Have you ever woken up from a sexy dream and wanted to dive right back in? Perhaps you’re one of the lucky few women who has had orgasms while asleep, or maybe even your man has talked about having incredible wet dreams during his sleep. Wouldn’t it be amazing if you could have sex dreams and, better yet, sex dreams that were under your control? Fortunately, you can.
Why Sex Dreams?
Maybe you have plenty of good sex and solo orgasm time during the day. Perhaps you simply view sleep as a time to relax and recuperate, so you don’t want to try to do anything else other than close you eyes when your head hits the pillow. Perhaps you’ve already fantasized or even written about plenty of steamy scenarios. What’s exactly in it for you?
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For starters, dreaming offers a bit of “reality” that daydreams don’t. Dreams often feel real, providing you with the same high and even physical response that can happen from real sex. But you can experience sex with people or in situations that you can’t access in the waking world. And if you’re worried about trying something new, like BDSM, you can try it out in dreams!
Plus, you can do things in dreams such as fly or swim deep in the ocean, which adds another element of excitement!
Sex dreams might also lead you to some extra orgasms, which are good for you in all sorts of ways. And you can learn how to have sex dreams for no other reason than it allows you to experience your sexuality in new ways and have lots of fun.
Learn How to Have Sex Dreams
It’s much easier to have sex dreams if your mind is already on sex before you head to bed. There are plenty of ways to accomplish this.
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Masturbate Before Bed — The key here is to stop before you’re going to orgasm. Get your body ready to cum, but ease off and let yourself go to sleep. If you’re usually the type to focus on the goal, take your time and focus on what feels good. Pay close attention to your body. Starting with some massage oils, scented candles or sensual music might help inspire your mind to provide you with sex dreams as you slumber.
If you normally experience clitoral orgasms, you might want to focus on G-spot stimulation or vice versa. Check out our guide for G-spot stimulation here. We’re also got great tips for clitoral masturbation.
Hold Off On Sexual Activity — Part of the reason wet dreams are so intense for guys is because their bodies are responding to sexual tension that hasn’t been expressed. Men and women alike can take more control to leverage that tension by holding off on sex and masturbation. It might be difficult, but it might also be tons of fun to push your body to its limit in pursuit of a sex dream.
You might even find that you have sex dreams or even accidental orgasms after a long dry spell.
Read Erotica — This goes hand in hand with masturbating. After all, a steamy story or scene is the perfect complement to masturbation. Of course, you might not trust yourself not to orgasm, so you can stick to reading by itself.
If you’re new to erotica, there are plenty of options available to you. From full-length novels to short stories to fan fiction and everything in between, there’s no shortage of sexy reading material to sate your appetite. And there’s nothing stopping you from writing your own. Test your skills as an author and get in a sexy mood before you slide between the sheets.
Sultry reading doesn’t necessarily have to be explicit, either. You might have a favorite romance novel where there’s an implied sex scene that does it for you. Why not break open the book and give it another go ’round?
Watch Porn — What’s sexier than watching Sasha Grey or James Deen on screen? Perhaps you’re a bigger fan of Jenna Jameson or there’s an up-and-coming porn starlet who grabs your eye!
The great thing about porn is that there’s truly something for everyone, so even if you don’t like what you see of mainstream porn, you can dig a little deeper to find flicks featuring real couples, sensual scenes or even bondage sessions that will get your heart pumping and prepare your mind for sexy dreams. In a pinch, you can even hit up Tumblr to enjoy sexy photos, videos and animations.
Not everyone likes full-on pornography, though. It’s okay if you don’t. You might prefer something more sensual like a scene from a movie or TV show. Remember those scenes in “Ghost,” “The Notebook” and “Titanic”? Who can forget them! Fast forward through the rest of the movie — or watch it, if you prefer — and feast your eyes on attractive actors making sex look like the best thing ever. Okay, maybe it is!
Of course, there are other things you can do to get your body and mind ready for sex dreams. Consider listening to sensual music, trading sexy pictures or videos with someone hot or simply a little sexting. Check out our guide for sending flirty texts to get some inspiration.
What If You Don’t Know How to Have a Sex Dream?
Just because you follow all our advice doesn’t mean you’ll have steamy sex dreams. You might be too exhausted or stressed or distracted for it to work out. And trying to control your dreams is a battle against your subconscious. However, this doesn’t make it impossible. Just consider lucid dreaming.
Lucid dreaming is a state of dreaming where you’re aware that you’re dreaming, and you become able to control elements of your dreams. Lucid dreaming if often practiced by the same people who practice meditation, and it can be used simply to turn a bad dream into a good one. However, you won’t be alone if you want to know how to have sex dreams via lucid dreaming. One source states that this is the number one reason people turn to lucid dreaming.
As soon as you realize you’re dreaming, you can tell yourself that you’re dreaming. Saying things “to” your dream can help them happen. For example, try ‘I’m flying,” and you’ll start flying. It may take some time to get accustomed to, but you can hone your lucid dreaming skills over time and use them to have sexy dreams!
And don’t forget about bringing a certain sexy someone into your dreams. It’s recommended that you imagine them out of your field of vision. You’ll be aware that Brad Pitt, Adam Levine or Zac Efron — or all three! — is near, and you can summon them closer for a hands-on experience.
What if you don’t know who you want to have sex with? If you practice lucid dreaming, you might even be able to encourage your subconscious to show you your true love or the best sex partner you’ll ever have.
To change the scene, look for a door, archway or similar passageway. Move through the door into a room or setting that’s more sexy. You can do the same with a mirror, by turning the TV station or even spinning around to a new scene.
Because it’s so easy to slip out of a lucid dream, you’ll want to remind yourself often that you’re dreaming. Dream-you can pair this with an action, such as rubbing your hands or blinking, to stay grounded and calm while in the dream state. If you become too excited, you might wake up or lose the lucid state of dreaming. However, you can always try again next time.
Although it’s possible that every person can lucid dream, not everyone realizes this reality.
Even if you’re unable to lucid dream, you may still retain enough control over your dreams and use the steps suggested above to get your body and mind into the right state to have a steamy sex dream. You may find yourself waking from sex dreams in a heightened state of arousal, and then you can take the opportunity to masturbate. Who knows, you might even be able to return to sleep and continue your sexy dream!
If you’re like some people, you might not remember the sex dreams you have once you wake. You’ll know best whether you’re the type to remember your dreams. However, even taking steps before bed to try to get your brain into the sexy zone can make for a comfortable night’s sleep. And if you’re able to learn how to have sex dreams? Your nighttime repertoire just became much more fun!