5 Explosive Techniques: How To Finger Yourself To Orgasm

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In this guide, I’m going to show you some really powerful techniques you can use to learn how to finger yourself and have incredible orgasms. (Guys will also learn a ton from this article too on how to please women…so if you’re a guy reading…pay attention!)

g-spot-cross-section

I’ve structured the article very carefully so that you get maximum benefit from it. First I’m going to show you how to get yourself aroused and turned on…this is super important if you want to get the most out of these fingering techniques. Then I’m going to show you the techniques themselves. By the way, these are just a few of the fingering techniques I teach. You can learn even more in the article on squirtingthis one on masturbation and this other one too.

Quick Note: If you want to learn my most powerful dirty talking phrases, tips & techniques, then you will learn a lot from this dirty talking tutorial video. Enjoy!

Ok, let’s jump in…

Getting Aroused, Turned On & In The Mood

I want to cut to the chase and give you the most important things you can do to ‘get in the mood’. Please don’t skip this part. Without getting properly aroused and turned on first, your orgasms will likely not be as intense….and I’m guessing you want some intense orgasms, right?

Relaxed & Stress Free - Getting relaxed and being as stress free as possible is vital. Have you ever noticed that when you’re stressed out and fatigued, it can be hard to get aroused and feel sexy? Scientific research even backs this up.

Privacy - Having some place quiet that you can go to and not be disturbed is key. For most people this will be your bedroom. But if you share your room with someone else, then you may have to use the bathroom or shower as your private place to try these fingering techniques.

Atmosphere - Getting aroused has both a psychological and a physical component. I know that sounded a little ‘scientific’ and not so fun, but it’s true. You need to get your brain turned on as well as your body. To get yourself physically aroused (your body), you’re going to need to touch and caress yourself, specifically your erogenous zones. Even using a vibrator can help.

To get psychologically turned on (your brain), there are a lot of potential things you can do:

  • Burn incense
  • Light candles
  • Watch some porn
  • Listen to music
  • Read some romance/erotica

Your Heroin - The last and most important thing to consider to getting yourself aroused is what I like to call ‘your heroin’. I’m not talking about the hard drug here, lol! I’m referring to the one thing that always works for you to get yourself worked up. It could be reading a certain piece of erotica. It could be thinking of a certain guy or fantasizing about a certain situation that really gets you going or it could be something else entirely.

The important thing is discovering it and then using it to help get yourself aroused.

1. How To Finger Yourself – Basic Technique

Quick Note: Make sure to trim and file your fingernails beforehand to prevent any accidents.

Once you are set up and in the mood, it’s time to start fingering yourself. Start by lowering your hand from your breasts, down to over your stomach until you can feel your clitoris which is located outside your vagina and just above it as you can see in the diagram below.

how-to-finger-yourself-vagina-diagram

Below your clit, using just one finger, you will be able to feel fleshy folds of skin on either side of your vagina. These are your labia.

To be scientific about it, the outer fold on each side is called the labia majora which is much bigger, while the inner fold of skin is called the labia minora and is much thinner and ‘loose’. Start by lightly trailing a finger or 2 over your labia. Most women will find that as they rub their labia, they naturally start to get wet, if they are already turned on. This wetness will act as a lubricant on your finger.

As your finger gets covered in this natural lubricant, start to slowly press the tip of it in and out of your vagina to check how it feels. As you push your finger in and out, it will get covered in more and more of this lubrication, allowing you to easily slide your finger deeper and deeper into your vagina. Slowly run the tip of your finger along the walls of your vagina paying attention to what feels most pleasurable.

There’s no one ‘right way’ when figuring out how to finger yourself. What you find most pleasurable will be different to what other people enjoy. So focus on the movements that you find most satisfying and don’t worry too much about being ‘right’.

Additionally, it’s not a case of going as deep as possible. Fingering yourself should be about getting as much pleasure as possible. But if you have never fingered yourself before, then it’s a good idea to experiment with how deep you like it.

Now lets learn some more really fun fingering techniques

Quick Note: If you find that you don’t naturally produce much lubrication, then make sure to use a good lubricant like coconut oil.

2. Fingering Your G-Spot

As you push your finger in and out or your vagina, you’ll notice that pressing up against certain parts of your vagina feels really good. If you have slid your hand down your stomach and then started to finger yourself, try curling your finger(s) backwards so that you are pressing against the upper wall of your vagina just like in the diagram below. This is where your G-Spot is located.

You’ll know it when you press and rub it because it feels like the back of your palate in your mouth. Some even describe it as feeling like a wet raspberry. In other words, it feels soft with tiny ridges. Try concentrating on the G-Spot for some really intense orgasms.

G spot cross section masturating

There are a number of different G Spot massage techniques to use to make yourself squirt that I cover in the squirting article here. Before continuing on to the more advanced techniques, there are just 2 quick, but important points I need to cover:

1. The G Spot will be impossible to find if you are not turned on. If you’re having trouble finding your G Spot, then check out this article where I explain exactly how to find it.

2. You can see from the diagram how the G-Spot is right beside the bladder. A problem this often causes is the feeling that you need to pee when you stimulate it. So if you feel the need to pee every time you finger yourself and stimulate your G-Spot, then don’t worry, it’s perfectly normal. A great tip that will minimize this ‘needing to pee’ feeling is peeing right before you masturbate. Simple :)

Now that we’ve covered the basics, here are 4 specific fingering techniques that you can use to make yourself cum and have a lot of fun.

3. Pressure Pressing Technique

The pressure pressing fingering technique works especially well if you find it difficult to have vaginal & G Spot orgasms. The problem many women face is that they just can’t put enough pressure on their G Spot during sex or when they’re fingering themselves. The solution is simple…you just need to squeeze your G Spot from the other side.

how-to-finger-yourself-g-spot

In the illustration above, you can clearly see that it’s a man’s penis inside the vagina instead of your hand. I have done this as it’s a technique you can also use during sex if you have trouble reaching orgasm.

So just finger your G Spot as you normally would and then place your other hand at the lowest part of your stomach, just above your pubic bone, as in the illustration above. Then softly push down so that you can feel your G Spot protruding more than normal. You’ll notice that this makes it easier to provide yourself with more G Spot stimulation than normal.

4. Fingering From Behind

Another way to finger yourself is from behind. Put your hand down your lower back, over your anus and then into your vagina. Once you enter your vagina, if you curl your finger backwards, this time you will be stimulating the opposite side of your vagina to your G Spot. While a few people have reported enjoying this and even preferring it, most find that it’s nowhere near as satisfying as having your G Spot and A Spot stimulated.

5. Double Your Fun

This last fingering technique is the best if you are someone who normally struggles to reach orgasm when masturbating. It requires the use of both hands.

g-spot-clitoris-masturbation-cross-section

Your first hand will be fingering your G Spot in the same way as I described earlier while your other hand will be rubbing, massaging & caressing your clit. It’s super simple and makes reaching orgasm inevitable. You can find even more clitoral stimulation techniques here.

Final Thoughts On Fingering Yourself

As you can see from the article, fingering yourself is pretty easy and straightforward. While I have gotten great feedback from those who have tried my 4 techniques above, I strongly encourage you to explore and try to find your own favorite techniques for pleasuring yourself with your fingers. After all, everyone is built slightly differently and responds differently. So have fun and enjoy your orgasms!

If you enjoyed my tips in this article but want a true sex masterclass, then you may be interested in watching this blow job tutorial video where you'll learn my most powerful techniques & tips for giving your man incredible oral sex. Enjoy!

 
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79 Comments

Leave a comment
  1. Brittany October 23, 2012 at 2:43 am #

    Thank you so! This helped me a lot!!:)

    • Sean October 31, 2012 at 10:43 am #

      Glad I could be of help!

      • Alexiaaaaa July 5, 2014 at 5:05 pm #

        I reached a double orgasm and I squirted everywhere.
        Great instructions helped me reach my goal ;)

        -Lexi<3

  2. abbie December 17, 2012 at 11:10 am #

    ThankyouThankyouThankyou!! This helped so much! I tried these out on my friend (we’re both girls, not lesbians just curious and horny at the time) and it was FANTASTIC. It made us both so wet and horny, she even asked me to do it again sometime! THANKS!! Very satisfied customers. ;)

  3. Lozy December 22, 2012 at 3:04 pm #

    thnx it felt really nice ahha i want to do it with someone now

    :’(

  4. Alina January 21, 2013 at 5:01 am #

    Pls help ive been fingering myself in the shower but i can seem 2 squrit!

    • Sean January 24, 2013 at 11:31 am #

      Hi Alina,

      The truth is that some people find it easier than others to squirt. The key is not to be focused on squirting. Instead you should just focus on enjoying yourself and doing what feels best for you. This will help to take pressure off.

      Sean

  5. Kathy January 25, 2013 at 8:28 am #

    Wov, Thank you. It makes me wet and horny. It was really fantastic.

  6. Melinda January 28, 2013 at 5:11 am #

    I finally was able to get my hand inside. It took approx 2 hours of kegals and pushing technique but was well worth the work. Tonight i am going to try a 1 liter plastic bottle with the same method. Tnx.

  7. Ally January 28, 2013 at 10:17 pm #

    OH MY GOD!!!!!!!:) I WISH MY BF WOULD FINGER ME…..THAT FELT AMAZING!!!!!! I WAS LIKE….AHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!

  8. Emily February 11, 2013 at 9:24 pm #

    oh god… I CUMMED =O Yaaaaay!! imma try this again! cya good person that helped me cum =D

  9. Servelan February 17, 2013 at 6:11 am #

    It would be nice to have a graphic of a woman’s hand doing this instead of a man’s hand; it’s obvious that a woman couldn’t have her hand in that position and do that.

    • Sean Jameson February 19, 2013 at 12:40 pm #

      You’re right! If I can find a graphic with a woman’s hand instead of a man’s, I will update it. Thanks,
      Sean

  10. Ashlee March 11, 2013 at 10:33 pm #

    Sean,
    It’s seems like you know all the tricks. You must be quite the ladies man.
    What should I do if I’ve never had an orgasm? I’ve been with my fiancé for 3 years now and still nothing.

    • Sean Jameson March 26, 2013 at 9:28 am #

      Hi Ashlee,
      It’s much easier to first have an orgasm by yourself, while exploring your own body and what turns you on without the pressure of your man being there. Then when you can comfortably and easily give yourself an orgasm without much effort, then it’s time to start trying to have one with your man or by his hand.

      The key is enjoying the process, not focusing on orgasming.

      Sean

    • Carrie May 24, 2013 at 8:06 pm #

      Girlfriend….get a vibrator pronto!

  11. KY March 29, 2013 at 1:37 am #

    hi Sean,

    These tips are really amazing!!! Just from reading and imagining the sensation made me wet wet wet :) thank you soo much! (im going to give it a go and feel in real the experience fom your advise)
    i was wondering, its a little stupid though.. Whats the difference between feeling wet, cum and orgasm??
    You’re like the sex master, so i hope i, the dummy have asked the right person c:

    • Sean Jameson April 9, 2013 at 11:53 am #

      Hi KY,
      Thanks for your praise & question!
      Becoming wet is the self-lubrication process that occurs when many women become aroused.
      Cumming doesn’t always accompany orgasm (but often it does), when you rapidly self-lubricate a lot and can even ejaculate (from your Skene’s gland).
      Orgasm is a peak moment of pleasure that occurs during sex, foreplay or other stimulation. You don’t necessarily have to cum when you orgasm or even be that wet.
      Sean

      • KY April 19, 2013 at 7:25 pm #

        ohh thank you sean,
        I finally understand the difference ^^
        I hope you dont mind me asking another question.. But is it normal to be wet for no reason, like after a long day out.. You come home and somehow find yourself wet? I mean i am not in an ‘aroused mood when this happens.’
        Well thank you again for the clear explanation

        • Sean Jameson April 22, 2013 at 9:29 am #

          Hi KY,

          Yes it’s perfectly normal and nothing to be worried about.

          Sean

  12. Jasmine March 31, 2013 at 2:11 am #

    I tried it but, i don’t seem to be cumming. Any Tips??

    • Sean Jameson April 9, 2013 at 11:44 am #

      Hi Jasmine,
      The key is not to ‘force it’. In other words, don’t put pressure on yourself to have an orgasm and cum. Instead, just focus on enjoying the process and discovering what sorts of things you enjoy.

      Sean

  13. Frida April 16, 2013 at 3:29 pm #

    Hii, I was fingering the clit and I got reallt wet and such, but I came to a point where I couldn’t keep on rubbing the clit because it was to sensitiv… Hard to explain, it felt like I came, but it happened to fast… I am confused

    • Sean Jameson April 19, 2013 at 8:42 am #

      Hi Frida,
      This is completely normal. After you orgasm, your clit can become very sensitive, usually too sensitive to keep on rubbing. All you need to do is just wait until this super-sensitivity subsides and then you can go back to rubbing it again.

      Sean

  14. ka3L9T15R9S April 24, 2013 at 4:43 pm #

    Thanx, i really appreciate the help/advice

  15. Paige April 26, 2013 at 11:33 pm #

    Hello,
    I’m very new at this and I don’t know what it feels like to achieve a orgasm so I don’t know if I’m doing it right. I rubbed my clitoris until it became so sensitive I couldn’t take it anymore. As for the G-Spot I can’t seem to find it, any tips?

    • Sean Jameson April 29, 2013 at 9:56 am #

      Hi Paige,

      There is no right way or wrong way to rub your clitoris as different people enjoy different things. The important thing is to keep experimenting to see what is the most enjoyable thing for you. So experiment with all different kinds of touch, from feather light to soft to quite hard touching.

      Your G-Spot is much easier to find when you are very aroused, so my advice would be to only try to find it when you are super aroused.

      Sean

      • Katie March 19, 2014 at 10:13 pm #

        Hi ummm I had a good feeling and it was unbelievable I was wet wet and even more wet than I can imagine after I cum I used a viberator I squirted so much I screamed. But I fuck with most of the things in my house I fuck with everything I have I did it with my phone once.

  16. steff May 2, 2013 at 2:54 pm #

    I can’t seem τ☺ come or get an Orgasm °̩ just get τ☺ Ɨнє edge where I squirt βut nothing happens °̩ don’t ƒєєℓ ª nice explosion

  17. Sierra May 23, 2013 at 5:28 am #

    Thank you so much. But I have a question, I have only had sex once (not because i’m scared, because of pain yada yada yada) and it was over a year ago. I have fingered myself once from it, that’s it. And I can’t use tamps, so I’m pretty tight. Do you have any tips for this? For me to get comfortable fingering myself better? Thanks.

    • Sean Jameson May 27, 2013 at 9:57 am #

      Hi Sierra,
      The first thing you should do is use lots of lube. This will help everything to slide in and out much more easily. The next thing you need to understand is that the more your stretch it, the looser it will get. Just make sure that you don’t hurt yourself when doing it.
      Sean

  18. CM July 10, 2013 at 9:11 pm #

    Sean,

    thank you so much for this site… I’ve never really got anything from masturbating, so just never bothered… then I discovered your site, read your tips…

    i tried and for the first time, managed to make myself cum

    thank you… now I just need to try those bj skills ;)

    xx

  19. Cassie July 15, 2013 at 5:48 am #

    I’ve been fingering myself for awhile now and I get close to orgasming. I never seem to be able to do it though. Why? My boyfriend tells me to relax and I try to but I seem to have a natural tension from the pleasure, if that makes sense. Please help??

    • Sean Jameson July 16, 2013 at 7:08 am #

      Hi Cassie,
      That natural tension is a good thing. You’ll find that if you keep going (while focusing on what is pleasurable), then the tension will build and build until it reaches a peak and then quickly dissipates. This peak is orgasm!

      Sean

  20. lisa August 6, 2013 at 4:52 pm #

    What if our arms are too short to reach your gspot?

    • Sean Jameson August 12, 2013 at 8:46 am #

      Hi Lisa,
      If this is the case, then you may want to try using a toy like a dildo.

      Sean

  21. linzie September 5, 2013 at 9:37 pm #

    Hi sean, I used to cum really easily but now I get to the point where I’m about to then it just disappears, what’s the best thing to do

    • Sean Jameson September 8, 2013 at 7:04 pm #

      Hi Linzie,

      I’m not sure. Have you started/stopped any medications recently. This is often the cause.

  22. Aria September 12, 2013 at 11:17 am #

    I’m sorry I ment does your hem have to be broken to hit your g-spot

    • Sean Jameson September 16, 2013 at 7:56 am #

      Hi Aria,
      No the hymen doesn’t necessarily have to be broken in order to hit your G Spot.
      Sean

  23. Eddie September 27, 2013 at 6:54 am #

    Im a 25 yr old male.
    I love n prefer to eat pussy cant get enough of the scent n wetness!
    Im an oral addict!
    Is this normal?

    • Sean Jameson September 30, 2013 at 4:28 pm #

      Hi Eddie,
      Sounds pretty normal to me.
      Sean

  24. emraan September 29, 2013 at 10:02 am #

    i tried fingured to my girlfriend. but she said she get very pain. so i i cant fucked her

  25. laurenj October 13, 2013 at 7:52 am #

    Hi sean,
    ive had many clitoral orgasms before but when I finger myself I get no pleasure from it…is this normal and what can I do to sort it?
    Thanks.

    • Sean Jameson November 11, 2013 at 8:24 pm #

      Hi Lauren,

      I always advise students to keep trying, without putting any emphasis on having an orgasm. A much better strategy is to take your time, try different things and only focus on what feels good.

      Sean

  26. MelissaM December 24, 2013 at 9:24 pm #

    My boyfriend has tried fingering me, and I didn’t find hardly any pleasure. It just hurt. A lot! A lot a lot. I wanted him to and I was wet?? I thought maybe it was just him…so I tried fingering myself and didn’t get anything from it. It didn’t feel that great. Any advise? I’m going to try stuff of this page too, thanks xoxo (:

    • Sean Jameson January 9, 2014 at 11:53 am #

      Hi Melissa,
      The goal isn’t just to ‘finger yourself’. It’s to rub yourself in a way that’s pleasurable. The main thing to focus on is doing what you find most pleasurable.

      Sean

  27. benu January 2, 2014 at 6:11 am #

    Can u tell me the side effects of self fingering & if I will enter two fingers at a time will it harm my hymen.

    • Sean Jameson January 9, 2014 at 11:42 am #

      Hi Benu,

      It potentially can harm your hymen, but it all depends on how much pressure your use. I wish I could be more detailed, but the truth is that it really depends.

      Sean

  28. Anonymous January 7, 2014 at 7:18 am #

    Hi Sean….well I’ve fingered myself for a while now. I did it tonight and I still haven’t cummed. It felt really close tho my legs were shaky. But nothing came out I did this for a good half hour still nothing but I really want to…any advice/help????

    • Sean Jameson January 9, 2014 at 11:30 am #

      Don’t focus on the outcome (making yourself orgasm). Just focus on enjoying yourself.

      Sean

  29. Nicole January 8, 2014 at 6:19 am #

    Hi Sean,

    So, I’m pretty sure I found my G-spot, but every time I try to stimulate it, my bladder engorges and eventually I pee. Is there any way to avoid this?

    Thanks,
    Nicole

  30. Shannon January 22, 2014 at 9:32 am #

    Hey Sean
    Great site!
    I was thinking of trying this, i have tried to finger myself before but i get no please if not stinging. I dont use tampons i feel im too tight to fit them and it hurts and feels dry although i have tried. I also dont get very wet if at all so fingering is dry and hurts. And even if i do get wet when i try to finger myself i simply get bored and ‘dry up’ and im so worried that because i cant use tampons cause im tight i wont be able to ‘fit’ a penis.. i dont know what im doing wrong!!
    Please help me! :(

    • Sean Jameson January 27, 2014 at 7:54 am #

      Hi Shannon,

      This doesn’t sound like a massive problem. You can cure the dryness issue by using a bit of lube. You may want to talk to your doctor about the excessive tightness however, it could potentially be something like vaginismus.

      Sean

  31. emma March 7, 2014 at 6:59 pm #

    Omg it was amazing wish someone would do it to me in stead of me doing myself

  32. sexy March 27, 2014 at 3:16 am #

    Thank you so much I fucked my gf the other day and she fuckin cummed so hard im gonna fuck her every night

  33. rolop March 31, 2014 at 5:59 am #

    hi sean,
    so im in love with my gf and i want to give to her. how do i kno shes ready?

  34. elly March 31, 2014 at 7:55 am #

    AHHHHHH! your advice give me some pleasure!

  35. lady April 2, 2014 at 8:10 am #

    sean please give me some insight if you can! I can’t even get myself to finger myself it’s a really terrible issue and I understand the reason is me and only me but why do I feel this way?

    I’m not the biggest fan of the vagina though I appreciate my own. however, there is nothing that gets me to touch myself down there (and I’ve even considered wearing a surgical glove before trying to do so) to me that’s just wrong and I’d love to form a personal connection with my vagina but I just can’t bring myself to do it…

    • Sean Jameson April 2, 2014 at 9:13 am #

      Hi,

      Sounds like a tough situation to be in and there could be many potential causes for you feeling this way: past experiences, repression, shame, etc. It may be best to talk to a doctor or therapist about this.

      Sean

  36. Emma April 17, 2014 at 11:58 pm #

    I was fingering myself last night, but got no pleasure at all. I really want an amazing orgasm, but I don’t seem to enjoy fingering

  37. Shaunine April 21, 2014 at 5:45 am #

    Ok I try to masterbate but I cant can you give steps for say like ok now once you’ve rubbed there for 2mis than start fingering your self plz plz it would help

    • Sean Jameson April 21, 2014 at 12:15 pm #

      Hi Shaunine,

      The truth is that different people enjoy and get off to different sensations, so you’re going to need to do a lot of experimentation to discover what you enjoy the most.

      Have fun!

      Sean

  38. Jane May 5, 2014 at 12:06 am #

    This totally helped me I finger myself so much now and I organism like crazy thank you
    I always wear thongs before, to get myself feeling sexy

  39. Christina May 14, 2014 at 5:05 am #

    I cannot fit more than 1 of my fingers in my vagina. I tried to put 2 but it hurt. Any help

  40. courtney May 31, 2014 at 2:01 pm #

    Can you get pregnant from this

  41. Alice June 13, 2014 at 3:16 am #

    Hi so I use a vibrator often and I have it on my favorite setting but I never have an orgasam so why is this am I using it the wrong way?8

    • Sean Jameson June 16, 2014 at 6:17 am #

      Hi Alice,

      It’s hard for me to tell as different people have different levels of sensitivities. The main thing is to keep focusing on what feels pleasurable and not worrying about the outcome. If using your vibrator isn’t that pleasurable, then just switch back to using your hand or whatever technique you usually use when masturbating.

      Sean

  42. CassieK July 9, 2014 at 11:59 am #

    Hi Sean,
    I’ve tried to use to fingers before and it hurts but when I use one it feels like nothing is in there any ideas on what might help me? Xx

    • Sean Jameson July 13, 2014 at 4:19 pm #

      Hi Cassie,

      You might find that you need to use a bit of lube to make it easier for yourself.

  43. Shayla July 11, 2014 at 3:34 am #

    Should it feel like gushing water? I dunnnnooo

  44. Audrey. July 21, 2014 at 6:00 pm #

    Hello, Sean! :)
    Actually, I have tried fingering lots of times and have always tried finding the G-Spot. I have tried searching in the internet for how the G-Spot actually felt like. Everytime I feel like I have found it, I certainly feel unsure about it. I just don’t think it is the right one. That is the reason why I came to this website though. I wanted my fingering session to be pleasurable for me. Also, I have never squirted before! Regarding of this, I just feel insecure about myself. I don’t know whether it is that I can’t squirt or am I doing the wrong thing. So, please help me amd give me suggestions about this. :) Thankyou!

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