I can't publish my most intense and wild sex tips online, so I send them in my private and discreet email newsletter. You can find out more here.
Keeping your man sexually satisfied and stopping him from straying is a high priority for most girls. The following 9 turns ons for guys will help you to keep your man turned on and thoroughly satisfied.
1. Your Appearance
I hate to be that person who asks you to make sure to dress sexy and look after your appearance, but the fact is that all guys are turned on mostly by what they see. This is something that you can pretend isn’t true and you can ignore it, but the fact is that guys are turned on by how you look, by your appearance. I’m absolutely not saying that you need to become a gym bunny or start wearing tons of make up or wearing super revealing clothing to attract and keep a guy.
Side note: If you are currently struggling to orgasm during sex or masturbation, then you may want to learn about the Easy Orgasm Solution. It will teach you how to have multiple vaginal and full body orgasms during sex and masturbation. It works even if you currently struggle to orgasm during sex or when masturbating. You can find out more here.
Related: How to look hot
I’m simply pointing out the fact that there are some very simple things you can do to make sure you are looking your best:
What You Wear – It’s not about wearing revealing clothes to turn your man on, it’s about wearing clothes that accent your best features. If you are naturally curvy and have and hourglass figure, then make sure to wear clothes that accent it. If you have a great pair of legs, then don’t hide them in a pair of baggy jeans, wear a skirt or pair of figure hugging trousers. If you look great in lingerie, then make sure to choose the perfect lingerie for your body. I hope your get the idea…
Your Hair & Make Up – More make up is not necessarily a good thing. Again, the key is to use make up to accent your good features and hide any blemishes. If you already have great skin, then there is no need to wear much foundation. But if you are having a bit of a break out, then feel free to wear some concealer to hide your spots.
The key is to experiment.
If you want to give your man back-arching, toe-curling, screaming orgasms that will keep him sexually addicted to you, then you'll find them in my private and discreet newsletter. You'll also learn the 5 dangerous & "dumb" sex mistakes that turn him off and how to avoid them. Get it here.
Try drawing more attention to your eyes with your make up one night when your out, then don’t draw so much attention to them the next. The same goes for how you do your hair, do you wear it up, leave it down, put it in a pony tail? Again, you should experiment to see what turns your man on the most.
2. Whatcha Say?
If you want a surefire way to turn your man on, then you need to start using some dirty talk in your conversations with him. If you have never tried dirty talk on your man before, then you will be surprised at the impact it can have in turning him on, keeping him thinking about you and building sexual tension with him.
One mistake that students often make with dirty talk is that they think they need to be super raunchy, trashy and even nasty when talking dirty. You certainly can be, but you don’t have to be. In fact, you can be subtle and very relaxed when using dirty talk on your man. The following statements are not ‘filthy’ sounding at all, but work great for turning your man on:
- I can’t wait to get you home tonight!
- There’s something really hot about seeing you in that pair of jeans!
- I wish there was nobody else here, that it was just you and me…
Now obviously, if you want, you can be really raunchy and explicit too if you want to turn him on:
- I can’t wait to feel you inside me later.
- I love feeling you on top of me, dominating me! Learn how to be submissive.
- I want to feel your cock in my mouth, while I suck you dry. Discover how to give a good blow job.
Try experimenting with both and see what works best for you. You can also use the 64 dirty talking examples on your man or try these 91 dirty things to say to a guy to turn him on.
3. Enthusiasm Really Is Contagious!
One of the main turn ons for guys is enthusiasm. When you are enthusiastic with your man as you are getting sexual with him, you are are showing him that he is arousing you and turning you on.
Why is this a good thing if the aim is to turn him on?
It’s simple…all guys have egos. Being enthusiastic about sex will massage his ego, it will make him feel attractive and desired. It may sound a little counter-intuitive, but it’s massively powerful for turning your man on.
Quick Quiz: Do You Give Good Blow Jobs?
If you are new here, then you may want to take the quiz below to learn how good you are at giving oral sex and satisfying your man. You may discover you that you suck (pun intended) or that you are already a blow job queen.
So how can you show your man that you are super enthusiastic about sex with him? Here are a few ways:
- Be more vocal (aka dirty talk)
- Lead & initiate sex with him, which I’ll talk more about later
- Don’t just lie there, get involved!
P.S. Your man should also know how to turn on a woman.
4. How You Movin’?
Like I said earlier, your appearance plays a big role when it comes to turning your boyfriend on. It’s one of my most important sex tips for women. Part of your appearance is how you move. Here are a few things to consider when examining how you move & how you can make it sexier…
- Do you make lots of quick, darting movements and always seem agitated. Or do you move slowly and gracefully through the room?
- Do you walk in such a way that accentuates your best assets. Or do you walk awkwardly in an unattractive way?
Try to think about these questions the next time you are at a party or are hanging out with your man.
Keep a look out: 17 signs that you are turning him on like crazy.
5. Fun & Flirty Or Dull & Boring?
One of the biggest turn ons for a guy is a girl who is fun and flirty to be around, not someone who asks 15 boring interview questions in a row! Besides reading my guide on how to flirt with a guy, how can you be more fun and flirty around your man? Here are a few simple things you can do:
- When you are chatting with your man, gently make fun of something he’s doing. It could be how he said something, how he holds his drink or even something about his clothes. The key to to be lighthearted, like you are joking around with your little brother. You aren’t trying to insult him, just tease him.
- Another way to flirt with a guy is to touch him a little bit more than normal. Try touching his arm when he says something funny or you could playfully push him away when he says something mean.
- Another great way to flirt with your man to turn him is to intentionally misinterpret what he says to you. For example, he might say something like: “I’m so tired, I can’t wait to go home”, you could pretend to misinterpret is him wanting to take you home and then call him on it. Again, remember to do it in a fun, flirty way.
- Flirting with text messages is also a great idea if you’re not together.
The key to flirting with you man to turn him on is remember that it’s a game, that it’s not supposed to be taken seriously. And don’t forget to watch out for the 13 signs that he is flirting with you.
6. How You Position Yourself (In Bed)
Another great way to turn your man on is start introducing new sex positions in the bedroom. This all ties in with my previous point about being enthusiastic with your man. By initiating new sex positions with your man, you are showing him how enthusiastic you are for sex with him.
If you’re currently nervous about trying positions like Cowgirl, you can overcome this and learn how to ride your man with confidence
7. New Sex Moves
Learning new sex positions are just a small part of the equation to having great sex with your man and turning him on. The other is learning new sex moves, whether they are new blow job techniques, handjob techniques or something that makes for kinkier sex.
8. Initiative & Gentle Dominance
Along with being enthusiastic and trying new sex techniques and positions, another turn on for your man is taking the initiative in the bedroom. So instead of showing him these new positions online or talking to him about trying out something new…just do it yourself.
Just grab him and change position in the bed. Or tell him to sit down on the couch and start deep throating your man without even mentioning it first. Your man will be surprised and very turned on.
Many women believe that doing something like giving their man a great blow job is a way to be submissive. It doesn’t necessarily have to! You can make sure your blowjob by following these domination tips.
9. Dirty Text Messages
The last turn on for guys that I want to discuss is sending your man dirty text messages. This is so that you can turn him when you’re not even with him. Just like with talking dirty, you don’t necessarily need to be filthy when sending sexy text messages, even subtle ones work really well at turning him on.
Now that you know what turns guys on, you should also learn these 26 things that turn your man off so that you can avoid them.
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So I have a concern about appearance. My hubby loves it when I wear my hair in pigtails, which is fine at home, but he really likes it when I wear it like that in public, which I really dont care for. I have more of a sophisticated look about me, and I really think it looks strange when I wear my hair like that in public…like a school girl. Any advice?
Hi Amber,
My advice: Talk to him. In the realm of relationship and sex problems, this is a really minor one. Just let him know that you enjoy doing it for him, but that you draw the line at doing it in public.
Best,
Sean
I would suggest doing it in public occasionally as well, but talk to him about limitations. For example, maybe on a date night out of town… away from those you want to keep a polished image for. It can be part of fun role play for both of you.
hi Amber, I have a suggestion..why don’t you try and go out on a picnic.. pick place where u feel comfortable and think that the pig tails and cute little dress or something is appropriate. during this outing play with your usual sexual banter or something and tell him how this is where you draw the line and that this won’t be a regular thing but maybe if your a good boy you might get such a surprise again ;)….hope you like the idea or it sparks one of your own. good luck..
One day when u know him n u r going to go some ware together put your hair in pig tails ware sumthin that will make him dubble back at you and when u get home tell him how gud hes ben to u tell him how proud u r to call him your man and give it to him how he likes it .
When your done tell him he can relive this day doubble the fun when his body can handdle it
From that point on keep your look thats what makes u u but tease him a bit put you hair up after u get out the shower but take it down n do it how u like when u leave out that way your teasing him then one day ware them out again when u know ylur going to b out alone n let him c u leave out like that when u get back let him take control
Any advice for women that don’t have high self esteem or don’t think they are that “hot”?
Hi Katie,
This is a complicated one. Honestly, I think the most important thing is finding a guy who accepts you for who you are. Don’t worry so much about pleasing the guy you’re with. Try to instead focus on simply enjoying yourself. And besides, life isn’t about being hot, it’s about having fun.
Sean
Hey Katie,
Let me give you a bit of advice that took me too long to learn. Im FINALLY comfortable with my body during sex but it has taken me until 40. I used to try to wear clothes during sex, try to cover my love handles or suck my stomach in to the point of exhaustion. I perpetually thought I, at a healthy 160 with DD tits, was a fat mess but it was only after I realized that my man wasnt lookin at my love handles, he was squeezing them and that he wanted me entirely naked, flaws and all, before I could could relax & enjoy sex. There is something sexy about every woman, play it up! Remember that your partner is not nearly as obsessed with your “flaws” as you are and just lay back and enjoy the ride. I used to forego cunnilingus fearing that my kitty cat was not pretty…newsflash…pussies are not inherently pretty & guys love it anyway. Now I just spread and enjoy. Maybe you have a great ass or big boobs…whatever your good features are, play it up & play with them while you’re being intimate. Talk to your partner, ask if he likes what you are doing, if he likes your great ass, ask what you can do, technique wise, to enhance things for him and the mere fact that you want to pleasure him will turn him on as much as you need him to be. My man loves to tittyfuck me so i show enthusiasm and tease him by letting just the tip of his cock into my mouth while he does this and he goes wild! Then i ask him if he likes my big tits and the answer is inevitably yes. My advice is to relax, remind yourself of your special sensual qualities, play them to your advantage and ride that horse home.
Awesome answer girl!!
HI SEAN
PLease i will like to have sometips on how to drive him in bed.
Hi Sylvia,
Have you checked out the newsletter?
Sean
Hi i find your tips helpful but have you got anything more exotic for me and my partner to try
Try the sex bucket list, there is quite a lot there.
The thing is, my man and I are very much sexually active but he doesn’t want to do foreplay on me and always has a stupid reason or excuse for not wanting to do it so Sean I’d like you to advice me on how I should go about on handling this situation beacause it is slowly driving me insane and it’s even making me think that he doesn’t love me enough to that little thing on me or maybe he could be cheating and be doing it on somebody else. I love him to bits and I don’t want this to drift us apart…
PLEASE HELP!!!
Sounds like you should just talk to him and explain everything in a non-judgemental, non-confrontational way. Explain what you need and ask him what he needs.
Really love reading ur articles, keep it up dearie. Please would like to seek advice on best ways &methods to control hips cos am really curvy &naturally endowed with hips &buttocks
hi sean,
Lately I’ve been feeling like my fiancé is completely uninterested in
having sex with me.
when we first started dating we had really amazing sex almost every night
for the first few months and then it just stopped one day and he was no
longer interested in my.
I thought that things might change after we got engage but things got
worse. He’ll take hi phone with him every time he leaves the room and when
he goes to shower he always sees to have a phone call to make right before.
I know that he masturbates every time he goes to shower and I don’t know if
hes talking to another woman or just watching porn.
The few times that we have had sex in the past 5-7 months he only lasts 1-5
minutes and then leaves the room. every time I try to talk to him about it
he gets upset changes the subject and we end up getting into a fight about
something else.
It’s not just the sex, he has been much less romantic and has made rude or
mean comments on how I look. I wish I could say that maybe it is me, But
I’ve lost weight since we’ve been engaged and I put an effort into looking
nice for him but he seems unresponsive no matter what I do.
I don’t know how to get back what we once had and I feel as if I have made
a huge effort to talk to him about it already, but if things don’t change
than I wont be able to go through with the wedding.
I could really use some advice, thanks.
Hi Julia,
Sounds like you’re going through a pretty tough situation and can’t imagine what you’re feeling right now. I’d love to give you the perfect piece of advice to fix this for you, but unfortunately I just don’t know enough about your situation. The one thing I can tell you is that talking to your man about it is going to help.
For your particular situation, sex isn’t the answer. You allow this man to treat you the way he does. This says a lot about your self esteem. If you don’t respect yourself enough to expect to be treated like the treasure you are, how in the world do you expect a man to respect you? It’s about dignity. Here is a secret I learned from author Sherry Argov: Men do not respond to whining and nagging, they respond to lack of contact. You can walk away from him with dignity. You can give him back his engagement ring and decide that you aren’t going to let yourself be treated like a doormat anymore. You don’t owe him anything. Nothing.
Sean,
I love my husband but I have a problem. I don’t cum when we have sex. Its not that it doesn’t feel good, or that he doesn’t try, but I just cant. And I want to so bad, I want he to know that he’s amazing. What do I do? I can by myself, but not with him. I’ve tried talking to him but he get offended and feels like I’m blaming him. I’ve been sexually active since I was 16, and I’m 23 and I’ve NEVER cum! Whats wrong with me?!
Hi Savannah,
If you can cum on your own already, then try to get your man to imitate what you do to make yourself cum. Then once he can do that, cumming during sex is going to be far easier.
Sean
I had this problem, but when I stopped touching myself and stopped watching any porn, I came for the first time in my life while just having sex. I always loved sex with my husband but now I feel so much more connected to my husband now,
Hey, I am for a moment in a long distance relationship with me boyfriend and i really want to talk dirty with him since u cant do any of the others. He usually joins in but these past couple days he constantly says that he’s not feeling it. Should i try something else or should i just stop. I dont want the location between us in where he’s working affect our relationship though. I still want to be with him.
Hey Sean,
My boyfriend doesnt seem like he’s the same these past couple days. We used to have a perfect sex life but now he constantly says that he’s not feeling it. I have talked to him about it but he says that there’s nothing wrong about it. I miss our sex like and i feel all needy. What should i do to get our sex life back to normal. He’s going to a bysuness trip in a couple days and i still want a really good sex life. What do i do to keep our sex life on?
Hi Sarah,
Sounds like a situation that is hard for me to solve. Ultimately, you know your relationship better than I do. So, from my point of view it could literally be anything. One reason could due to a new medication he’s taking…if that’s the case, he should talk to his doctor.
Sean
Sometimes men go through that phase, some men, not all men. Tease him, play with him during lunch or dinner, touch your legs seductively when your watching TV make sure you are wearing a cute nightie, rub up against him wear a new perfume scent. When he kisses goodnight, kiss him and bite his lower lip lightly. Be sensual when you talk to him be seductive with your voice but don’t initiate the seducing in the bedroom, let him come to you and he will. It’s all about your senses besides visual there’s touch, feel, smell and hear. Learn to feel sexy, it’s fun!
Hi Sean,
Back in November I caught my husband masterbating to porn one morning before we had to go to work…. when I confronted him he said he’s been doing it for a few weeks and of course I began to feel betrayed and cheated on!! And yes, there were trust issues I never had before and I began thinking he’s fantasizing of another woman. After a week or so of silence treatment then a good fight, he has walked away from the computer and our sex life is wonderful but I still find him masterbating in the mornings before work!! I don’t understand why he does this because we have sex 3/4 times a week. We have been together for 24 years but have been married for16 years. I have fought within myself to say something to him but have decided not to. can you help me please to understand ?
Hi Lisa, Watching porn from time to time is pretty normal for guys. Doing it compulsively is not. My advice is to talk to him in a non-judgemental, non-confrontational way to figure out if there is perhaps something you could both be doing together instead.
Hi Lisa , my bf wants to watch me get a sensual nude massage from a well hung male escort and with the intention of him giving eating me out and full penetration . I’m horrified what should I do to say no ?.
Just say no. If he can’t respect that, then perhaps there is a problem in your relationship
Hi Sean, so my boyfriend and I have good sex, but he never wants to change it up with new positions, or anything like that. I’m in a wheelchair, so it’s hard for me to initiate the moves. I feel like sex could be even more amazing between us, I’ve tried telling him what I want, and what I’d like to do to him, etc..but I’m always left feeling just a bit unsatisfied. I know I have limitations, but feel like if he put in a little more effort, it would be bomb every time!
Then talk to him!
Any tips for a first timer at a 3 men and a lady. I’m excited but don’t want to disappoint my man. Not his 1st time. We have chatted heaps. I just want to know some nitty gritty. 🙂
Hi Sean
I’ve tried everything but my husband not interested in sex at all. It’s always me initiating and he keeps his eyes shut. He never reciprocates the countless BJs I give him and he says they’re great. I’m in shape, buy lingerie, kinky costumes, send him dirty pics and messages. What can I do?
Sounds like you need to talk to him about your wants, needs and desires. You may also want to check out our guide to sexual communication.
Hi Sean,
I love having sex with my husband however he gets a little to rough when using his fingers on my clitoris. I have tried talking to him about it and even asking him to be gentle all he says is he is being gentle. I have tried saying it is a very sensitive area and I try showing him but he just continues doing everything the same way. He has even left me sore to the point of feeling bursied for days not fun…what else can I do.
You need to sit him down and explain this. Ask him if he wants a toothy blow job and he should understand.
So I have a problem. It seems like I want my boyfriend more than he wants me. He rarely is ever just randomly hard for me and more often than not, I’m the one who has to initiate the sex. Not that I mind but I’d like for him to want me as much as I want him. Very rarely does he want me to give him a blowjob even though I think he enjoys when I do. He has only ever gone down on me once and foreplay is not on his agenda. I’m not sure what to do… my self confidence is lacking as it is and this is just making it worse.
Sounds like you should talk. This guide on Sexual Communication should help.
Love everything about bad girls bible
Dirty talk. My husband loves it when I start screaming fuck me fuck my pussy. Drives him nuts.