These 19 cuddling positions (with demonstrations!) will show you how to be deeply intimate with your partner whether you’re in bed, on the couch or even standing up.
As with all our sex tips on the Bad Girls Bible, make sure your partner freely and enthusiastically consents before you start cuddling them 🙂
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Now, let’s dive in and get cuddling and snuggling!
1. Spooning
Spooning is one of the best cuddling positions for a reason: it feels fantastic and involves a lot of skin-to-skin contact, creating maximum intimacy.
To get started, both of you need to lie on your side, facing the same direction, with the “big spoon” lying behind the “little spoon.” The big spoon then wraps their arms around the little spoon and pulls them close for a tight cuddle. There are many cuddling tips that the big spoon can use when wrapping their arms around the little spoon. They can:
- Grab their hips
- Wrap their arms around the little spoon’s waist
- Wrap their arms under the little spoon’s armpits and grab their shoulders
- Use their bottom arm as a pillow for the little spoon’s head, while using their top arm to hold the little spoon tightly.
- The big spoon can also intertwine their legs with the little spoon’s legs for extra cuddliness.
- Drape their legs over their partner’s hips
Common cuddling issue – A drawback of the Spooning position is that the big spoon’s arm closest to the bed can become trapped under the little spoon’s body, causing it to fall asleep and even go numb!
Solution – The big spoon can place a pillow between their arm and the little spoon’s body so that there is not so much pressure on it or place their arm up and under a pillow (cuddling pillows even exist for this reason!). If you’re limber, you might even be able to put your arm behind you.
Tease your partner – If you are the little spoon, then Spooning is a great way to tease your partner before sex. You can slowly grind back against your partners groin. Big spoons can reach around to fondle their partner’s breasts and nipples, breathe against their partner’s back/ear/neck (which can all be erogenous zones!), and press their chest to their partner’s back.
Go further – Alternatively, the big spoon can reach down and start fingering their partner if they have a vulva or give them a hand job if they have a penis.
Along with being a wonderful cuddling position for sleeping, Spooning is also a very intimate sex position.
2. Honeymoon Hug
The Honeymoon Hug is super-intimate for cuddling someone you love.
Both partners lie on their sides, facing each other. They then wrap their arms around each other’s necks/upper bodies and intertwine their legs.
You can pull yourself so close together that you can kiss each other in the Honeymoon Hug position.
In the Honeymoon Hug position, both partners will be hugging each other and can find that their bottom arms (the arms closest to the bed) are trapped under the weight of their partner’s body.
You can overcome this by stretching your arm overhead or by holding your arm in front of your chest, although this can feel a little awkward. Placing an arm under your partner’s neck may increase comfort.
Read: Our guide on having intimate sex
3. Smother
Have you ever used a weighted blanket? If you have, you know that amazing, heavy, comforting feeling they can give. There’s something about feeling pressed down that can help alleviate anxiety and just feel good.
That’s why the Smother feels so good. It’s just like cuddling with a weighted blanket, except…
Your partner is the weighted blanket!
All you need to do is lie down on your stomach. Your partner will then lie down on top of you, covering your body with theirs.
Naked – Being naked in the Smother position can lead to some very intimate and sensual cuddling with your partner. You can easily whisper into your partner’s ear if you’re on top.
Cuddling tip – The partner on top may need to support some of their weight on their arms/legs if they are a lot heavier than you. Make sure to let them know if it’s getting uncomfortable.
And…
After experiencing the feeling of your partner’s body on top of yours, swap and give your partner the same feeling you just experienced.
The Smother is also the perfect position for transitioning to Prone Bone or the Jockey sex position if things are getting hot and heavy!
4. Koala
The Koala is very similar to the Smother. The only difference is that the bottom partner will be lying on their back.
The top partner lies down on top of their partner, facing them and covering their body as much as possible.
One reason why this position is so intimate is that the top partner can rest their head on the chest of the bottom partner and listen to their heartbeat or trace their finger along their partner’s chest/breasts.
It’s also a great position for the top partner to get into the Cowgirl sex position when they are already on top of their partner.
5. Blanket Burrito
The Blanket Burrito is great snuggle position if you are sleeping in a cold room and have a large blanket.
While Spooning, hold each other tightly and wrap yourselves together into a human burrito using the blanket as your wrap.
This can feel super snuggly and intense if your room is truly cold, but…
If your room is already quite warm, the heat inside your Blanket Burrito will quickly become unbearable!
If you’re into BDSM, the Blanket Burrito is a great way to give your partner aftercare when you finish your session.
6. Half Spoon aka Cradling Your Sweetheart
If you are just learning how to cuddle, then you need to know about the Half Spoon, sometimes known as Cradling Your Sweetheart. One partner lies down on their back, facing the ceiling, while the other partner lies on their side, cuddling up against them.
The partner on their side can use the other partner’s armpit/shoulder area as a pillow and rest their top arm across their chest, like in the illustration above. The partner lying on their side can even wrap their legs around the other partner’s closest leg.
It’s also the perfect position for the partner lying on their side to start massaging the other partner’s balls or giving them some clitoral stimulation. It also works well for those who like grinding against thighs!
Psst, do you like grinding on your partner’s thigh? Check out the Thigh Tide sex position!
In the Half Spoon position, one issue that can arise is that the arm of the partner lying on their side (the arm closest to the bed) can become trapped under the body of the partner lying on their back, potentially making it go numb or getting sore.
As I’ve mentioned multiple times already, the partner lying on their side can place a pillow between their arm and their partners back to help dissipate and relieve the pressure. Or, the partner lying on their side, can move their head down slightly so it’s resting on the chest of the partner on their back.
7. Bear Hug
Cuddling in bed isn’t the only type of cuddling you can do. Some of the best and most meaningful cuddles are when you are both standing.
Feeling your partner wrap their arms around you in the Bear Hug and snuggle you tightly can feel incredible, especially if you are not feeling 100%. There are two main ways to cuddle while standing…
Face-to-face Bear Hug – In this case, you are both facing each other, making it easy to wrap your arms around each other like in the illustration above.
From behind Bear Hug – Your partner stands behind you and wraps their arms around you, pulling you close. The Bodyguard sex position is very easy to transition to after cuddling in this position.
8. Lounge Chair
The Lounge Chair is a great sitting cuddling position for watching TV together.
It’s usually better if the larger partner is at the back, supporting the smaller partner. The person at the back will start by sitting on the floor or on a cushion with their legs spread wide in front of them.
Then the smaller partner needs to sit down in the same position in front of them, so both of you are facing the same direction like in the illustration above. The big spoon can then wrap their hands around the little spoon, hugging them.
This position is far easier when the big spoon can rest their back against a wall for support.
This position can be great for building up to sex as the larger partner at the back can easily use a number of foreplay techniques to get them aroused and turned on.
9. Tetris Cuddle, aka The Perfect Couch Cuddling Position
The Tetris cuddle is the perfect cuddling position for couples lying on a couch. It’s both intimate and very comfortable.
Larger partner first – This position works best when the larger partner lies down on their back on the couch with their head propped up slightly at one end. They should be close to the front edge of the couch, so that there is space at the back of the couch for the smaller partner.
The larger partner must then raise their legs, creating some space on the couch where the smaller partner’s legs go.
Then the smaller partner – The smaller partner then lies down on their side, between their larger partner and the back of the couch.
The smaller partner, lying on their side needs to bend their knees and rest both legs down in the space created by the larger partner raising their legs. The larger partner can then lower their legs down on top of the smaller partner’s legs.
Finally, the smaller partner needs to adjust themselves so that they can comfortably rest their head on their larger partner’s chest.
This Tetris cuddle position is perfect for watching TV on the couch while cuddling.
However, like with all these cuddle positions, there is at least one drawback. For the smaller partner, lying on their side, their bottom arm (arm closest to the couch) can become trapped under their larger partner. And if your couch isn’t deep, this position might not work very well.
More couch positions: See demonstrations of 14 hot couch sex positions.
10. Lotus
The Lotus position is great when all you want to do is cuddle and feel your partner close to you. The Lotus position makes it difficult to do literally anything else. It’s also a great position for kissing your partner.
There is also a sexual cuddling position from tantric sex called Lotus or Yab-Yum.
Cuddling tip – Ideally, the larger or strong partner will start by sitting down.
11. Straddle
A slight variation of the Lotus position is the Straddle position, where you are literally straddling your partner while they are sitting on the couch.
As you can see from the demonstration above, they should be sitting down normally on the couch. Then you sit down on their lap, facing them, with your legs outside your partner’s.
Both partners can wrap their arms around each other for added intimacy. This position is also great if you want to initiate sex in the Mastery position.
12. Human Pillow
The Human Pillow is exactly as it sounds. It’s a cuddling technique, where you will be using your partner’s arm as your pillow. Simply rest your head on their arm and nod off.
You can see the woman in the illustration above with the green T-shirt sleeping on her side, using her partner’s arm as a pillow
The only drawback of this position is that your partner’s “pillow” arm can eventually go numb from the pressure of your head, so this is not usually a long term cuddling position for the whole night. However, if you snuggle in closer to your partner, so that your head is resting on their shoulder, it’s less likely to go numb.
13. Head on Lap
The Head on Lap cuddle position is exactly as it sounds:
You’ll be resting your head on your partner’s lap. It works best on a couch and is perfect for watching TV while getting comfy and close to your partner.
Your partner sits normally on the couch, while you lie on your side and rest your head on your seated partner’s lap. This one works extra well if the partner lying on their side likes having their head rubbed or hair played with.
While using one hand to rub your partner’s head, you can use your other hand to rub their crotch and get them hard.
But…
If you enjoy kinkier sex, then you can also try breastfeeding your partner in this position.
14. Head on Belly
The Head on Belly cuddling position works best when you have either a large bed or you are both lying down on a blanket. One partner lies down on their back. The second partner also lies down on their back, resting their head on the other partner’s hips or belly like in the illustration above.
Warning: If the partner who is acting as a pillow has issues/insecurities about their weight or stomach, you might want to avoid resting your head on it, if you’re not sure how they’ll react.
15. Leg Lattice
Another low-stress cuddling position for sleeping is the Leg Lattice. Instead of embracing your partner, you will rest your legs on theirs (or vice versa) while you sleep.
This cuddling technique works great if one of you sleeps on your belly and the other sleeps on your back.
16. Hand in Hand
Similar to the Courting cuddling position below is the Hand in Hand position. This is perfect if both partners prefer sleeping on their backs while cuddling.
You will simply be lying side by side, on your backs while holding hands. While it’s not a particularly sexy cuddling position and does not involve a lot of body contact, it means that you are less likely to disturb each other as you sleep.
It also means that you don’t have to worry about getting too hot while sleeping beside your boo.
However, you can increase contact by laying your leg over your partner’s leg.
17. Courting
The Courting position is another style of cuddling while sleeping that’s not super intimate, but it’s quite practical as there are no trapped arms to worry about for either partner.
To get into this position, you are both going to be facing each other while lying on your sides and holding hands. And that’s it. Optionally, you can bend your legs and easily change the distance between both of you if you find yourself getting too hot/cold.
18. Butt to Butt
The Butt to Butt cuddling position is a style of cuddling with even less physical contact.
You and your partner will be sleeping with your backs to each other, with your legs bent slightly so that you are sleeping Butt to Butt. You don’t necessarily need to be touching each other.
This position is great if you find yourself getting woken up by your partner’s movements, or you are a light sleeper who is easily disturbed, or you overheat in most cuddling positions.
Related: How to have pain-free anal sex.
19. Face to Face
For some people, any type of physical contact is too much stimulation when trying to sleep. It’s literally too distracting to relax and nod off into a slumber.
For those ultra-sensitive couples, they should try the Face to Face “cuddling” sleeping position, where both partners are sleeping on their sides, face to face, like in the illustration above.
It’s still somewhat intimate as you can see each other, but there is no actual cuddling
The Perfect Cuddling Position
Finding the perfect cuddling position or positions is a very personal thing, dependent on both you and your partner’s own preferences. It’s sort of like finding the perfect sex position…
It depends on a lot of personal factors.
Our advice is to try all the different ways to cuddle that we covered above and keep a running list of what cuddling positions work best for you.
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Wow you know all the cuddling techniches that u just mentioned here are very important,and me n my partner are on the ryt track bcos we tend to do them all. Thank you very much for your information,I have more experience now because of your articles.thanks.
LOVE THIS!! Me and my boyfriend do all of these all the time, we love to cuddle and relax or watch a movie. We even cuddle when we game!
I love cuddling, my favorite sleeping cuddle is back to back, I like to have his rear in the small of my back, and our feet intertwined.
Some guys like my boyfriend respond negatively to supposedly too much cuddling. I like to cuddle and show affection this way. I came from a family where everyone likes to give hugs and be hugged. He tells me I don’t get enough affection and I try to scale back but it doesn’t seem like I’m being true to who I am. Culturally his family is very different and more reserved than mine.
Thanks Sean, so much info out there benefits men and not enough about the woman. A woman will feel super loved and special therefor sexy if she gets enough quality cuddles.
Kathleen.
Hi K,
It’s not needed to say that women feel the same way as men do. I cannot express all the ‘benefits’ a woman gets in each cuddling position. I might need another article for that. For example, what a man feels when a woman is sitting on his lap, should express by his hands and mouth, depends on how sensual the sitting is.
– A guy who loves cuddling –
My girlfriend likes to cuddle but I know its not comfortable on her neck, I want to correct her or show her a more comfortable way to cuddle but I don’t want to sound weird