Love is fantastic! But some people take their obsession with love a little further than most. They’re in love with the idea of love, and all they need is a man to plug into their daydreams to make them a reality. Being a hopeless romantic can be a distraction, but it can also force you to wait for the perfect man. Are you a hopeless romantic?
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Here are 16 signs you’re a hopeless romantic:
1. You’re obsessed with romantic movies
Watching rom coms can be fun and entertaining. And if you buy into them, this is a sign you’re a hopeless romantic. Romantic comedies typically are about the woman finally finding “the one,” her one and only true love. This usually happens from some random or chance meeting. There are then some mishaps along the way, but things always work out in the end. This is the stuff of fantasies. Finding “the one” involves more than just happening to be in the right place at the right time and then falling in love. To have a real relationship requires some work.
2. You’re constantly looking for romantic “signs”
A hopeless romantic is always looking for love. And she never knows when she’ll bump into her soul mate. If you’re a hopeless romantic, you might look for signs. For example, maybe your beloved dog just died, and then you meet a random stranger (one you’re attracted to) who is walking the same breed of dog that you used to have. You could take this as a sign that he’s the one. A sign can be anything. But remember that just because you say it’s a sign, and read something into an event, doesn’t necessarily mean that it is.
3. You love symbols of love
Symbols of love let you express your feelings. They help in describing the love emotions you feel, and they let you tap into the energy of love. If you find that you love even the symbols of love, you are probably a hopeless romantic. Some symbols of love that show the signs you’re a hopeless romantic are the following:
- Heart: this most common love symbol is the one people most associate with love. This symbol is thought to strengthen relationships.
- Rose: this flower represents romance and sexuality. The rose was Aphrodite’s (the Greek love goddess) symbol.
- Apple: this fruit represents fertility, abundance, and love. When cut in half, it resembles a vagina.
- Cupid: this symbol represents desire and the union of couples.
- Harp: musicians who are also romantic choose the harp as their love symbol, as it signals devotion and love.
4. You’re obsessive over cute, older couples
If, whenever you notice an older couple, you immediately think of how you want someone to grow old with, this is a sign you’re a hopeless romantic. All you can think about is how devoted this couple must be to each other and how that’s what you want too.
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5. You’re always crushing on someone
If you’re always crushing on someone but then never stick around when things get tough, you are in love with the initial feeling of being in love more than the actual person, which is a sign you’re a hopeless romantic. The first stage of love is addictive, and when that goes away and changes to a lasting and sustainable love, hopeless romantics might become restless and look for that next love fix. That’s not love; it’s limerence. More on that here.
6. You fall in love quickly
If you find that you fall in love easily, again, it’s because you love the idea of being in love more than you actually love the person. As soon as the excitement ends, you will likely be gone, never actually giving the person a chance. If you really want a long-term relationship, take your time, and don’t declare that you’re “in love” too soon.
7. You dislike thinking about practical parts of relationships
Relationships that last take work. They are not all about going on romantic dates and making love all the time. You both need to communicate to find out whether you really are right for each other. You need to be on the same page about children, where you will live, how you feel about money, and whether you share the same religious beliefs. If you find that you never get to those topics, you probably just like the idea of love and don’t really want to do the work involved.
8. You would never settle
Hopeless romantics often have a difficult time settling down with someone because they have a long list of requirements, have high expectations, and they won’t settle for anything less. This stems from romantic movies and books (including Disney princess movies) that reinforce the theme that there is only “the one,” and that one person will possess all the qualities of your fantasies. But remember, this is a fantasy. It’s a good idea to have a list with some must-have qualities on it, but the more items you put on your list, the more difficult it will be for you to find and have a deep, meaningful relationship.
9. Butterflies are more important than security
If you’re a hopeless romantic, you’re probably addicted to falling in love and the heady days that ensue, the days of butterflies in your stomach every time you think of him. You want to feel passion, love, and desire. Being safe and secure are often at odds with those feelings, however, and the hopeless romantic will choose the short-term butterfly feelings over long-term emotional security.
10. You become emotionally invested in fairy tale romances of celebrities
Being over involved in which celebrity is with whom is another sign you’re a hopeless romantic. You worship these people from a fan level, and you might even imagine yourself with your favorite celebrity. This is all part of the fantasy of love and is rarely the real thing.
11. You Facebook stalk crushes
You probably know that it’s weird (and often illegal, depending on the extremes) to actually stalk someone. So stalking on Facebook or other social media might seem okay to a hopeless romantic. If you’re going to stalk someone on Facebook, add him to your friends, at least. It’s normal to go through this past out of curiosity, but if you can’t wait to sign on to Facebook each day to keep constant tabs on him, you’ve gone too far. And it’s never okay to create a fake profile to add your crush. That crosses the line.
Consider talking to your crush, instead.
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12. You daydream about your wedding constantly
There’s nothing wrong with daydreaming about your wedding. But if you get so wrapped up in your daydreams and fantasies, you might be neglecting your real life. Daydreaming sets up a situation that might never be obtainable and is one of the signs you’re a hopeless romantic.
13. Modern dating confuses and frustrates you
One of the biggest signs you’re a hopeless romantic is to prefer old-fashioned dating to modern dating. You long for a man to chase and pursue you. You want the man to be the leader in the game of love and you to be the follower. You want your date to always pay for the first date, not to expect to have sex with you on the first date, and to open doors for you. You also prefer that he call you to talk and not to text all the time.
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14. You become involved in relationships of those around you
Hopeless romantics often insert themselves in their friends’ relationships. They believe they know what’s best in the romance arena and aren’t shy about interfering in other relationships if they think that relationship needs helping. But this is seldom a good idea. You will only be seen as a meddler if you do that, and you really are intruding in a place where you don’t belong. Basically, if no one asked for your advice regarding their relationship, don’t give it. It’s not your job to tell your friends whether they should dump a guy or not.
15. You’re emotionally impacted by love songs
If you’re a hopeless romantic, you will listen to any song about love, whether it’s a happy song or a sad one. Sad love songs are particularly appealing to hopeless romantics because they let people feel sad without actually feeling sadness about their own lives.
16. You have a Valentine’s Day obsession
And if you’re a hopeless romantic, everyone knows what your favorite holiday is!
While some people think being a hopeless romantic is a bad thing, being one can also simply mean that you’re a sensitive person who is looking for the right guy. If you recognize the signs you’re a hopeless romantic, you might want to do more to protect your heart. But being a romantic enables you to experience all the joys of falling in love.
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