206 Deep, Revealing & Fun Questions To Ask Your Partner

This list of 206 fun, yet deeply intimate questions to ask your partner will help you quickly get to know each other like no other relationship you’ve ever been in.

You can skip straight to the list of questions to ask, but I would advise you first to read and heed my advice before you proceed to the full list of questions to ask your partner…

Some Words Of Advice & Caution

1. Don’t surprise your partner with these questions – You may be excited to start asking your significant other these 206 questions.

That’s great!

However…

The questions below can be very deep. The person answering them will reveal intimate, closely held secrets about themselves that may feel very intense for them.

So…

If you catch your partner off guard and surprise them with these questions, they may feel like you are interrogating them or you are acting a bit weird.

On the other hand…

If you mention that a friend recommended a list of interesting questions that will help you get to know each other in a fun but sometimes intense way…

It’s going to go a lot smoother. You can even give them options between the more mundane and juicy questions.

Of course, you (hopefully) know your partner best. They may love answering seemingly random questions, just keep their personality in mind when picking which questions to ask them.

Long story short:

These questions work best when your partner is excited to start answering them, meaning it might be best to start with more general questions before working your way toward the intensely personal ones.

Speaking of excitement…

2. The purpose of these questions is to have fun – If you ask these questions because…

• You hope to trick them.
• You hope to catch them out.
• You want to learn something personal about them they don’t want to share, then…

You will both have a bad time.

These questions to ask your boyfriend are designed so that you have a fun time together, share some laughs, and truly get to know each other on a deep, intimate level.

Having any other agenda will backfire.

3. Use these questions to start a conversation – Don’t use these questions to interrogate your partner, and…

Don’t pummel your husband or wife with questions.

The purpose of each question is to start a conversation and give you things to talk about, not to pry information from your partner…

Yeah, yeah, yeah…

I’ve already talked about how the 206 questions below shouldn’t feel like an interrogation, but I need to mention it again,

Because…

These questions are actually just a springboard to a conversation, where you BOTH answer each question.

That’s right.

First, ask your partner the question. After they’ve answered, you can also answer it and share your own experience.

So…

Don’t ask any spicy questions that you would not answer yourself.

4. Follow up with “Why?” – When you or your partner are done answering a question to get to know someone romantically, the person asking the question should consider asking “Why?” as a follow-up instead of jumping into their own answer or the next question.

Asking “Why?” is insanely simple and can help get the conversation flowing.

Additionally, it encourages you to open up and share the motivations behind your answers–perfect for truly getting to know someone.

If you find that “Why?” doesn’t encourage your partner to say more, think about other clarifying questions you could ask, from comparisons to metaphors, to encourage them to open up and elaborate. Sometimes, you might need to ask your fiance more open-ended questions if you don’t find them receptive to Yes/No questions.

It’s okay if you’re not enthralled by some of these interesting questions, too. They’re just here to give you things to talk about if you want something new.

5. Some of these questions could uncover negative aspects of your partner’s personality – Most of these questions to get to know your partner below will uncover incredibly positive and fun aspects of their personality (and yours, too).

However…

Some questions are quite serious and can even uncover negative aspects of your partner’s personality that you may not like to hear.

Asking too many of these questions in a row will most likely lead to an outcome that’s…

Awkward, uncomfortable, and somewhat negative.

I have marked these questions that can lead your partner to share negative aspects of their personality with an asterisk (*).

My advice is to avoid asking too many of these questions that have an asterisk beside them

Let’s get to the questions!

34 Sex & Intimacy Questions To Truly Get To Know Your Partner

These intimacy and sex questions will help you both learn how to turn your lover on and give them deep sexual satisfaction…And have a few giggles, too!

1. If you could only choose between these two options for the rest of your life from your partner, what would you choose: 1) Warm physical affection and close intimacy, but no sex. 2) Intense wild sex, but no physical affection or intimacy.
2. Would you prefer me to have a sex drive higher than yours or lower? It can’t be the same. Side note: learn how to increase your libido.
3. Tell me the story of the build-up to the best sex you’ve ever had.
4. Did you ever explore a kink, fantasy, or sex act that you thought you would enjoy but didn’t?
5. Does the idea of a possessive partner turn you on?* In a fantasy or reality?
6. If you could only be submissive in the bedroom or dominant in the bedroom for the rest of your life, what would you choose?
7. Do you feel like you have better sex as you’ve matured?
8. Do you have any fantasies or kinks that you’ll never share with anyone?
9. Do you have any fantasies or kinks that you don’t want to explore in real life?
10. Is there any type of person you are deeply sexually attracted to but don’t want to date?
11. Do you find it arousing to give oral sex to your partner? Side note: learn how to eat pussy and how to give a good blow job.
12. What was your first time having sex like?
13. What was your best anal experience? Side note: learn how to have pain-free anal sex.
14. Is there a specific type of person you are attracted to?
15. Do you know anyone with an unhealthy attitude towards sex?*
16. Can you be turned on by someone’s intelligence (social/intellectual)?
17. Have you ever been attracted to an arrogant person?
18. What could a physically attractive person do that would turn you off instantly?
19. Did you ever want to be intimate with one of your partner’s friends?
20. Can you be attracted to someone solely by their career choice?
21. Is there anyone you would like to sleep with, even though it could cause serious repercussions in your life?
22. For straight people: If you had an intimate relationship with a person of the same sex as you, what physical and non-physical traits would you look for in your new partner? For non-straight people: If you had an intimate relationship with a person of the opposite sex, what physical and non-physical traits would you look for in your new partner?
23. Did you ever regret having sex too soon with someone?
24. Did you ever regret having sex with someone?
25. When it comes to toys or penises, how big is too big, and how small is too small?
26. Do you ever get aroused by non-sexual things?
27. Do you ever feel that you should masturbate less? Side note: 14 powerful masturbation techniques for women
28. Do you find it hard to communicate your deepest sexual desires?
29. Do you think there is anything wrong with faking orgasms?
30. Who is the last celebrity you’ve masturbated to?
31. Are you more comfortable leading during sex or being led?
32. When is sex on a first date a good idea?
33. Have you ever slut-shamed someone or been slut-shamed by someone?*
34. Do you think people should be more or less open minded about sex?*

34 Relationship Questions To Ask Your Partner To Understand Their Attitudes About Dating

Ask your partner these 34 relationship questions to learn how many goals you share. You’ll quickly learn if you share the same hopes, attitudes, wants, and desires to discover if this woman or man could be the one. You might learn something surprising about your spouse’s love languages when you ask these romantic questions, too!

1. Have you ever wanted to put a love lock on a bridge and throw away the key?
2. What’s worse: physical cheating with no emotional cheating or emotional cheating with no physical cheating?
3. Have you ever checked someone’s phone/messages/computer without their permission?*
4. Have you ever broken up with someone?
5. Did you ever have a great connection with the parents of someone you were in a relationship with?
6. Has someone ever broken up with you?
7. How important is receiving gifts for you?
8. Have you ever felt like you lost your identity in a relationship?
9. What do you think is one major problem with marriage and one major benefit?
10. What do you value most in a friendship?
11. When is cheating on your partner justified?
12. What do you define as cheating?
13. Is there anyone who may think they are in a relationship with you?
14. Have you ever been in a relationship with a needy person?
15. Does the financial status of your partner matter in any way in a relationship?*
16. Looking back, have you ever stayed in a relationship for longer than you should have?
17. Have you ever been on a weird or awkward date? Side note: 30 great date ideas.
18. Would you move to the other side of the world to be with someone?
19. Have you ever found it hard to move on after a relationship ended?
20. Do you ever feel that the love you experienced for someone is different from what you thought it would be?
21. What do we kick ass at as a couple?
22. Is there anything you’d like to try together?
23. When did you know you wanted to be in a relationship with me?
24. Would you prefer to be in a relationship of convenience (someone to share the bills with and introduce to friends as your partner) or be alone?
25. Would you be willing to overlook the negative aspects of a person if they were incredibly wealthy?
26. How have your relationship goals changed over the last ten years?
27. Do you think soulmates exist?
28. Have you ever felt embarrassed at how far you went to impress someone?
29. Did you make any mistakes in past relationships that you want to avoid in future relationships?
30. What is the right level of drama in a relationship?
31. Do you ever think you may be difficult to live with?
32. What would you prefer in a partner: either an intense, type-A overachiever or a chill, laid-back partner with very low ambition?
33. Did you ever wish a relationship lasted longer?
34. Do you have a type?

28 Questions To Get to Know Your Partner’s Hopes, Goals & Expectations For Life

You will discover your partner’s hopes, goals, and ambitions for their own life by asking them these deep questions. Consider building up to these intimate questions or alternating between a serious question and a lighter one to avoid creating too tense of a mood.

1. What’s the most important purchase you’ve ever made?
2. Did you ever want to be famous? What for?
3. What are you most proud of in your life?
4. Is there any skill you would love to have but don’t want to practice and earn it?
5. Which of your dreams have you decided not to pursue?
6. Did you ever have an opportunity presented to you that you regret not taking?
7. Do you have any major regrets in the last year?
8. Is there something you really want to do but still haven’t made concrete plans for?
9. If you only had six perfectly healthy months left to live, what would you do?
10. Is there a topic or subject you wished you knew more about?
11. Would you change anything about your life?
12. If you could start over, would you choose the same educational or career path?
13. Would you prefer your social life to be more hectic or less hectic?
14. What is a work/job goal you would like to achieve before you retire?
15. Did you ever experience a major life (or work) setback?
16. In what circumstances would you be willing to be in a relationship where only one partner works?
17. Did you ever want to improve some aspect of your life?
18. Who were your role models growing up?
19. If you went back to when you were 12 and could see the life you have today, what would your 12-year-old self say?
20. What is the last major change you’ve consciously made in your life?
21. Do you ever find yourself looking back on what could have been?
22. Would you prefer to be wealthy and unknown or poor but well-known?
23. Do you ever feel like you’ve handicapped yourself in life in a way that prevented you from achieving certain goals?
24. What were your job aspirations at ten years old?
25. Do you ever feel that you are wasting some aspect of your life?
26. Did you make your university/job choice out of fear or passion?
27. If you were forced into creating a non-profit, what would it do?
28. What is your biggest worry about these three things: 1) Money 2) Health 3) Relationships with others

35 Questions To Ask Your Partner About Their Family & Friends

Learning about someone’s view of others tells you much about that person. That’s why you should ask your partner the following deep questions to learn their views. They’re also great if you’re struggling to figure out things to talk about.

1. Was there ever a time that you’ve been incredibly mean or even just slightly mean to someone? Did they deserve it? Do you regret it?
2. When was the last time a friend or family member’s opinion changed your mind?
3. Do you ever worry that you don’t listen to the advice of people you trust?
4. Do you ever worry that other people’s advice has too much influence on you?
5. What makes you more anxious: small talk or deep conversation with a stranger?
6. Who are the three people you spend most of your time with?
7. Who is the most important person in your family?
8. Do you think that how you were raised helps you in your life?
9. When was the last time you made someone angry?*
10. Can you remember a moment when your parents felt particularly proud of you?
11. Did you ever feel that you disappointed your parents?
12. Did you ever wish you were kinder to someone?
13. Is there anything you would like to change about your friends?
14. Have you ever had a horrible boss or co-worker?
15. Is there anyone you’d like to apologize to but haven’t yet?
16. Have you ever bullied someone?*
17. Have you ever felt bullied by someone?
18. When is the last time you’ve been angry?
19. Do you think you’re similar to your parents?
20. How strict would you be as a parent on a scale of 1-10? 10 being the strictest and 1 being the most lenient?
21. What do you believe is the most important part of a family?
22. How did you feel after meeting my parents for the first time?
23. Did you ever experience work drama?
24. Is there any aspect about your parents that you wish they would work on or improve?*
25. Do you have any friends that you consider to be anal about certain things (cleanliness, dietary habits, etc)?
26. What is the nicest thing someone has ever done for you?
27. What is the kindest thing someone has done for you when you were sad?
28. If your friend came to you and told you that their partner was having an affair, what would you say to them?
29. Are you ever selfish in a way that you later regret?
30. Are you ever selfish in a way that is totally justified?
31. Have you ever felt jealous or envious of a close friend?
32. What positive traits have you developed due to your family and upbringing?
33. Did you want more or less siblings when you were a kid?
34. Did your parents do a good job?
35. Do you know anyone who doesn’t deserve the success they have?*

19 Questions To Ask Your Partner To Learn About Their Deepest Personal Beliefs

Learning about a partner’s deepest beliefs can be tough, especially since most people don’t just randomly share these things. Ask your partner these 19 questions to get to know them and learn about their deepest beliefs. These questions to ask when dating can be helpful when determining if you should take the next step with a potential partner or should stay in the realm of one-night stands.

1. When was the last time your star sign affected your life?
2. How significant is religion in your life?
3. Would you stop dating someone because of their political beliefs?*
4. Do you prefer to arrive at the airport with lots of time to spare or to arrive just in time before the plane leaves?
5. Do you believe you received any privileges/advantages in life that you had no control over? Even a small privilege?
6. Is there anything in your life when you were younger that seemed ‘normal,’ but now you think it is weird?
7. Would you vaccinate your kids?*
8. Are all abortions okay?*
9. Do you ever feel that some of your beliefs would horrify other people?
10. Do you believe people with mental health issues get enough support in society today?
11. Do you have any supernatural beliefs or those that you can’t fully back up with facts or evidence? E.g., believing in ghosts.
12. Do you think you’re an intuitive person?
13. In what circumstances would you stay friendly with a racist person?
14. What do job titles mean to you?
15. Do you believe you’re a lucky person?
16. Do you believe you are a mostly tolerant person? What are you intolerant of?
17. If you didn’t have to worry about money, what job or chore would you be excited to do for free?
18. If you didn’t have to worry about money, would you prefer to have no kids, one kid or ten kids?
19. How much money is enough money for you?

44 Questions To Ask Your Partner To Learn About Their Personal Interests and Self-Perception

When getting to know someone, learning about their personal interests is obviously important. Additionally, learning about how they perceive themselves can help you understand them better. These questions will help greatly with that…

1. What videos are recommended to you on the YouTube homepage? (These videos are usually tailored heavily to their personal interests.)
2. What advertisements do you see in your Facebook/Instagram/TikTok feed? (Similarly, these advertisements are often incredibly precise and focused on their true interests.)
3. Would you ever consider plastic surgery and why?*
4. Are you stubborn about anything?
5. What makes you more anxious: small talk or deep conversation with a stranger?
6. What do you think is the craziest part of your personality?
7. Have you ever wanted someone to feel jealous of you?
8. Would you say that your personality is more emotional or logical?
9. Do you prefer to work in a group of people or alone?
10. What’s the angriest/most frustrated you’ve been in the last week?
11. Do you ever feel misunderstood?
12. Do you follow any self-imposed rules? E.g., No caffeine after noon, no alcohol before weekdays, or no sex before marriage.
13. Did you have a game or toy you adored as a kid?
14. If all drugs were legal, would you try any?
15. If you could go back ten years and tell your younger self something, what would it be?
16. Is there any small thing, issue, or concern that stresses you out, even though it shouldn’t?
17. Do you feel that you are smarter or dumber than the average person your age?
18. Were you ever happy to see someone fail?*
19. What do you think people say about you behind your back?
20. Do you consider yourself a sporty person?
21. Are you ever embarrassed about how you acted as a teenager?
22. How would your parents describe you?
23. What’s your favorite part of your body?
24. Do you have a slightly or very addictive relationship with anything?*
25. Do you have any habits that you wish you could change?
26. Do you get a lot of your self-worth from your job?
27. Does being the oldest, youngest, or middle child affect someone’s personality?
28. Have you changed much over the last year?
29. Have I helped you to improve anything about yourself?
30. What’s the best gift you ever received?
31. Are you comfortable kissing a partner in front of your parents and friends?
32. Looking back, what would make you happy as a kid?
33. What’s the last good book you’ve read?
34. When is the last time you cried?
35. Do you judge people based on the food they eat?
36. Have you ever been nervous before going on a trip/vacation?
37. Do you think more or less people should go to therapy?
38. Do you ever feel that you may be crazy in some way?
39. How do you deal with frustration?
40. Which of the following two states do you find yourself in more often: stressed or anxious? What causes you to be stressed? What causes you to be anxious?
41. What did you hate most about being a kid?*
42. Do you ever feel like you need to hide certain aspects of yourself from people?
43. Are you better at recognizing your own flaws or the flaws in others?
44. Before making a telephone call, do you ever rehearse what you are going to say?

12 Fun Questions To Ask Your Partner

A lot of the previous relationship questions were incredibly serious and earnest, which makes them great for getting to know your partner on a deeper level. But, sometimes, the resulting conversations end up being quite intense. The following questions to get to know a person are lighter fare and may even have you laughing your asses off together.

Don’t worry; even seemingly trivial questions can build a connection, especially when paired with eye contact.

1. When eating breakfast, what goes into your bowl first, cereal or milk?
2. What’s the last song you’ve listened to on repeat?
3. When was the last time you were very embarrassed?
4. What is the last rule you broke?
5. What is the last law you broke?
6. If you were organizing a dinner party, who are three people you would like to invite (anyone in the world, alive or dead)?
7. Do you have any type of bucket list?
8. Do you have any recurring dreams?
9. Can you describe yourself in 3-5 words?
10. Can you describe me in 3-5 words?
11. What do you think is the most attractive part of you?
12. What’s the dumbest thing you’ve ever purchased?*

That’s all the 206 questions to ask your boyfriend or girlfriend to get to know them in a deeper, more intimate way. If you have any of your own questions to get to know someone that you think should be included, please share them in the comments section.