The Missionary position is one of the most common and enjoyable sex positions as it makes for some intimate, close and satisfying sex with your man. This guide is going to show you how to perform the Missionary position for maximum pleasure (i.e. orgasms) along with teaching you some awesome variations to get the most out of it.
In the illustration above, you can see the basic Missionary position technique. You’re going to be on your back with your legs open while your man is on top with his legs are in between yours. He can steady himself by resting his weight on his elbows which he positions either side of you. He can also rest part of his weight on you, but should be careful to make sure that it’s not uncomfortable for you. Make sure to tell him if it is.
The great thing about missionary position, is that your man will hit your anterior fornix or A Spot [1][2] provided he is sufficiently well endowed (you can see the A Spot below). This is perfect if you enjoy cervical orgasms.
What The Man Does In The Missionary Position
The Missionary position is very straightforward and doesn’t require much agility or flexibility at all, so it’s suitable for practically everyone. Your man will be doing most of the work during Missionary sex, and he simply needs to thrust in and out of your vagina.
While this movement can certainly be pleasurable for you, you will find that it’s even more pleasurable if he grinds on you at the same time. To do this, he needs to move his pelvis up and down along with thrusting so that his pubic bone can apply pressure onto and around your clitoris, which makes it very similar to the Coital Alignment Technique.
What The Girl Does In The Missionary Position
When you are having sex in the Missionary position with your man, you may feel that because he is on top, that he’s the one in control. But you also have a great degree of control over how deep he penetrates you along with how much stimulation your clitoris gets.
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When your man is on top of you, you can wrap your arms around his neck or head. Alternatively, you can ‘hook’ your arms underneath his arms and grab his back so that you can pull yourself down onto his penis for slightly deeper penetration.
To Stimulate Your Clitoris – If you want him to stimulate your clitoris more than he already is, then all you need to do is grind it against his pubic bone on every thrust. It will take a little while to get your rhythm, but once you do, it feels amazing! Of course, you can also do some manual stimulation with your hands using these masturbation techniques.
To Make Him Penetrate You Deeper – To get him to penetrate you deeper when having Missionary sex is easy. All you need to do is lift your legs up. Keeping them raised in the air can get tiring, so your best bet is to wrap them around your partner’s back like you would do in the Drill position.
If you don’t like wrapping your legs around your man, but still long for deeper penetration, then you can put a pillow or cushion under the small of your back/hips area. This will elevate your vagina and allow him to penetrate you more deeply without you having to raise your legs.
How To Enhance The Missionary Position & Get More Pleasure From It
Roleplay & Light BDSM – In this position, your man is very much in the dominant position on top of you. If you like feeling submissive in this position and want to take it a little further, then you can try some role play. One example would be having your man pin your arms down above your head while you try to struggle free.
Another, more intense roleplay idea would be for him to put one or both hands on your neck and to lightly choke you (of course, having a safe word or even something in your hand to drop to notify your man of a problem is a pre-requisite here). You can find more roleplaying ideas here and an introduction to BDSM here.
Dirty Talk – If you like your man talking dirty to you, then Missionary is the perfect position as your man will naturally be right by your ear. You can find 73 great dirty talking phrases to say to your man here.
Talk to Him! – To make the Missionary position more fun for both of you requires you to talk to your man and for you both to give each other feedback on what you like and don’t like so much. This guide on sexual communication will get you started.
Quick Quiz: Do You Give Lousy Blow Jobs?
If you are new here, then you may want to take the quiz below to learn how good you are at giving oral sex and satisfying your man. You may discover you that you suck (pun intended) or that you are already a blow job queen.
Variations Of Missionary Position & Similar Positions
Sticking with regular Missionary is going to inevitably get boring. That’s why you need to try out some of these great variations:
Deckchair
Your man is going to lift your knees upwards in this position. Click here to find out more about the Deckchair position.
Drill
Wrap your legs around him, cross your ankles and pull him into you for deeper penetration. Click here to find out more about the Drill position.
Hang Loose
This is almost identical to regular Missionary except for one distinct difference; you are going to be hanging your head over the edge of the bed. Click here to find out more about the Hang Loose position.
Sandwich
The Sandwich requires a little flexibility and strength but allows for deep penetration. Click here to find out more about it.
Spread Legs
You also need to be pretty flexible to perform the Spread Legs position. Many feel that it has more in common with the Anvil position. Click here to find out more about the Spread Legs position.
Sean’s Thoughts On The Missionary Position
If you haven’t had sex many times before, then you’ll find that the missionary position is very comfortable and hassle free to perform. One of the most underrated aspects of it is that you have a large degree of control as to how deep you take your man. You should also note that during the Missionary position, your man can rest on his elbows instead of his hands. On a very niche, but important side note: Recent research has shown that if you are a woman who has had hip replacement surgery, then the safest position you can have sex in is the Missionary position [3][4]; yet another reason to make Missionary a staple in your sex life.
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Thanks for the tips 🙂 I couldnt get my penis in at first..
Also allows you to suck her toes and kiss her feet.
That’s my favorite thing to do.
lubrication helps alot with getting in. make sure you are foreplaying and get some lube if necessary.
There is so much more to the missionary position, mainly from the woman. To give a good orgasm to the man and to get a better one for herself, she must squeeze and relax her vagina floor muscles while she does the pelvic tilt up and down and in hips rotation. I had a woman (East Indian) who could masturbate my penis with her vigona. I can guarantee you that it took me by surprize and I last only a few seconds (I was 30 yo).
As you describe it, the woman will assume that she can just lay down and enjoy the ride. Unless she has a natural tight vagina, her partner will eventually get bored and may even loose his penis hardness. Be3n dare done dat!
Need Advise: My partner is relatively new to sex and when we do this position his knees tend to always slip when he speeds up in thrusting….. any suggestions on how to help his knees stay in position?
Hmmm…I’ve never heard this, but he could use his toes/feet to stop himself slipping, like using them as brakes. Alternatively, he should rest on his elbows more.