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While this guide is going to teach you how to find your G Spot, men will learn a lot from reading it too. I’m also going to explain the simple reason why some women have trouble finding it.
So, if you have trouble finding your G Spot, read the entire guide, and you’ll learn how to find it and why you were having trouble finding it in the first place.
Side note: If you are currently struggling to orgasm during sex or masturbation, then you may want to learn about the Easy Orgasm Solution. It begins by teaching you the techniques to orgasm easily and consistently. Then you'll learn how to have multiple vaginal and full body orgasms during sex and masturbation. You can find out more here.
Podcast: Finding Your G Spot & Squirting
Before you continue, you may be interested in listening to this podcast where you’ll learn how to find your G Spot and stimulate it for squirting orgasms.
Listen to more Bad Girls Bible podcast episodes here
Now on to the important question…
Where Is The G Spot?
If you check out the diagram above, you can see that it’s located about 2-3 inches (5-7.5cm) inside the vagina on the anterior wall (the side of your vagina closest to your belly) [1].
When you touch your G Spot, it will feel slightly different to the rest of you vagina. It should feel like the top of your palate in your mouth but softer. So it should feel slightly dimpled, but very soft to touch.
If you want to give your man back-arching, toe-curling, screaming orgasms that will keep him sexually addicted to you, then you'll find them in my private and discreet newsletter. You'll also learn the 5 dangerous & "dumb" sex mistakes that turn him off and how to avoid them. Get it here.
To find your G Spot with your fingers, just slide your palm down your stomach, with your palm touching your stomach, all the way down to your vagina. Then enter your vagina with 1 or 2 fingers and curl those fingers backward once they are 2-3 inches deep inside you. You should now be able to feel your G Spot on your fingertips. This diagram below should help:
I Still Don’t Know How To Find My G Spot….Help Me!
The location of the G Spot is the same for all women…however some women have severe difficulty figuring out how to find the G Spot. They might even feel like they were born without one!
Don’t worry! First, I’m going to explain why you can’t find your G Spot and then I’ll cover what you can do to locate it.
Why You Can’t Find Your G Spot. Hint: It’s Not Your Fault
The reason for many women believing that they can’t find their G Spot is because you need to be aroused to find it. If you are not thoroughly aroused, then you are going to have difficulty finding your G Spot or getting any pleasure from it. For example, if your gynecologist happens to press on or massage your G Spot area during an exam, you’re not going to feel much because you won’t be aroused. But if you are turned on and your partner touches your G Spot, then it will feel incredibly pleasurable.
This is even reported in scientific journals, here’s a quote from Elsevier’s dictionary[2]:
The G-spot is not felt normally during a gynecological exam, because the area must be sexually stimulated in order for it to swell and be palpable; physicians, of course, do not sexually arouse their patients and, therefore, do not typically find the woman’s G-spot.
But why?
Why You Need To Be Aroused – There is an area just above your G Spot called the urethral sponge. Your urethral sponge contains a gland called your Skene’s gland which engorges and fills with fluid as you become aroused [4]. As the Skene’s gland swells and expands more and more, it causes the G Spot to become sensitive and protrude, becoming more prominent in your vagina.
I have indicated the Skene’s gland in light purple below. As you get turned on the Skene’s gland swells with fluid, which causes the G Spot to become more sensitive and makes it more prominent in the vagina.
Quick Quiz: Do You Give Good Blow Jobs?
If you are new here, then you may want to take the quiz below to learn how good you are at giving oral sex and satisfying your man. You may discover you that you suck (pun intended) or that you are already a blow job queen.
So if you are not turned on, then your G Spot will not be swollen or sensitive, and so it’s not going to be as easy to find. This means that if you are having trouble finding your G Spot, make sure to get thoroughly aroused beforehand if you are alone…and if you are with your man, then make sure to have lots of foreplay first. This way you’ll be aroused enough to easily able to find it.
Why You Still Can’t Find Your G Spot. Hint: It’s Still Not Your Fault
Ok, so maybe you’ve followed my tips so far and even used some of these masturbation techniques to get super-crazy aroused yet still can’t find your G Spot. Here’s why:
The size of the Skene’s gland varies quite considerably from woman to woman. If you have a tiny Skene’s gland, then your G Spot will never get that sensitive or protrude much, even when you are highly aroused, making it next to impossible to have a G Spot orgasm. This is also backed up by science: When experiments were performed, some women were found to have no Skene’s gland at all [3], which means that their G Spot could never become sensitive or swollen.
Don’t worry, plenty of women who can’t figure out how to find the G Spot still have incredible sex live thanks to the multitude of other ways you can orgasm. These clitoral stimulation techniques, masturbation tips, even more masturbation techniques and these techniques for fingering yourself should be more than enough to stay sexually satisfied.
I Figured Out How To Find My G Spot, Now What!?
If you have followed all my advice above and discovered how to find your G Spot, then it’s time to start enjoying all the pleasure that it can bring. First, I’m going to cover briefly the best techniques you can use to stimulate your G Spot on your own (you’ll find more here), then I’ll talk about the best sex positions to use for stimulating your G Spot.
G Spot Self Pleasure
Once you’ve found your G Spot a great technique to use to stimulate it is a variation of this diagram at the start of the guide. While rubbing and massaging your G Spot with one hand, you can use your other hand to stimulate your clitoris like in the diagram below. Perfect for doubling your pleasure:
There are also three distinct G Spot massage techniques that I teach here in the article on making yourself squirt.
Maximizing G Spot Stimulation – Angle & Depth
When having sex with your man (or using a dildo), one thing you will naturally want to do is maximize the level of stimulation your G Spot receives. This all comes down to the angle that your man enters your vagina at and how deep he is inside you. This first diagram will give you an idea of how deep and at what angle your man should penetrate you to ensure he hits your G Spot.
But if you find that this angle doesn’t provide enough pressure, then he should penetrate you at an even more extreme angle like the one below. The same goes when you are using a dildo on yourself. Tips on how to use a dildo for maximum pleasure here.
Sex Positions To Stimulate Your G Spot
Now that you’ve learned how to find your G Spot and how to rub and massage it, it’s time to learn some sex positions that you can use to provide maximum stimulation to it during sex. Rather than covering every single one of the 119 sex positions that you will find here, I’ve narrowed it down to the best 4.
A quick reminder: It’s important to remember that as your G Spot is only 2-3 inches deep, most guys will need to be quite shallow in your vagina. Some guys might even feel like they are about to ‘pop out’ of your vagina a lot of the time when trying to stimulate your G Spot.
G Spot
The G Spot gets it’s name because it’s as if your man’s only mission is to target your G Spot precisely. The most important thing here to focus on is the angle of your body and how deep you take your man. So play around with how far you raise your hips off the ground. Check out the main G Spot position guide for more tips on this position.
Crab
The Crab is fantastic for hitting your G Spot, especially if you enjoy being on top during sex. You can learn more about the Crab position.
Rear Entry
The Rear Entry position is great if you like your man doing most of the work to hit your G Spot. However, to truly hit your G Spot and stimulate it correctly, he’s going to need to follow some specific instructions…
Instead of simply thrusting in and out of you, he’s going to need to use more of a grinding motion. When he grinds forward/up on you, his hips will move forward, and this will cause the head of his penis to ‘stroke’ your G Spot, provided he’s not too deep. If he grinds too far forward, his penis will ‘pop out’ of your vagina. As always make sure to talk to your man so you can let him know exactly where your G Spot is, so he can adjust his stroke accordingly.
Teaspooning
Teaspooning is so nice if you like your man being able to wrap his arms around you and hold you close during sex. It’s also a great position to hit your G Spot.
Of course, you can try any number of positions. Some people find that doggie style works well for G-spot stimulation. Others find that being tied up with knees toward their chest does the job.
Interesting in bondage? Learn what BDSM is and how it can benefit your sex life.
Don’t Confuse Your G Spot With Your A Spot
Some women don’t know that they have another super sensitive area deeper in their vagina. It’s your A Spot also known as the anterior fornix erogenous zone [6]. Your A Spot is located on the anterior wall of your vagina like your G Spot (that’s the side of your vagina closest to your stomach), but it’s much deeper than your G Spot. Sometimes this can lead to confusion when you are figuring out how to find your G Spot. You can see it’s location in the diagram below.
Stimulating the A Spot also feels incredible, but slightly different to having your G Spot stimulated. Most guys will be able to reach it with their fingers and can use the same techniques as I described above to stimulate it. However, you may find that your fingers aren’t long enough, and you have to use a dildo or something similar to reach it. Tips on using a dildo for powerful orgasms here.
So if you discover that you don’t enjoy shallow stimulation (2-3 inches deep) where you G Spot is located but instead prefer it much deeper, then most likely your A Spot is more sensitive than your G Spot. Wikipedia has more great info on the A Spot [5].
I Need To Pee Every Time I Stimulate My G Spot….Help!?!?
Once you discover how to find your G Spot, you may notice a “need to pee” feeling every time you stimulate it [7]. Feeling like you need to pee is perfectly fine and should even be expected. Women get this feeling because your bladder is located right beside your G Spot. Take a look at the illustration above to get an idea of what I’m talking about. So when you are pressing on your G Spot with your fingers or a dildo or even his penis, you are also going to put some pressure on your bladder too. Hence, the “need to pee” feeling. The most helpful thing you can do to prevent this “need to pee” feeling is to pee before sex or masturbation.
Additionally, as I explain in the guide on making yourself squirt, the fluid that you ejaculate when you squirt travels through the same that tube you pee from [8]. This fluid comes from your Skene’s gland. But because it goes through the same tube as your pee, you may feel like you are peeing if you happen to squirt while rubbing your G Spot.
So now that you know how to find your G Spot, you’re probably going to be interested in getting the most pleasure possible from it. This guide on how to finger yourself will help, as will this one and this one on using a dildo will help a lot as well. The squirting guide will also show you and your man everything you need to know about female ejaculation during sex, and he can learn how to make you orgasm here.
You tips were wonderful infact I learnt so much from them thanks.
I need help as much as we try I don’t have an orgasm :/ I feel hopeless
Watch porn and play with your clit ???? It should work
I don’t have them either. I’ve tried everything. It really sucks.
Go for a Yoni massage
What is a yoni massage and where do I go to get one
More on yoni massage
You said as much as “we” try. I never orgasmed with a partner until I had figured out my body on my own, and that took quite awhile for me. Don’t be shy about taking time on your own to figure out what you like before you’ll know how to communicate it to anyone else.
Maybe its him not you
That’s not uncommon, unfortunately. As many as 15% of women never orgasm. The number continues to grow.
But don’t despair
I was never able to make myself orgasm until I was given a womanizer. I was never able to orgasm with a partner until I was with the same partner who gave me the womanizer. Funny how that works out.
You can still enjoy sex, but in my experience a lot of the issues I was having were related to deeper psychological issues like body positivity and self worth. Along with sex partners who did not value me or my pleasure. (NOT saying that is your situation)
Moral of the story: Don’t freak out, have fun, and pay attention to your body and be vocal about what you need.
I really enjoyed the information, I know know I GET BETTER arousal thru the A spot. I look the fingering action. this website is so honest and helpful. I have been experiencing certain activities that pleasure me for years but just didnt put the politically correct names to the positions and actions.
Wonderful blog! For me the A-spot is definitely simulating! My lover had me suddenly clawing at his back when he hit mine with his fingers!
wow that feels amazing and especially the taste!
That was amazing ur like a sex god thank you. Ill be sure to send this link to my fiancé.
I found my G-spot, but soon after that, I peed on my floor! Is actually peeing normal?
Hi Megan, yes it can happen. Although you may find that it’s actually not pee, but female ejaculate. You can tell because it smells different.
Sadly, it won’t work for me. I find my G-spot, but I won’t orgasm. HELP!?
Hi Miriam, try making yourself super turned on first. The more turned on and aroused you are, the easier it will be to have a G Spot orgasm. Like with any type of orgasm, the key is not focusing on the orgasm itself. Instead focus on what feels most pleasurable and the orgasm will just happen.
Best article I’ve found on the subject. I found that using my middle and ring fingers are much better than middle and index fingers. I do think the palm of my hand was indirectly hitting my clitoris, so I’ll try again because I really want to orgasm with my g-spot! Next up ..squirting! Lol
Ii have no idea if ir is my g spot. I usually masturbate internally (I walk two fingers firmly across the front wall of my vagina) and come hard. I also come from the same spot using a dildo (especially my extra girthy one)
My husband is smaller than average (length and girth). The only way I ever come is missionary (he prefers doggy). It usually doesn’t feel as intense as when I come from my fingers so I suspect it is just the clitoris rubbing. If I rub my clit to come it is usually quick, less intense and I don’t want another orgasm (too sensitive). Internal orgasms make my body convulse and I repeat after a minute or two.
In doggy, it is almost like I could ask if it is in. Seriously. I absolutely love any position where he is right about to fall out, but then he does frequently and it hurts him.
I really, really want to be able to come like I do from my fingers, but during sex with my husband, preferably in doggy, but really anything where he won’t fall out and hurt himself.
Please help!
Make him use a dong cover. Itll make him any length you want plus he gets to find out what a mental orgasm feels like
My advice to you is, take your husband to bed a little early one night. To spend some alone time. Startup a little foreplay and when you get good and aroused. Take the time to teach, to your husband how to use his fingers to find your G-spot. Once he is found it. Then it’s up to you to teach him how to stimulate it.Most women that I have been with prefers short Strokes and firm pressure with is finger well manicured and well lubricated. increasing his speed and extending his stroke reaching theA spot.moving back and forth between the g spot and the A spot. Useing one inch storkes Ipromise you will have a a mind-blowing orgasm and you might even squirt. ?When he learns where and how to stimulate your G-spot with fingers.It will be so easy for him to find it with his penis and he will all ready know how to stimulate your spot. Best regards
Just thought I would add that g spot sniper and bucking bronco are on his list of hated positions because I end up pressing too hard into him until he falls out painfully.
Sorry to hear that Leanne. Fortunately there are over 100 others that you can try.
Sean
Hi, I need advice. I just simply cannot get turned on, even if I relax. I’ve never orgasmed by myself or during sex. I’ve kind of given up on the whole thing.
Hi Marcia, it might be a good idea to talk to your doctor about this. There could be a range of issues affecting your ability to get turned on like stress, certain medications or even a medical condition.
Try clinching (like when your doing kegals). You need to find what turns you on and then clinch.. Focus on the sensation you are having verse trying to find your G or A spot. Most women find their clit easier to get pleasure from. Excersising the vaginal muscles will help you get to the big O faster as well. I usually feel nothing unless I focus on clinching and the tighter I clinch with clitoral stimulation the closer I get to the big O.
Hope that helps
I have only ever orgasmed during sex once, on top, really focusing. I’m not sure if it was A spot or G spot orgasm. I’m trying by myself as my hubby would be hurt if he helped and it didn’t work. I think I can feel my G spot, but not sure. Any other advice aside from being turned on? Thanks!
There are 2 big things to focus on to become super turned on. The first is relaxing completely and being stress free. The second is understanding what your body responds to (fantasies, specific scenarios, penetration, soft pressure on your clit, etc). Both of these take practice. You can only find what your body responds to through trial and error…so try out a number of different techniques and ideas and play close attention to what makes your body respond most strongly.
My man hits my a spot with his cock. I can have multiple orgasms and he says when I do it squeezes the hell out of his cock. It’s awesome!
10 years ago before I married my wife, I promised her she will never be or become a wife in need. However I feel her G-Spot is like Waldo, only finding it once in a while. I have read many many articles on how to get her spot, only to find that they were flawed. Tonight or tomorrow is our wine night, so I’m very excited to put your article to use ! Thank you very much !!
PS.
This is the absolute best article I have read on the subject !
Cool article, I’ll definitely use it on my girl, BUT one thing I noticed is how you always assume hetero relationships! Not every penis-bodied person is a man, and not every dildo-using person is a woman. You really ought to look over that in your articles.
Sam, as you travel the internet you’ll find all kinds of resources that don’t bend over backward to accommodate your worldview. That’s why you have a brain capable of abstract, inductive thinking. Take what is of use, apply it to your situation, and be grateful. Finding a micro-aggression behind every other pixel is a choice.
Crispin, your nasty attitude regarding a legitimate concern is rife with bigotry that festers permanently in our cisgender, heterosexual-focused society. It’s the LGBTQ community that have to bend over backwards to accommodate a cisgender, heterosexual worldview. That’s why most movies feature heterosexual and cisgender characters and most articles like these focus exclusively on these privileged beings, making it damn near impossibe for the LGBTQ folk to obtain adequate representation. Your ignorance does nothing but impede upon the inclusion progress and contributes to exclusion and oppressive values. Grow up and educate yourself.
I know this thread is very old, but I just have to know… why do a lot of the LGBTQ community go so hard on small issues such as this when your human rights are being violated in so many other ways? This is a site dedicated to people born with a female reproductive system… hence the name of the site and the mention of a vagina repeatedly. Everything is not going to be for you! Women have been oppressed for a long time as well, so to infiltrate something catered to us and try to find fault with it is too much. I’m a born woman… BLACK woman in a relationship with a trans woman, in the deep south, so pump your breaks and approach calmly with your reply. I was born with way more strikes against me than you, I’m sure. I mean, the nerve! Why would a heterosexual make be obligated to accommodate a group he knows nothing about, and why would you want them to? To have more to complain about, I’d imagine. Im not seeking out natural hair care tips on a Caucasian website called White Girl’s Bible. The original poster didn’t even go this deep! And the guy you responded to didn’t say anything wrong, so stop fishing for a cause. Im old school, gay is gay. And we really had something to fight for in the past few decades. You new gays kill me. This is what we fought for? For extra letters and blog verbiage🤦🏾♀️ I thought I was fighting to not get beat to death walking my dog. And YOU should educate yourself on THAT and the fact that I bet you can’t name a show/ movie without a gay character. Nobody’s bending over backwards to accommodate anything hetero, so being so dramatic.
Nice ! Well explained !
Amen to that!
The website is called “Badgirlsbible”.
I was wondering how do I get myself turn on so I can find g spot
Try these tips.
woow i like this article,i ve learnt much of g’spot,but how many centimetre an A spot found
I have never orgaism nor squirt and I need it as woman please help me
I have never orgasm just on clit when he is inside me and I touch myself. Gets deep inside tho. I need help or any suggestions cause I feel inside but is not as pleasent as the clit. Any pills may help? Do you think birth pills could be the possibility of not come?
It’s hard to tell as there are multiple types of birth control pills. If you are worried, then your best bet is to talk to your doctor.
Very interesting forum. Thanks. While stimulating a partner recently a few of the above topics arose. She was wet from the get go – so much so that I think she squirted, particularly as she went to the toilet a few times. I found what I now realise was her g spot, but as her reactions didn’t change returned to the classic ‘come hither’ fingering technique. She didn’t orgasm, and neither did she point me towards her clitoris. What I’d like to know is if intense wetness can preclude orgasm in some cases, and is it ok to use all fingers and thumb at the same time, when she gave all signs of enjoying the former. Ta.
Absolutely. My advice above is merely a guideline (not some law set in stone). However, everyone has their preferences so my advice is to get feedback from your partner and go with what works best for both of you.
I don’t know either I have a problem or my girlfriend have …every time when we have sex she always gave me half round , I don’t even ejaculate so I’ve tryed to talk to her about am I reach or hit a g-spot right ? She said yes …! But she can’t finish a session .. she keep on coming back for more and my penis is 7 inch
So I will like to know what’s her problem …? Why she can’t finish a session
I love doing it with myself a lot less fun than with another person called a naked sex guy
Omg I’m so happy I came across this article! Thank you! I think for the first time in my life I finally found my g-spot. I think the advice about being aroused is so spot on. I think I got lucky with two orgasms. Both times I felt I had to pee, but I had made sure I used the bathroom before I started. Im glad I had a towel under me. I never squirted before and I felt like I squirted both times. Is that normal? Are vaginal orgasms usually more liquidy/messier than clitoral orgasms??
Congratulations! They can be if you squirt.
I know this article was posted a LONG time ago but this literally helped me so much. It’s like a wall has been crushed / broke down in my mind and I’m thinking clearly. Immense pleasure, happiness, euphoria! Oh my god, I am so happy.
Daamn that’s so awesome this is really helpful
Hey i have an 5.1 cock and i never come up to the A spot, how deep is it there?
Its next to the cervix
I’m confused, isn’t the A spot near the cervix?
Yet it says that some people can reach it with their fingers.
If women in porn can take a 7+ inch penis all tbe way like its no problem then how would you reach the deeps of your vagina with just your finger? The G stop is 2-3 inches which is about the same as a finger so you can reach it, but how do you reach to the A spot with your 2-3 inch fingers..
Your cervix actually moves up/down depending upon where the person is in their cycle, so going off that, it would make sense that then the a-spot may also shift accordingly. Also, porn is not an accurate or healthy standard or representation of sex
Hi I can never reach an orgasm I have tried all different things from toys to positions I’m def turned on thats not an issue any suggestions tia
Read the Orgasm Guide.
I get it, I don’t get the diagram though. It’s confusing.
Love the article. Anxious to try it with my partner when we get together again. Lots of good advice.
Your site allowed me to find my G spot and have my first G spot orgasm at 49. It was amazing. Can’t wait to be able to mastrabate again, won’t be too long.
My partner always orgasm especially with missionary technique, at first it was impossible but after going through this article together, she started experiencing G-spot orgasm. Sex is now great and occasionally we climax together which is a mind blowing experience. Thanks a million!
Ok i have a problem my girlfriend of 3 1/2 years is 5’4 and im 6’9 we have great sex but it could take 2 hours to get her off and thats manual and oral ok so now the problem or curse I was blessed with a penisthe size of a water bottle a lot of the time she says its painful not matter how wet or how much Lube has been used also there are times when she will bleed how can I make it more enjoyable for her thank you
I was worried I thought there’s something wrong with me. And as I read through this article. I read “foreplay” more to be aroused. I guess this is my problem. My man doesn’t know how to foreplay at all. He think it’s just the same as having intercourse. And I never told him that I never feel anything at all. ???…….I’m in a verge of just having someone else to experience it with.. and I know it’s not right. But I am trying to tell him the best that I can.
I am finding it difficult to locate the G spot of my wife.
can you assist me.
It’s all there in the guide, but make sure to talk to your wife as well and get her feedback.
i have a bf i been with nearly 10 years he dont live with me he lives in scotland as he moved from birmingham for his job in scotland i never had a problem when i was with my ex partner and now i feel useless i can get wet etc and get turned on by his penis but when we have sex etc nothink happensother then my whole body shakes i was talking to my bf earlier but i feel not good enough and yet we still together i was abused by my ex partner and now i feel like a useless woman he loves me and i loves him but am struggling my bf asked me questions this morning and i told him months ago i cant orgasm and he sed we work on it but i cant cope and i want to make this happen again i am listening to the video of you talking now while i type this out am deeply hurting as i not good enough after the abuse i went through with my ex but then i never ever had a problem i feel as if it all been taken away from me and that but i aint willing to give up as my boyfriend dont want to loose me cos he understands alot with what i gone through am sat here crying my eyes out i am 48 my boyfriend is 30 and he such a good guy and i love him with all my heart i just feel as if there somethink wrong with me i got no one else to talk too cant go to my family or friends cos they dont understand they dont listen i dont bother with my family at all 🙂
My current boyfriend is really hot and has good size and girth but no matter what I’m not able to orgasm! I can hit my G Spot by myself but he isn’t able to do it, niether with his fingers nor cock. I never had this problem with any other previous partners, please help !!
Sounds like you need to talk to him!
I have learned a lot from your bible
I don’t feel any thing when I put my finger inside my vagina I literally don’t feel any pleasure, I cannot find my G Spot and I don’t feel good at all like when I touch my cilt , I don’t know what to do , this is making me really sad and afraid, please help me .
Check out the guide on how to orgasm Mora, it should help.
I learned blowjob from your bible
Thankyou for this article! Relaxation and comfortability is definitely important especially if you are just learning how to squirt. I’ve been with my boyfriend for roughly 5 years and I always made him stop before I could orgasm (that wasn’t clitoral) because I felt the pee sensation and didn’t realise it was normal to feel that, and I couldn’t quite relax when experiencing it, but tonight I made sure I went to the bathroom right before, relax as much as I could and let my man do his thing and wow! We were both very impressed and shocked that I really could squirt. Very helpful article.
Happy to help!
I need to know how to find the man’s prostate. HELP
Our guide to prostate massage will teach you.
hey! so i tried to finger myself for the first time and i’m not sure about something. what i was doing was that with my middle and ring finger i was fingering myself while with my other hand i was rubbing my clit. after i felt like i was like stress-free or relaxed and then i decided to stop. while i was trying to stand, my legs started shaking and i heard that if your legs start shaking then you orgasmed but i’m not sure. please help me!!
sounds like you orgasmsed. Was there a wave of pleasure?
Is it possible that some girls need both clitoral stimulation AND G Spot stimulation at the same time to have an orgasm? I’ve tried having just a G Spot orgasm, and it’s very hard. I found that when I masturbate I prefer to have either a toy or my fingers inside while I rub my clitorus to orgasm, but never just from g spot by iteself. I remember having one (g spot orgasm) with a previous partner, but now that I think about it, he was rubbing up against my clit while we were having sex, and bingo I had multiple body shaking orgasms and it was amazing! He was on top of me, and I had my legs wrapped around him. I’m with this guy now that I really like and care about. He’s amazing and I don’t want to disappoint him! I’ve been trying to figure out if I can have an orgasm from just penetration, but can’t seem to. It’s not him, he’s great, willing to learn and do whatever he can to help, I just can’t figure out what I am doing wrong here….Got any advice? I’ve definitely worked on turning myself on, and can do that before I masurbate. He definitely turns me on, and he’s given me several clitoral orgasms, but I need help with figuring out how I can have a G Spot orgasm. I go to the bathroom before we start doing anything, but whenever he puts his fingers inside, I feel like I have to go to the bathroom, but it’s not very pleasurable. It just feels like he has his fingers in me and that’s about it… What is going on? I’ve tried the G Spot masturbation techniques, including turning myself on by either watching porn, reading these articles online, or sexting with my man, but I struggle to come alone and with him (from my g spot). Please, I need advice and I need to know if some women just need to have both clitoral and G Spot stimulation at the same time. Also, is this “need to pee” feeling a good thing or is he just hitting my bladder because it makes me not able to relax, and I don’t really feel pleasure from it. It feels good for a little, but not great if that makes any sense.
Everyone experiences orgasm differently. To find your own perfect way to orgasm, you need to experiment by yourself first. Then once you know how to reliably make yourself orgasm, show your man what works for you.
First, TO ALL THE LADIES (sorry guys, your wiring is largely the same from one man to another and much more isolated and simplistic)–our pelvic nerve arrangements are all different. YES—all. There are huge highways of neural wiring all throughout our pelvises, connecting to all our genital parts. Some women have their wiring well distributed, and feel more pleasure broadly throughout all their pleasure parts. Other women have their neural wiring focused on one or a few areas. Women CAN get pleasure from their A spot, O spot, PS spot, Anus, Cervix, G-spot, Clitoris (and the much larger entire clitoral structure), and the vestibule and/or vestibular bulbs. So, just if you have good feeling in one area, but not in another, it may be due to your wiring. Read Naomi Wolf’s book: Vagina and it will be eye opening. HOWEVER (!!!), you can improve your neural wiring by teaching your body how to receive pleasure more from certain spots.
Here’s how:
Let’s say, just for an example, you can orgasm like a champ and reliably from your own clitoral stimulation, or from a toy. Great…that is has been reinforced by your brain as a pleasure point and your neural wiring is likely firing very strongly when stimulation occurs. Then, let’s say you want to learn to have a G-spot orgasm. You have some feeling, but it never seems to build to an orgasm. Here’s what you will do. You will get your G-spot stimulated (and the Skene’s gland rock hard beneath it) with your hand or a toy, then touch your clit as you normally world. Do this a few times to the point of orgasm. You are now telling your body to associate an orgasm with in conjunction with the G-spot. After you have done this for a while, do the same G-spot turn on, then start touching your clit, (and keep stroking the G-spot too), at the moment you start to cum from your clit, stop touching it and keep touching your G-spot to try to keep the orgasm going. Maybe the first couple of times, you get a few muscle contractions into your orgasm stimulating both spots, before you stop touching your clit. Once you stop touching your clit, really focus mentally on the feeling in your G-spot and tell yourself you ARE cumming from your G-spot. Touch your clit less and less and train your G-spot to orgasm. It’s 50% mental, plus building neural pathways and feeling the full amount of feeling, along with training your brain and body to recognize your G-spot’s orgasmic potential. The same thing will work with enough commitment to learning to orgasm vaginally (if you don’t currently) learning to orgasm from doggie style, or anal and so on. Teach your body its potential.
Also, for women who think they have a mental block, tantric breathing can be a life saver. it’s not hard to do. Relax your body and only focus on your breathing. Make a small “Ahh” or Uhhh” noise as you breath out while fully relaxing your throat (which is connected neurally to your vagina). If you focus enough on your breathing, you cannot think about distractions, and it lets your body feel fully without the judgment and/or the thinking parts of the brain getting in the way. A great book to help teach you this is Sheri Winston’s “Women’s Anatomy of Arousal.” You can find both of these books used for fairly cheap on Amazon.
I am 53, and I just realized that for years, I was poisoning my bedroom (and hurting my husband’s self esteem too) with all the negative self-talk in my brain during foreplay and sex. He thought it was his incompetency, but it was really just me telling myself how ugly and unattractive I was. I no longer do it, and I cannot believe how easy it was to stop, and the breathing exercises have improved sex overall. I just learned last year to orgasm from both G-spot and clit stimulation. I am now working on training my G-spot to orgasm by itself. I know I have historically loved either my A-spot or my Cervix (it can cause orgasms too). I can’t differentiate which it is, but when I touch all 3 (G, Cervix and clit) holy cow…that is a powerful orgasm for the record book. Good luck.
Love your site. Only thing I have never seen covered is that just fyi – not every female likes receiving oral… but thoroughly enjoy giving it. I can actually orgasm just watching, seeing & hearing the pleasure being received by what I’m doing.
TY for doing what you do.
Great point, thanks for sharing Rita