incomplete
That shouldn’t be a stopping point. That lets you know when he is close. Plus that’s saying your enjoying it. Personally I love giving blow jobs, if I get to completion with him I swallow. I figure what I give I will get in return.
I love pre cum and cum
Oh that would be me!!! I love sucking cock, licking out that precum with my tongue in your hole and swallowing all that yummy cum
I def don’t mind the pre-cum as I swallow all of my man’s cum.
Yes!
I want to find an older woman who will take full control of me and make me very obedient
Well Damn!???
Well I feel when cum go in my mouth it’s amazing !!
This is a great article. We do almost everything mentioned above. I want to take it to the next level. Suspension would be fun (I think). I feel our Sex life is getting boring so the next step is the best.
Some fabulous ideas here… Especially like being the one in control. Hmm… may have to explore this in more depth.
do you have any advice for men to talk dirty to a girl
Anything in another language!!! It doesn’t matter what u say, any things hot if its whispered in your ear and the height of passion!!
Hi, I am an older woman, and from my experience dirty talk is great in the heat of the passion, but unless you both know each other extremely well, it can also lead to a slap if the wrong thing is said…My advice would be, make it all about her, and make her feel special…. you can use degrading dirty talk and still make this possible…Instead of just blurting out something like “you love c**ck don’t you, you dirty little sl*t” try something like “Do you love my c**ck hitting you hard, your mine, and only my dirty little s**t”…if you want to use degrading dirty talk, make her feel like you worship her and her body for it, do not talk to her like she is a common crack wh**e, and this should be a great help to you…..”Daddy’s special little f**k toy” will get a better response than just “Hey, you little f**k toy”.
Can’t ever going wrong starting off with, “wow,I had the hottest dream about you last night.” Works on almost anyone and its leaves you wide open to take it anywhere you want depending on who she is
Ask questions, like “is that good” or “you feel good baby?” “You like my cock deep in you?” It makes the girl feel safe/thought of
Thank you Sean… THANK YOU THANK YOU THANK YOU
My boyfriend and I recently started doing some kinky stuff.. he has started choking me, and oddly I loved it! I do suggest a “safe word” for sure, as I nearly passed out last night and he had no idea. But the orgasm was freaking amazing!
Hi,
Being safe is the most important thing. Passing out is definitely not safe. So make sure that you have a safe word AND a simple ‘safe action’ so that your man knows when you’ve had enough, feel in danger or want him to stop.
Sean
I’ve recently found out I enjoy this too but you also need a sign, like a tap in his hand, invade you can’t talk or to loosen his grip a bit.
Hi, I am a pet/slave and I also adore choking, but…..safe words wont help in this situation….its almost impossible to utter a safe word while going hard at it and choking at the same time…. I suggest you keep an eye out for symptoms, like tinny hearing, and numb lips…. once you learn what the symptoms are before you are going to have issues, then use some kind of physical signal, like tweak his left nipple or something… but while learning those limits, take it easy… choking, although freakingly amazing, is also very dangerous if not done safely….
I just started getting turned on by being dominant with my girl. And it turns out my girl loves being a sub. It gets her really wet, which gives me lots to eat. A win win. She loves when I pretend to choke her. With one hand on her neck and eating her out at the same time, she does a full on convulse and has an amazing orgasm. Than she can’t wait for me to release my seed deep in her throat. After a big gulp she lays back and enjoys the feeling of what just happened.
Love the wrestling part, kind of like a rape fantasy. That’s another one, coming in at night, being gagged by his hand, telling you to be quiet, and then having his way with you.
Ahhh now we are talking about taboo kind of kinky.
Daddy likes!
Great read. Very well written article!!
Let this like new non dating nor promiscuous, tight pussy,(,my hubby didn’t touch me for,10years, now divorced I started masturbating last month and I squirted, I don’t like fucking different people and I don’t want a relationship, but I’ve discovered that I love sex and I am eager to find out what I like. I definitely like to know I am pleasing my partner. I don’t like to be hit on and I don’t want to catch feeling s but I need dick in my life my tight barely used pussy needs action. I just had a friend teach me to suck dick. I love making them cum and I want to behave like a bitch. And I need to find out what else I enjoy. I need a partner that can be flexible with techniques and when I know he is pleased, I cum and orgasm when a dick is in my mouth. I just don’t know how to find a partner. I cum when I know he is pleased. 40 yrs old and horny as fuck!”
There’s tons of places where you can do hookups online, but that will only sate your desire for a little bit. It’s really just about finding the right person. I got lucky with my high school sweetheart, by that doesn’t mean that everyone is that way. Take your time and find the right one, you’ll get there.
I’m 40 as well and I recently divorced my wife after 21 years so I am in same boat I need pussy in my face
Where do u live lol?
Good for you! You are giving me some hope. I’ve been married 26 years and going through hard times in my marriage. We don’t have much sex anymore. It could be 2 to 3 months … and I’m 49 horny as hell lol… anyway I’m dying to get out there once my divorce is finalized.
Yummy sounds like a damn good time to me 😉
Wow, you sound like a dream for any man. Keep searching, I’m more than positive some man will find you and realize the gold mine he has found!
Love the article! Looking fro some help….I have been a vanilla girl for a loooong time and I am now burting out my shell and wanting to try new things…..the problem I am having is my awful lack of imagination when it comes to scenarios I want to try….can anyone help me!? I know I want some outdooor and public fun….and I’ve being trying restraints and toys…but feels like something is missing from them….all pointers gratefully received xxx
Sometimes you need a man that’s really bold, like mine. We went to Comic-Con and went to sit down because my feet hurt from walking. We started kissing, then making out, and by the end of it I was about to climax and begging for more. It also really helps to tell your man what you want to try, to give him the chance to take his own initiative. Being honest and open can really be freeing, but you have to trust your partner a lot. I hope this helps! 🙂
While you were dressed as Sheldon and Captain Kirk? Lol awsome
I used to be a bit of a vanilla girl as well but as I got older and started exploring a bit of kinkyness I love it! Be patient with yourself and your partner cause he’s getting used to this new girl as well!! I’ve found as times goes I’m more open to things I never would have in the past! You’ll learn what really excited you!! I do find it a bit embarrassing to bring up to my man so I’ll send him an article, like this one, or a video of what I want! I’ve never had a complaint!! Be sure to have a safe work or sign, in case u any talk!! Enjoy and have fun!!!! There’s nothing wrong w being a bit freaky!!!
Tell him to meet you at your local sex shop and pick a dressing room you’ll already be in. Let him pick out what ever he wants you dressed in or extras he wants before he sneaks in and demands you wear, act and do whatever he says. There’s usually lots of mirrors to watch as he has his way with you while you’re not allowed to talk or make a sound. After he’s finished don’t move and let him slip out almost like he’s a stranger who’s in complete control
FuuuuuuuuuuN 🙂
Sooooooo going to be a good night for my.boyfriend …..
# Surprise x
I can say this my wife sucks some of the best dick ever … We been together 12 years just recently into sharing and swinging and wen she sucks the mans dick you can see the soul leave their body we even had hisbands pay its crazy there has been 2 jealous wives but wem that happens i paralyze the pussy and everythings good im like 8 na half we have vids to share
What can I text to my man throughout the day to make him go crazy and constantly keep thinking about me?
Check out this article for some examples.
Sorry meant briefcase:) be creative!!
I like to randomly put a sexy photo in his bread case or lunch. Or out in a sexy note about what I’m going to do to him when he gets home, or what I want him to do to me!
I love kinky sex it turns me on everytime
All I need to do is touch my guys ears and its over. Amazing erotic zone he’s got.
You mentioned public play, but you don’t mention places where this would be “acceptable”. We both have this fantasy where we make love in front of a watching audience and would love to know how to make this possible.
You may want to try a swingers club for this.
you can try registering at a webcam modelling site…. you then also have the option of blocking certain countries or areas which you don’t want to be viewed by, but they do have rules, make sure you understand them first,, and also if both of you are to appear on camera, then register youselves as a couple, everyone appearing on camera must do this or your account will be cancelled…you could even find yourself being paid for having your own fun!!! Just a side perk of doing what you enjoy.. this is what I do….you can do this from the privacy and comfort of your own home, wear whatever makes you feel comfortable, and not run the risk of getting arrested or finding yourself in an embarrassing situation,
Hi, I am a 30 something yr old kitten… I subscribed to your articles only about 5 months or so ago, and found that a lot of what you were writing, I had already considered, but it was great to finally see an article directed specifically at my choice in lifestyle… I am a part time pet, and my Master… well he is online as he lives overseas, so… cybersex and masturbation is a huge part of our relationship although I must stress that BDSM is not just about the sex, but the control and power play….I do the whole kitten experience, collar, leash, ears, tail, lingerie… and public sex is also a huge part of our lifestyle choice… so much so, that I am now an online web cam model and he watches me via Skype while I perform for viewers, and I am very much submissive and very much into the whole obedience thing….but although I now have a decent fan base online while streaming, I feel I am finding it harder and harder to keep my Masters attentions, and do not know what to do here,,,it is a hard situation as he is also a vouyer so I often don’t get to see him or his reactions to what I am doing… I just know he likes, as he would not come back for more if he didn’t, lol… part of his kink is not telling me what he has seen or what he enjoys, he likes to keep his camera off, so I am becoming at a loss as to what I may try to draw him back to me, as lately it has been more about him just watching than actually playing or participating with his kitten….he has even stopped training and has pretty much been leaving that to other viewers online with their requests, and the only rules he has bothered to set for me are no skyping with anyone else…Skype is only for him, although contact and cybersex with complete strangers online while streaming is fine, he watches with cam off, and often falls asleep during this… he loves the idea of sharing me this way, but of course cannot stand selfishness or greediness as he calls it if a viewer becomes possessive of me or wants to try and claim me…. sometimes to me it seems he is not interested, but wont let go of me… I don’t understand, he wont answer those questions directly when all I want is my dominating, controlling, demanding Master back…. he tells me he is happy and doesn’t want this to end, and im pretty sure there is no one else just by the amount of time he spends online with me, and that I can view how many Skype contacts he has, and there are not many plus the number has not gone up….he is a man of few words, but I adore him, as we are now going into our 6th month online which apparently is long for cyber relationships… I wouldn’t even know that, he is my first….Please help with any suggestions…I would be gratefull always
Hi Kate, it’s really tough to give you advice here as you know your own relationship a lot better than I do. My advice would be to talk to him to figure how you both can get the most out of the relationship.
Nothing turns my man in more than breaking out the camera to take stills a and videos of me, and directing me on what he wants me to do. He actually was a porn director for a brief time several years ago, lol.
Hi Sean,
Nice article; I’ve done most of the stuff you’ve listed, and there’s so much more that I just learnt from it too. I’m interested in public sex, like sex in front of people, but I don’t know how to initiate that to happenw ithout making it awkward.
Same here. My gf and I have left sex tapes out so people “accidentally” see them but that’s not really all that exciting. We would like to find 2-5 people to start but eventually a large crowd surrounding us and touching us would be amazing almost like live art. Preferably even where they could take turns spanking and inserting dildos in her 3 holes as I direct eventually but yes, how do we start. We’re also dying to have group sex threesome at first (she only wants another female which is fine by me) and eventually as many as possible. One issue is that we are picky… Please help or come join 😉
So I have never really tried kinky stuff but definitely want to. The whole wrestling thing sounds like tons of fun, but I have both dominant and submissive aspects to my personality and am not sure how that would work. Any theories?
Try it out and see if you enjoy it.
Sex in a car? Lame… Nothing like getting your guy totally aroused while riding with a group of bikers on a poker run… Makes a quick stop well worth it. My man absolutely loves it!!
This is something that we have been wanting to maybe try thanks so much for all of this information now we are going to he trying this now I hope you keep information coming to us
Do you have any information on women doing there husband with a strapon because that sounds interesting to thank you for your information
Yep, check out our pegging guide here for all you need to know.
Hi Sean
My partner is much older than me and has lost his drive. To be really honest, sex was never what held us together and I feel we are somehow “mismatched” in the bedroom. Outside of the bedroom we have a great relationship, share two children and a happy functional home life. We’re a great partnership, but have never had great sexual chemistry.
We have talked a lot about my sexual frustration, but he refuses to budge or see his doctor. Instead, he is encouraging me to pursue my sexual desires with other men. He claims not to feel jealous but “just wants me to be happy.” He says its up to me whether I tell him of my “extra-curricular” activities or not.
I’m sure he’s never heard of a Wittol (a man who is aware and supportive of his wife’s infidelity), a term I have only just discovered today. But I wonder how many Wittols there are out there? and do you have any tips for me to make sure I’m not going to ruin my relationship by exploring this new possibility?
The idea of having a kinky alter-ego excites me greatly, but I do not want to hurt my man’s feelings or emasculate him.
You’re man may have low testosterone which a doctor can help to fix.
Sounds like you need to be quite careful here with the wittol concept. You may find that it’s better to dip your toe in the water and test your man’s reaction AND let him know all of this beforehand and afterwards. The idea in his head may be very different to real life. So what could you do to dip your toe in the water?
You could start with simply flirting with a guy the next time you are at a bar and see how your man reacts to it.
If he’s comfortable with you flirting with another man, then you can try going a little further the next time and again see how your man reacts to that.
Please keep in mind, these are merely suggestions. Ultimately, you know your relationship with your man a lot better than I do.
I feel this is well put together walk through, I loved the cautionary comments which are sincere and valid. Plus the perspective from the female. ( quite a turn on in itself that for me – Male) More power to your elbow and any other parts of your anatomy that require such!
Great comments from Author.
My GF and I love everything but don’t involve other people, as we don’t believe there’s anything positive in this in a committed loving relationship
we do love outdoor and risky sex especially in Cars park near people like car parks, and recently after we both finished a massage in a same room.. She quickly present her ass to me which I quickly pumped full of cum in about 5 minutes before the massage therapist came back.. Then when we got to the car I continue pumping her ass with my cum making it feel amazing.. We felt that was pretty kinky ?
I’m just recently divorced and the guy I’m seeing now is so open to anything I want to try and he even suggest things as well. He even loves it because I’m a very dominant female. He truly loves it when I’m in control. Sean you’ve given me a lot of ideas on how to blow your mans mind with a blow job but one thing after reading all your books and getting your news letters. My man will tell you that if you ever have a girl give you a blow job without teeth is the most mind blowing way to get a blowjob. Believe me when I say that I don’t worry bc I know what he really likes. So just to offer the info research men getting blowjobs by women that wear dentures. Every women should experience this simply due to the feeling of a dick in your mouth without teeth you actually get to feel what it really feels like. You feel every pulse vein ripple and the room in your mouth to truly satisfy him is jusr as mind blowing for you. I can honestly say I hated giving blowjobs until I did it with my dentures out. I enjoy it just as much as he does. The feel of his dick in my mouth is so erotic to me and turns me on more than him going down on me. Call me crazy but all men deserve and need to have a low job without teeth.
I really like kinky things like piss play but i dont know how to seduce my wife in this kind of kinky way and what about you guys i mean piss play is narmal or i have some brain problem any help will be appriciated
Just tell her next time she takes a piss not to wipe, and you want to lick her pussy clean. Ask her for photos of her pissing? She can get comfortable with you finding her desirable even when she’s pissy. It’s a mind thing, let her in on your desires and I bet you’ll be in those wet panties soon!
Who’s single?…I love eating a woman out, nothing excites me more than seen her lose control while I go down on her, seeing her back arch from pleasure and watching her toes curl!!
My boyfriend and I have been together for 11 months & only had sex once. I always use to give him a blow job every morning before work cuz I love satisfying my man. I stopped because he would never do anything to please me. It wasn’t to big of a deal in the beginning in the relationship but now it’s becoming a serious issue because he still watches porn but does not have sex with me.
He’s a couple years older than me & watches a lot of porn about MILFS and older women.
He says I need to turn him on & put on a show I want to try something kinky but Im scared since he’s constantly turning me down for sex.
I’m thinking of going to the sex store & getting something kinky to do. Do you think that will help???
ANY ADVICE WOULD BE GREAT!!!
Sounds like you need to have a chat with him to let him know what you need from the relationship.
my husband wants me to squirt but idk if i actually know how…. any tips
The Squirting Guide is what you need 😉
What can I do to my nipples to make me squirt?
Check out the guide on nipple play for that 😉
I want tips on how to deepthroat, I’ve been wanting to try it on my partner but I’ve been so scared, I have a sensitive gag reflex. And what are some tips I can pass on to my man so that he can make me squirt because I’ve only squirted once but we couldn’t manage to do it again.
Check out the guide on how to deep throat without gagging 🙂
I’m only 20 and my husband is 33. But my sex drive is off the charts!! And his is so low. I’ve tried so many different techniques and try introducing new ideas but nothing is working. The past couple times we’ve had sex me or him doesn’t cum because he goes limp in the middle of it. I’ve tried being sexy, I don’t let it get me down when he does and I try going down on him to get him back up but even that doesn’t work. Plus we’ve got him on enhancement pills and it’s doing NOTHING! What more can I do!?!?
He may want to consider talking to his doctor
I am a 19-year-old woman and submissive by nature. I am afraid of pain, and yet I am willing to submit to extremely severe pain for about 60 minutes if it will bring my boyfriend pleasure, which in turn brings me satisfaction. In a typical scenario, he will use my torn nylons to tie my wrists tightly to the headboard of a bed. Then, he will twist my nipples, bite my clit, fist-fuck my pussy, finger-fuck my asshole, whip my buttocks and thighs with a belt, fuck me anally and vaginally back and forth, fuck my throat until I have puked at least a dozen times and he has cum several times, and piss down my throat in order to fill my stomach.
My wife and I have been together for about 22 years, at the inception of our relationship we had sex maybe 3 or 4 times a day. After about a year we moved in together and our sex lives took a huge nose dive. From sex multiple times daily to a Saturday evening or Sunday morning so effectively just once a week. Before getting together with my wife I had multiple sex partners and would at times have sex with 2 woman on the same day. I have addressed this with my wife for years the situation would improve for a few weeks then revert to the once weekly romp. I tried everything bought vibrators, blindfold, restraints, handcuffs, tons of pairs of lingerie, costumes, etc and we don’t use these. When I do make a move she is either tired or has work to do. A bit of back ground is that I do all the cooking, we share the cleaning and taking care of our kid, we work similar hours yet she has always seemed not interested. We have done every position possible and penetrative sex in all openings. About 6 years ago I made the moves on her the next day after our weekly sex and she said that we just had sex, I became aggressively annoyed and told her that I will get it elswhere(never cheated on her in all our time together). I made the decision to stop exercising and following a healthy diet so to bring my libido in line with my wife’s but it has become worse. It can 2 or 3 weeks without us being intimate and now I am at my witts end. I have decided to return to working out and eating healthily to improve myself and confidence so I become attractive to women again. I don’t want to divorce my wife so I have now opted to cheat. Is there some way to get my wife’s libido up and improve our sex lives so I don’t look elsewhere? Please help. I am 44 my lady is 43.
If she is 43, she is unlikely to develop a stronger libido now. But she also has stuck with the marriage for a long time. That suggests that she probably is more submissive than you realize. You need to take matters into your own hands. Be assertive and dominant. She will not like it, but in the end she will submit and comply as she lacks the will and self-esteem to do otherwise. First, you should restrain her hands. Maybe tie her wrists behind her back or to the headboard of a bed. Nothing brings a submissive wife back to compliance more effectively than deep anal sex on a regular basis. Maybe three times a week. If your neighbors might hear her moan or scream, use a ball gag and a tight scarf to muffle her before anal sex. Don’t use commercial lube. Just use your own saliva on her anus. That will be enough to bury your cock all the way up her asshole, balls deep. But it won’t reduce the friction, so you will be able to maximize her pain and to do so over a long period of time such as two or three hours, reaming out her rectum with long, powerful anal thrusts. She will moan and scream for the first 20 minutes. But, after that, her submissive nature will take over, and she will simply resign herself to servicing your needs.
I’m not sure if this is the best idea. Consent is key.
Wow!!!! I’m 28 and I’ve always wondered how to spice up sex. Now I know that there are so many ways to do this. But now how to find sub… I wont do online dating because to many scammers and really now a days could be dangerous. Thank for this article, I learned alot about different styles of kinky sex. I have to admit though the digging of the nails is one that I love.
My wife loves to watch me suck cocks. She tells all of her friends that I do it.
Thank you for this guide, and this entire website! It is so well put together and such a welcome change from the terrible lists all over the Internet offering no real insight and littered with ads!
I’ve been in a long term relationship for 4 years and love my partner, but have been nervous to talk about all the kinky things I want to do sexually. We’re both 28 so free from distractions of family life, but our sex life had become a bit unenthused and infrequent.
After reading this article and a few others I felt more confident, and wrote a list of my specific fantasies down. In order to ‘remove the brakes’ I walked the dog, cleaned the house, and set up a romantic setting with wine, candles etc. I sent some enticing texts throughout the day, and mentioned this guide and how it would be fun to read through together after work.
She came home and was stress free and horny as hoped, we had some wine and read the guide, discussed what we’d be up for, and I told her my dirtiest fantasies and all of which were well received… Even the freaky stuff.
The openness and setting made her considerably more confident in the bedroom and we ended up having the best sex of our lives so far. Earth shattering orgasm from oral on her with a vibrator to start (on my desk), anal play on me leaving a butt plug in after, then ass eating and anal sex to climax on her with plenty of dirty talk. She even squeezed my cum out of her ass afterwards as I mentioned it was particularly arousing for me…
Our sex lives have been reinvigorated and we are now on a journey of sexual exploration I’m so fucking excited for.
I’d also recommend the Spicer app to people, it let’s you choose yes, maybe, or no to hundreds of sexual ideas. You can link to your parter and ‘match’ what you’ve both selected a maybe or yes to. Takes out the awkwardness if it’s not so easy to talk directly to your partner about your desires… And gives plenty of good ideas.
Thanks again Sean, looking forward to reading the other articles!
Glad I could help!
I’m a massively hung married guy, love sharing my wife with other men, 250 different men have fucked her to date, she is stunning and cock mad, my turn on is watching much older hung men fuck her, I love sloppy seconds and eating their cum out of her.
I’m a professional dominatrix living with my submissive we’ve used your list to make cards where we pull a card its a great game and great ideas for surviving this coronas virus
Thrilled I could help!
Anal and oral are my favorite. I have vaginitis so I can’t do vaginal sex.
I have two submissives one called kitten and the second now wants her own name,I need a good name,please help
This girl who lives in the same apartment as I, I’ve had a crush on ever since I met her. I know she doesn’t like me back but she seems to return my affections and now I know why.
I haven’t had much of a sex life for the past couple years because of a bad relationship with my ex partner so I haven’t had much interest either until now.
I’m going to show her this site especially the kinky sex ideas page because I want to see if we have sexual chemistry and maybe she will get some enjoyment out of what she does to make ends meet.
Thanks Sean!
I’m a woman of nearly 40 years and my husband and I have been together for 15, in the beginning our sex life was phenomenal (I’m talking about breaking a solid bedframe good, the same as anyone else I suspect), but things have changed and he’s changed more in his proclivities than myself. His interest seem to be more inclined to #15 than anything else, and I recently found out that he has a history of experiences in that line (but never with me). How can I tell him I’m game if that’s what he wants?
You could suggest it to him. My advice is to start really slowly and dip your toe in the water before diving right in.
I let my husband tie me up to a table in our garage he also blind folded me. Only thing I did not like I had the feeling someone else saw me. I was face down and he spanked me very hard and pulled my hair the spanking was very painful but I liked it. The hair pulling I liked also. He called me some not good names like whore. He turned me on my back and bit my nipples really hard. My nipples are very sensitive. He slapped my face. He rammed his cock hard down my throat. He was screaming at me if his friends turn me on. I told him a name and he slapped me really hard. He was biting my nipples and he forced 4 fingers in my vagina. He rammed his cock all the way inside me and when hit my cervix I came so hard. Once he came he left me tied to the table and to my horror I heard his mom and fad walk in the garage and there was there daughter in law legs wide open semen running out and my body was beaten up. They want in the house and my husband untied me. I was sore.
These are great tips. Since I have permanent damage to my sexual ability from a stroke (an arterial shutdown) we use many kinky fun things to keep things as hot as possible in the bedroom. I’m fully recovered though I wish my loins knew that. We even use some toys including a chastity cage and vibrator. I’m not trying to be dirty here, just relating this. I always gave my wife oral sex over the years and no parts of her body are off limits. She’s still very attractive. One weekend she kicked me out to play golf because I had her so sensitive (in a good way) and exhausted she needed a break. Always be open to trying things. I’ll keep checking back.
Lol women don’t care about you or your sexual wants and desires. l am a very dominant male I usually have about 8 girls going at once and not a single one has ever asked if I enjoyed myself or how she could make it better. I’m always getting a rundown so I can understand her better. But women just lay there and I have to put them to work. It would be nice to have a girla round that cared but it won’t happen so please to all men stop wanting that and just take what you want
Hi Billy ! I agree with you. It’s quite true what you say….
Hi
Some women may care and some won’t care about sexual needs but my wife apparently does. I’m not dominant and she is. We have a great time. It works for us. If she gets pleasure from me wearing a chastity device I’m fine with it. We play a lot and enjoy it. I’m sure she’s getting her needs and desires met.
Often, Women find the role of Mistress to a male slave quite congenial, and are willing to let it remain in place most, or sometimes all, of the time. They may alternate it with cuddling and conventional coupling in equality, or trade off the role of Mistress for that of slave-girl to a powerful Master once in a while. The experiences of each arrangement can be quite fulfilling, in fact, and the variety is refreshing.
In the role of a slave, oral sex is a quite usual choice, with the slave-partner knelling before a Master or Mistress, seated on a bed or comfortable chair. This presents a perfect opportunity for the superior one to apply a whip to the kneeling slave’s back and posterior, Strokes of a whip or flogger (cat’o’nine-tails) can set up or change the rhythm of oral service, as well as reinforce the difference in status and authority. The mysterious connections between the pain of the whip and the pleasure of the genitals is a subject of considerable scientific study.
To make a thorough ceremony of it all, the slave may be required to crawl some distance — say, from the door of the room — to the Master’s or Mistress’s feet (shod or not), kiss them fervently, then work up to the position for cunnilingus or fellatio, begging for permission to bestow the act of adoration. (It is reported that the late Shah of Iran had harem slave girls creep under the bedcovers at the foot of his bed, kiss their way up his legs to suck him and await his pleasure for the night).
This humble correspondent has found great joy in lavishing submission and self-abasement on a beautiful Woman, and She seems to enjoy being a Goddess in the bedchamber.
I’m a fan of the noble art of dress draping, a simple but effective female technique.
My Lady simply stands close and drapes her dress over my head, giving me access to the wonderful world under a dress, with or without panties.
Works every time to get my interest.
My husband does not want the nice and slow. He will “tolerate” it but he wants to grab me by the hair, shove me down and have me bob up and down. Then he just wants me to deep throat and wants to thrust down my throat. That’s his ideal. Look at him? He always closes his eyes. Teasing? He gets irritated. Talking during a BJ? Nope. Using a hand on his shaft? Nope he wants it hands free. Kiss it? Nope he tells me my lips should be around it. Licking? Nope put it in your mouth.
Drives me crazy. He doesn’t want anything but exactly what he wants. I’ve discovered if I make it sound sloppy he likes that but that was trial and error
What about what you want? Have you talked to him about what you like, want and need to enjoy sex?
My man cannot fuck me unless I give a him good BJ beforehand, but stop at climaxing. This went on for a couple of years, and now I have made a deal that in return he will eat my pussy and make me orgasm at the same time. We now do 69ing and I love him to bite my pussy lips hard till it hurts a lot and I am sure to reach orgasm!! I hade several teeth marks on both the lips – feels and looks good
I’m a gay man who has sex with ‘straight’ men, I’m into S&M on a serious level but with the guys being ‘straight’ they don’t want anything to do with me sexually.
I’d love the guys to beat the shit out of me, I have the whip, the nipple clamps, the hand slapper device, the mouth gag, etc.
I like to have my balls abused as part of sex, but with the guys being ‘straight’ they are just aren’t interested.
I have put at least one day a week to beat myself and abuse my own balls, which does feel good, but it would be so hot if the ‘straight’ guys did it for me.
I would recommend S&M to everyone, it hurts, but it’s so good!