This updated guide will show you that you can still have a fantastic sex life if you or your man has a small penis and provides techniques that will help you get the most out of small penis sex! To start, I’m going to cover some issues about small penises, then I’ll get to the positions and techniques (oral, squirting & more!). Please don’t skip the first part, you’re going to learn a lot!
Firstly, Do You Really Have a Small Penis?
Sometimes guys feel insecure about the size of their penis when it’s actually pretty average. Averages vary across the globe. According to a meta-analysis of 21 penis size studies, where 13,719 men had their penises measured, “the average length of an erect penis is between 5.1 and 5.5 inches (12.95-13.97 cm) [1].” Although, the researchers noted that “after taking volunteer bias into account, it is probably toward the lower end of this range [1].”
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Another study found that the range of erect penis length for most men is 5-6.5 inches [2] or 5-6 inches [3 p 4]. A review of existing studies of over 15,000 men found that the average penis length was much closer to the lower end of that range at 5.17, with a girth of 4.59 inches [4].
Note: We recently ran a study with 1,387 women participating where we discovered how small is too small for women. The results were pretty surprising and you may want to check it out if you are worried that you are not big enough.
Yet many men still feel like their penises are too small. Why is this? What is considered a small penis has definitely been influenced by porn. Because many of us see most penises in porn, which features penises that are especially long and thick and are not at all representative of the average.
A study published by researchers in CSULA and UCLA found that while 85 percent of women are satisfied with the size of their man’s penis, only 55% of men were satisfied with their penis size and 45% wanted to be larger [5]. This phenomenon is common enough that some people describe “small penis syndrome [6 p 202],” in which a man experiences anxiety about his penis being smaller than average.
While you don’t have to run out and demand to see others’ penises, remember that what you see on the screen is there because it looks good and fits the mold and that penises come in a wider variety overall.
When talking about penis size, there are two things to consider: length and girth. Length sounds obvious but it’s a bit more complicated than people realize. The penis extends beneath the skin where it’s surrounded by a fatty pad. This is why guys who lose weight seem to gain penis length.
There’s even a saying that for every thirty pounds a man loses, he’ll gain an inch in penis length.
Girth refers to the thickness, which can be measured around (circumference) or as a cross-section (diameter). These things are often proportionate. A micropenis is short and thin, but a penis can be long and thin or short and wide. For some women, a short penis isn’t an issue as long as it’s thick enough.
What About Micropenis?
Some men have an especially tiny penis known as a micropenis. While a small penis may just be slightly smaller than average, a penis is considered a micropenis if it is 2.5 standard deviations less than the average when age is taken into consideration [8].
“2.5 standard deviations” may sound like a mumbo-jumbo science term, so let’s break down exactly what it means.
Take a study from BJU International, for example, which reported that the average erect penis was 5.17 inches in length with a standard deviation of .65 inches [4]. 2.5 standard deviations of .65 inches just means that you multiply 2.5 by .65 inches which gives you 1.625 inches.
5.17 inches – 1.625 inches gives you 3.545 inches. So in this study, they concluded that a micropenis is 3.545 inches or shorter.
While some people widely label any penis under 3 inches long as a micropenis, a larger penis may count as a micropenis if the culture’s average is longer than the global average.
To be clear, there still isn’t uniform agreement on exactly what constitutes a micropenis. According to another study, the majority of men with a micropenis fall within 2 standard deviations of the average [9].
While a small penis might be due to normal variation, a micropenis can result from hormone issues during development [10]. This may be due to gene mutations [13] or other causes.
Read More: 14 Answers to Your Big Questions About A Micropenis
Can You Make a Small Penis Larger?
The Internet is full of get-big-quick schemes that might seem alluring to a guy who has a small penis and feels insecure about it, especially if women have made a big deal out of it in the past.
The truth is, there’s no FDA-approved product to make your penis larger.
While you may be able to pay someone to perform a surgery or buy supplements or black-market products that may increase the size of a small penis, you shouldn’t take anything without approval from your doctor — even a supplement. These things may interact negatively with existing medications or could even cause harm on their own. This is especially true if you inject anything into your penis to make it bigger.
Some devices exist that can help you temporarily increase the size of your penis or help make your erection stronger, which can make it appear or feel larger than it is. You’ll learn more about these in the “Tools” section below!
Also, consider losing weight if you’re overweight. Carrying extra weight means the fatty pad that surrounds your penis is bigger and can obscure some of your penis that would be revealed were you slimmer. These 12 positions are great for fat couples.
Research also shows that being overweight tends to negatively interfere with sexual desire and sexual performance and even cause a lack of sexual activity enjoyment [16].
Read More: An Analysis of 28 Scientific Studies on Making Your Penis Bigger
How to Tell a Woman About Your Small Penis
If there’s one thing a guy with a small or micropenis worries about, it’s when to tell a new partner. Should he warn her ahead of time so she can bow out? Should he just let her realize the first time they fool around? Maybe it’ll be fine if they develop feelings first.
Take a look at women’s’ thoughts on the subject, and you’ll see most of them agree: the sooner a guy tells her, the better.
This doesn’t mean that telling a woman you’re smaller than average guarantees she’ll break up with you or you won’t have sex.
In fact, some women suffering from a condition known as vaginismus that makes their vaginas uncomfortably tight will probably appreciate it
It just means she won’t be surprised by the fact. This surprise can kill arousal in the heat of the moment.
Yes, some women will find a small penis a dealbreaker, but it won’t be for others.
Don’t just take it from us, here’s what one female Redditor had to say.
I dated a dude for 2 years that was about 2″. He was incredibly insecure about it at first until I made it clear that he was great at getting me off in other ways. Plus, it made BJ’s really easy for me. I think we had actual PIV sex twice in those two years, and I still consider it one of the best relationships I’ve been in.
Consider the women who prefer a larger penis as simply noncompatible sexually. There are many ways people might not be sexually compatible. For example, some people require kinky sex to get off, while others want nothing to do with it. Part of cultivating a happy and healthy sex life is finding someone who either shares the same desires or who will compromise with you, so you both get what you want.
People often overlook sexual compatibility when they’re in love, but it’s important. It’s better to get these things out of the way rather than to waste your time and hers if it doesn’t work out in the end. Too often, people get into relationships with and even marry people who are not sexually compatible. Years or decades down the road they find themselves resentful and walking away, sometimes splitting up a family, because they can no longer take it.
So if a woman doesn’t want to be with you because of your penis or for any reason, really, consider it a bullet dodged.
But to the real question, how do you say it? Try to do it before sex comes up. This is one of those topics where saying it over the text or phone is probably okay. You can try something like:
Babe, I really like you and think there’s potential for this to go someplace. Before we go any further, I think you should know that my penis is smaller than normal, and this has been an issue in the past.
You can change things up to be more specific to your situation. If you’re not romantically involved, you might focus on how much you’re attracted to her but let her know about your smaller-than-average stature. Some guys prefer to let their partners know that they’re excellent lovers in a variety of ways, which brings us to our next point.
A Good Lover Doesn’t Need a Large Penis
A lot of guys worry that having a small dick means they can’t please their partners. The truth is, most guys are too penis-focused when it comes to sex. There’s something everyone should know:
Sex doesn’t have to be about the size or ability of your penis!
This is actually a good thing because you can spend less time thinking about size, erection, and ejaculating the way you’re “supposed to.” Instead, you can enjoy sex, explore with your partner, and break out of those restrictive sexual scripts (sexual scripts are the ideas about what sex is supposed to look like).
According to one study 36.6% of women require stimulation to orgasm [17]. Since penetration only stimulates the clitoris if it’s close to the vaginal opening or if you use a position such as the Coital Alignment Technique (learn more about CAT here), even a large penis may not get her off. Researchers believe this is why women orgasm less consistently from penetrative sex than men [18].
Take it from one female Redditor who said:
I actually have better orgasms when I’m not having intercourse tbh…and when I do have orgasms during sex it’s mostly from clitoral stimulation and has nothing to do with his dick.
Instead, you can use your hands, tongue, and sex toys to do the trick. Men who focus on those activities will already become better and less selfish lovers in their partner’s eyes. Before it even comes to penetration, she may have had an orgasm or multiple (more about multiple orgasms).
Here is an in-depth post on clitoral stimulation that will teach you how to have sex with a small penis better while stimulating her clit.
Then, penetrative sex is like the cherry on top! Or you might have sex in ways without penetration if it’s too difficult to have sex with a small penis.
One Reddit user describes it with enthusiasm:
The key is to own it. If you look insecure, or ask for validation, or draw attention to it, you’re dead. If you start off with conversation, then flirting, kissing, a bit of groping, escalate as you get to a bed, feel her all over, and then get going with the fingers and tongue on her breasts and clit to get her fire roaring before you come up and put it in her, not forgetting to continue touching her spots while you’re fucking her, she’ll be too busy buzzing around in heaven to ever notice, and afterwards, she’ll be too damn bonked out of her brain to care.
Of course, some women require penetration to orgasm, or simply enjoy penetration. Orgasm isn’t the only measure of pleasure, after all. For those instances, you might use tools such as a penis sleeve or your fingers to give her what she needs (see below for more suggestions). You can also employ an insertable vibrator or dildo in her size preference to make her happy. When she’s happy, she’ll be more willing to make you happy.
Remember that even a smaller penis may be able to stimulate her G-spot, which is situated just less than 2 inches inside her vagina rather than closer to the cervix at the back. According to study, it’s 4.5cm or 1.77 inches deep inside her [19].
Check out this guide with images to help find the G-spot. When you feel an area that is rougher than the rest, eureka! You’ve found it.
Once you get away from the idea that sex is all about your penis or even penetration, you’ll see how easy it is to have good sex with a small penis. But really, this advice improves any sex. After all, a guy with a large penis might think that’s enough and have zero skill. You’ll definitely beat him out if you develop those skills.
There is a caveat, however.
A Bad Attitude Might Be a Dealbreaker Even If Your Penis Isn’t
What do we mean? Being super insecure about your penis size can lead to negative behaviors such as constantly wanting reassurance or overcompensating in ways that are arrogant or obnoxious. She might be able to get over the size of your penis and have great small penis sex… but can you?
Sometimes it’s not the size of your dick but how you feel about it that can ruin a potentially good thing. Don’t get us wrong; it’s completely understandable if you feel some insecurities. But if you’re so wrapped up in them that it affects your masculinity and manhood, you might consider talking to a professional to work through them.
By now it should be obvious that being a good partner/lover and an awesome man doesn’t tie into your penis size directly, but it may take a little more work than reading this article to accept that. Good luck!
What to Do if Your Partner Has a Small Penis
So your partner has a small penis, what do you do?
Be Kind
Whatever you do, be kind and compassionate. Size may be a deal-breaker for you, or it may be a surprise the first time you’re going to have sex. Sometimes our faces can betray our feelings even when we’re trying to be nice. Remember that his hard penis might be much larger than his soft one if he’s a ‘grower’ and not a ‘shower.’
Sometimes a partner doesn’t know how or when to let you know he has a small dick. Doing so takes a lot of courage. You may be the first partner he’s opened up to, or other women may have made fun of him in the past.
Women can do hurtful things such as tell their friends about their partner or ex’s tiny penis, share photos, or bring it up in fights. All you need to do is look at the various Reddit threads where guys remember the cruel things that have been said and done to them. One man stated how “finding someone who I love and who loves me back and having to “break the news” is [his] biggest fear.” You don’t want to contribute to that even if it’s not going to work out.
Break It Off Gently and Quickly If You Must
If you know that a small penis or a micropenis is a deal-breaker, it’s best to let him know that it won’t work out as soon as possible. Don’t drag it on. Unfortunately, if you realize this the first time you had sex, and you stop seeing him shortly after, he’ll probably think it’s because of his penis. Sometimes there’s no getting around that. However, you can be compassionate and kind when you know you’re just not a good fit.
There’s no way he can permanently change his penis size, and his size it due to genetic factors that are out of his control. Making him feel bad about that is a pretty heartless thing to do.
Look On the Bright Side
On the other hand, a small penis might not be a big obstacle or if you prefer shallow penetration (big penises sex hurts some women) or if your guy is an attentive lover that uses all the tools at his disposal, and it may be something you choose to work around if you have feelings for this guy.
Encourage experimentation with sex positions for a small penis and toys, and keep the lines of communication open and clear to ensure a satisfying sex life. Remember that people of all different bodies and abilities can enjoy sex.
Related: Use Sexual Communication for Complete Sexual Fulfillment
It may be difficult to talk about these issues. Try not to blame him (it’s not his fault) and focus on the fact that some activities or positions are less than ideal than your bodies. Have a few suggestions on hand to try (you can also simply direct him into a new position during sex).
The truth is that size does matter to women in some ways. The wrong perception can halt a relationship before it even starts. But size doesn’t always matter in the way some people imagine it will!
Guys with large penises are used to women being impressed, oohing and aahing over the size. Many times, these men think they don’t need to develop any technique because their large penises will be enough, which may or may not be true! But men with small penises often want to make up for their lack of size in other ways. Maybe they are more attentive to a woman’s needs. Perhaps they have developed excellent oral skills.
When a guy has the right mindset about sex, you might find the sex to be so great that the small penis isn’t an issue at all. It might be more exciting to look at a large penis, but once the sex is underway, it might not make much of a difference to you.
Even when his size is less than optimal, learning how to have sex with a small penis rather than using the same old tips can make a world of difference.
Don’t Lie
Remember that your guy may want reassurance. While it’s not up to you to stroke his ego, you can remind him of the things you enjoy about your sex life and relationship. This should come especially easy if you have a strong romantic connection. Avoid saying things about his penis being big because you both know it’s not the truth, and that’s hurtful, even if you don’t mean it to be.
Be Careful with Toys
Finally, the topic of sex toys. If your guy has suggested them, it’s a safe bet you can break yours out or suggest shopping together. However, some guys can be intimidated by toys even if they don’t have a small penis. The way you introduce toys matters. Try one of these to introduce toys:
- “Do you want to see me come?”
- “It would be so hot if you use this one on me.”
Remember that toys can make him feel good, too.
Sex Positions For A Small Penis
Here are the best positions for a small penis, some of which stimulate the G-spot area or to make his penis feel bigger.
Thigh Tide
Many people agree that girl-on-top positions are the best sex positions for a small penis because the woman can really sink onto the man. You can also adapt it by placing a pillow beneath his hips if you help. Thigh Tide is especially good because while the woman faces away from the man, his leg is bent at the knee and she can grind against it for clitoral stimulation. Like other woman-on-top positions, this one lets her set the pace.
Cowgirl
In this classic woman-in-top position, small penis sex is easier because gravity pulls the fat pad that surrounds the penis down to reveal more of the shaft. Either partner can stimulate her clitoris and there may be room for a vibrator depending on your bodies.
Try this trick: the man places his hand face down on his lower abs with his fingers spread in Spock’s Vulcan salute with two fingers resting on either side of his penis. The woman can grind against her knuckles as she rides him.
Turtle Position
Get down on your hands and knees, put your butt in the air and keep your back arched and your thighs together. Pull your chest down towards your thighs. This variation of Doggy Style makes it easy for your man to penetrate you deeply. You can also learn 10 other Doggy Style positions here.
Anvil Position
The Anvil position works great because it shortens the vaginal canal, so penetration feels much deeper. Also, by keeping your legs close together or even crossing your ankles helps to increase the friction and feeling of tightness. Just make sure you are flexible and strong enough before attempting this position. You can learn 24 other sex positions where you are lying on your back here.
Sandwich Position
If you are very flexible, then you should try out the Sandwich position. As you can see in the demonstration above, you need to bend your legs and bring them back to your side. To help you do this, try placing your hands on your knees and pull them back and down.
There are over 110 more sex positions you can try.
What About Anal Sex?
If you’ve never had anal sex before, having it with a guy with a small penis might be the ideal way to begin. You won’t be intimidated, and your man should have a good time.
Check out the in-depth Anal Sex Guide with tips for having satisfying and pain-free anal sex. Of course, if you are looking for some good anal sex positions to try with your man, then you will find 19 different positions here.
Other Tools to Make Small Penis Sex Work
Using tools to make sex is smart no matter what you’re working with. Many men feel an immense amount of pressure to have a penis that looks right, can become erect at a moment’s notice, and remains hard as long as he wants, and will have no trouble ejaculating, but also doesn’t ejaculate too quickly.
Sometimes things don’t work that way. But there are so many tools at your disposal. From your hands and tongue to sex toys, you can rely on those tools to have good sex and take some of the pressure of your penis!
We’ve already mentioned using a pillow, but it’s worth mentioning again. Placing a pillow underneath the partner on the bottom’s hips raises them and brings the two of you closer together. If your regular pillows fall flat, try a memory foam pillow that will keep its shape. Companies such as Liberator make them, especially for sex.
A vacuum pump is a device that can be used before sex to temporarily increase the size of a penis with suction. Cock rings are then worn at the base of the penis during sex to prevent blood from leaving the erection, which can give the impression of a larger penis. Finally, a penis sleeve is made from a soft material that you wear on your cock during sex. Sleeves can add girth and length and may also be textured.
Don’t forget about fingers! If you’ve got a smaller penis, your partner will be able to tell if you’re using your finger, instead. That’s not always a bad thing, but you don’t want to be deceptive. However, you can always insert a finger or two along with your penis depending on what’s comfortable.
Eat Pussy Like A God & More
Of course, there’s more to satisfying your female partner than simply using the correct sex position. You’ll should check out our in-depth, illustrated guides on how to blow her mind without actually have intercourse:
Start by learning how to eat pussy like a god, then…
Learn how to make your girl squirt as she orgasms, and finally…
Discover the secret to fingering your girl so she has the most powerful orgasms of her life.
Don’t Forget About Safer Sex
Many people use condoms to prevent pregnancy and the transmission of STIs. Condoms work best when properly fitted. If you have a micropenis or a tiny dick, standard condoms might be a bit large. This can cause them to slip off [20].
Many companies make condoms for smaller penises, however, so you can still have safe sex. Look for condoms labeled “snug” or “slim” fit.
Finally, consider the female/internal condom. A woman inserts one end of this condom into her vagina where it will sit near her cervix. The other end hangs out slightly. This condom protects against pregnancy and STIs and doesn’t depend on her partner’s size.
Having sex with a guy with a small penis can be just as good as sex with an average-sized or well-endowed guy — if you both have the right mindset and use techniques and sex positions for a small penis that we’ve outlined, you can achieve maximum pleasure. You might find that as long as you have a satisfying sexual relationship, the size really doesn’t matter.
Resources
Reddit is actually a great resource for men with small penises as well as their partners. There’s an entire subreddit for small penis problems. You can also check out these threads:
- Ladies of reddit, how small was the smallest erect penis you have encountered and how did it go?
- New boyfriend has a micropenis, need some advice
- Men with small penises, how is your sex life?
- We surveyed our readers to learn if 6 inches is enough to satisfy a woman.
If you are looking for other ways to satisfy your girl, then you may want to check out the guide on eating pussy, learn how to make her squirt with your hands, along with fingering her.
Frequently Asked Questions
FAQ #1 – Is the reason he hasn’t initiated sex because he has a small dick?
Sometimes men who worry about their small penises may put off sex in a new relationship because they’re worried about how a partner will respond. If your guy has given you other hints to indicate his penis is on the smaller side, this could be why you haven’t had sex yet. He may be waiting until the two of you are closer or can be sure he can trust you. However, there are other reasons why someone might put off sex, such as low libido, inability to perform, or wanting to be in love first.
FAQ #2 – Should I tell him his penis is big if it’s really small?
No!
He knows his penis is small. If you tell him otherwise, he’ll think you’re a liar or worse, that you feel sorry for him. Trust is important to a relationship.
Still, some guys who are insecure about their small penises may ask for encouragement. Focus on what you do you like, such as his sexual skill or generosity or the positive aspects of your relationship. Remind him that there’s more to him than just his penis and that there’s a reason why you chose him over anyone else! Be kind but be honest.
FAQ #3 – Will anyone ever want to have sex with me if I have a small penis? Do I have a chance at being in a relationship?
You’re not alone if you’re worried about your small dick dooming your chances at satisfying sex or a loving relationship. However, many men with small penises find sexual and romantic partners. Remember that some women won’t want to be with you, but that preference means you’re not sexually compatible.
But keep in mind that some women aren’t attracted to bald men, short men, very tall men, fat men, skinny men, old men or young men. Everyone has their own preferences and that’s fine.
In any case, studies have shown that women might not care as much as you think…
According to a study on penis size and orgasm, for women with a history orgasm during penetrative sex about 34 percent prefer longer-than-average penises. Importantly, it found that 60 percent said the size didn’t matter when it came to orgasm. Most interestingly, 6.3% reported that they are less likely to have orgasms with longer penises [21].
The fear that no woman will want them prevents some men from entering the dating scene, engaging with women and, occasionally, even picking up when a woman is flirting with them. Having a small penis can make some men feel insecure. However, a poor attitude is often a bigger problem than the size of the penis.
FAQ #4 – How do I tell a woman I’ve been seeing about my small penis?
While you might be waiting for the perfect moment to spill the beans, no moment is perfect. In fact, getting the issue out of the way sooner rather than later can help you weed out people who are not sexually compatible. If you browse the Internet, women will say they don’t want to be surprised by a smaller penis. They would rather know what to expect, which allows them to prepare or to leave the situation if they don’t want to be with a partner with a small penis.
FAQ #5 – What can I do to make my small penis bigger?
There are plenty of websites that describe stretching techniques such as jelqing, which purport to make your penis larger. You can also buy any number of supplements, usually intended to increase blood flow to make your erections seem larger, online. Ads also claim traction devices can help, and some doctors may suggest surgery.
Your penis may look bigger if you’re overweight and slim down. Furthermore, there are things you can consider during sex to make your penis seem or feel bigger:
- Cock rings prevent blood from leaving your penis for a strong erection. Learn more about cock rings.
- Penis sleeves can add length and girth.
Some men also use penis pumps, which rely on suction, to temporarily increase the size of their penis. Again, some people are fans, but these devices aren’t proven to make your penis bigger. Plus, there’s a risk of injury when you use it.
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BRENDA says
My new partner has a small penis these tips will help when we get intimate. Thank you.
Sean Jameson says
Hi Brenda, Check out the sex positions section and do some experimentation. There are tons of different positions that will help make him penetrate you deeper and positions where he will feel bigger inside you.
joann says
Sorry, but that isn’t true. If the bigger man has technique he will be better than a small one with technique.
Sun says
You’re an idiot, Joann. The author didn’t say anything along those lines. S/He brought up hypotheticals.
No need to talk like you know everything, we already know you’re a slut.
Nena says
That’s too funny
Bill says
Way to go, Sun. Hilarious!
Sage says
True
Lilly says
This is utterly depressing.
I have to say though, the common advice to be honest & not tell the guy that he is big yet avoid telling him that its small is very contradictory. I told my boyfriend, with tact & he handled it pretty well (since he’s the 2nd guy I’ve slept with, my first partner was significantly larger & naturally, our sexual chemistry- well to me was good.) I’m not sexually attracted to my boyfriend at all. I really like him as a person & more importantly, he adores me. (When you’ve been in a relationship where your worth had been compromised, it’s only natural to seek a good man, not just someone who can make you laugh and reach peak orgasms yet treats you likes doormat)
Not really sure what to do….& it sucks that I’m a gym rat- really curvy but at 50%+ muscle compared to a guy that doesn’t work out at all & I can’t tell him to pick up weights or something…that would be so rude & not right….I don’t want him to be insecure about his body because of me….but I can’t lie….all together, sex right now…is such an unappealing activity & ive gotten to the point where it’s so technical- I’m constantly trying to figure out postions that dot not involve my butt being in his face or, where I might as well be a sex doll because I can’t feel anything.
Hope says
Girlie don’t know how you do it, it is not fair that your bringing such a great package, a healthy fit body to him while he doesn’t work out at all! I suggest you encourage him!! Say it /ask nicely if he wants to accompany you to the gym! Or if he can help you eat healthy by him eating healthy with you to keep you accountable! Be indirect as well as direct you know ! I am a gym rat also and can’t date anyone who is not about that health and fitness lifestyle! Good luck Hun!
Deann says
I’m going though the same thing with not being sexually attracted to my new boyfriend. It would so hard with him being overweight which we both are but I’m pretty curvy and still sexy and he is such a large man and can only do one position. I’m bored out of mind and decided that tonight I will let him know that. I have been trying to motivate him to lose weight but I know he is eating and drinking things he shouldn’t behind my back. I hope my frustrations with him doesn’t get the best of me and my words will come out right when we have this conversation because he is truly a wonderful man but we have NO chemistry whatsoever.
Ben says
You are using him because his kindmess and attention makes you feel better about yourself emotionally. Its pretty uncool…? Its just as bad as if he was saying and doing all those nice things just so he can get laid and really had no other intetest in you. Its a sad situation. .
Blake says
Wow Lilly, thats brutally honest and i think you addressed, and answered your own questions. If you indeed are not sexually attracted to your man in anyway then you need to get out of the relationship before you hurt him anymore that you possibly already have done. If you werent attracted to him when you got together, but liked him because he had a great personality your sexual attraction should have developed with him as your relationship grew. Sounds to me like you guys were friends before you got together and now you dont want to break up because your afraid to hurt him. Sounds like he is lacking endowment from what your saying. You sound disgusted at the thought of having sex with him, when it should be an exciting enticing thought. You need to leave him. Leave him but leave him with his dignity. get out of the relationship
jean says
i love to suck cock. icould do it all. knight
Joe says
I have a small penis, about 4.5 inches erect max! Spooning doesn’t seem to work though! It’s too short to be honest! Don’t you think so?
Sean Jameson says
That’s ok, there are plenty more positions to try.
Burguni California says
My new guy comes up short, literally. Riding doesn’t work as it constantly slips out at any movement. Doggy style is the only position that it feels like I can get there, but of course he is done before I even start. He is not even giving me head to distract from his short comings. No foreplay. I, also don’t wanna hurt his feelings as I do like him, but how can I deprive myself of satisfaction?
Rai says
Honestly, it sounds like he doesn’t care if you’re pleased at all. My guy is pretty tiny. However, he eats me like none other. I had never been able to even kind of get close to orgasming with someone going down on me, but he gets me off pretty constantly just by doing it. Needless to say, its just penetration that is a little lackluster.
If you’re wanting to add more foreplay, just do it. Guide his hand if telling him is awkward. Or, if you’re feeling adventurous, say something like, “You can’t fuck me until you’ve eaten my pussy.” How anyone can settle for “meh” sex is beyond me. You deserve to be pleasured. You deserve someone that sparks that little part of your mind. Don’t be afraid to ask for more, because if he can’t or, god forbid, won’t, trust in that there is a guy with a similar personality and a bigger dick out there who would give you more.
Paris says
If he not giving you no head you better make him get on his face and just take control he will get some act right then
ben joe says
I have the small size about 5inch tall and 5inch circumference, But I don’t know why my girl friend keep on complain that I haven’t given her sexual satisfaction. We have been making love for 4 months now. She keep on complaining, What should I do
Sean Jameson says
Sounds like you should talk to her to figure out what she needs so that she can feel sexually satisfied.
Jay says
If her part is tight, then all you can do is work on the clitoris.. but if shes not then u can do cervical stimulation.. just fix two fingers in, lay one on the g-spot and use the next one to just play around her cervix… they dont care… as long as they reach topx
Paris says
If she love you she will accept that you have that size just give ha head be selfish with it she will want it than don’t give it to her when she wants it
Chance says
I have a small penis, 5.5″ long and 4.75″ in girth and my girl just keeps saying it’s fine, but the only way I can make her cum is by oral, but she does sy I’m by far the best at oral than she has ever had. she doesnt seem to care if we hAve sex or not and if I want it it’s just like ok hit it. she used to talk about how she was multi orgasmic but not with me. She just turned 50 and I’m 46, she dated a 27yr old for 1.5 yrs and a 30 yr old for 2 yrs before me. When I ask why she is with me, she says I’m good to her. I don’t want to be with someone who is settling for someone who treats them good. I want someone who is into me totally. She swears she is, but it doesn’t feel like it and I am more self-conscious about my penis than i have ever been. I asked her what average is and she basically said about an inch longer and a little wider. I read a lot, too much actually about this and I know my girth is quite a bit smaller than what women want. She also don’t ever want to talk about it and I think she wouldn’t mind if my size wasn’t truly a problem. Am I being over self-conscious or what? Please let me know what yall think. It’s driving me crazy.
Jack says
5.5″ inches is the statistical average and not “small”. It sounds like your relationship has a lot more problems than your penis size.
Jobert says
I have a very small penis. About 4″ in length and about 2 inches in diameter.
I had a girlfriend about 10 years ago and our sex life was ok. She however was very in experienced. I’m in my early thirties now and have had very few sexual encounters, and when I do I can’t even get erect because of my anxiety.
I don’t really know how to get over it, and am in constant fear of even going on a date. i live in a small city so I can easily run into former sexual partners, who generally treat me like a leper.
Don’t really know what to do.
Milton says
The issue is not with your penis but in your head. Being self conscious about your penis size is not just a turnoff for you but also for any potential lovers. Try mindfulness to relax To be grounded and present to the women you date as opposed to just being in your head..
Kevin Kennedy says
I’ve never had a complaint until I got with her. She’s the love of my life but our sex is so ultra bland & boring. She doesn’t even come on to me, we wouldn’t even have sex if I didn’t pursue her. So I sat her down to ask her what the issue was & she replied that my dick is to skinny. She needs more girth. What do I do? Her comment killed me & my ego. I just wanted to dump her & go back to all my past women but I know that, that wouldn’t be any good. What can I do?
HOPELESS says
Do you have any tips for the women to be able to climax. My boyfriend has a small penis and I feel we have tried everything and nothing seems to get me to climax. It’s almost to the point were sex isn’t enjoyable for me because I rarely(almost never) have an orgasm. We’ve tried some of the different positions still no orgasm for me. It had hurt my sex drive to the point were I don’t care if we have sex at all. Please help.
Sean Jameson says
Try checking out the Orgasm Guide here.
Will says
Hi I’m Will and I have been blessed with a small penis… 2inches limp 5inches errect…I used to be insecure about my size in my teens but I realised I was so self conciens about my penis that i only realised in my early 20 that between the ages of 19 and 23, I was natural experimenting with positions, manual and oral. (I had four relationships in that time and have had 5 partners in that inline) through technique I never had complaints or seen my wife of 7 years now disappointed. I love the hard work? and concentrating on giving her pleasure extends the time of my climax. Lots of ejaculations but climaxing is put on hold. Basically what my point is.., having a small penis has made me a better, more passionate and thorough love… Clvxxxii
Joss says
I met a guy who in time got very (and stil is) attracted to me on all levels (mentaly, emontionally and physically). In short he’s falling for me big time. He’s smart, very manly, emotinally stable, secure, sweet, caring, honest. He’s got a great job, hobbies, he’s a passionate person, active and belives in self development, learning. He has in my mind enormous potential to be an amazing partner. And I do feel a great deal for him, what he does for me, how he is…I could see him as someone I could have an amazing life with.
There is just one “small” thing…(small being the operative word) – him. He is small, as a person (he’s my height, honestly we can almost wear eachothers’ clothes o_O) and down there…I can’t say but it might be around 4-5″ hard, maybe..
He’s soooo not my type – I hate short guys with small hands and small feet. I can’t even wear shoes that are not flats, cause then the height difference becomes obvious and I feel so akward…And his penis…I’m sorry all you guys with small penises – I’m like Samantha Jones: “What can I say, I need a big dick”. I love it, Oraly pleasuring a man is one of my favourites. And that small thing is just not doing it for me. What’s worse, he himself is so not attractive, so not my type, my style, couldn’t be further, so i’m not sexually attracted at all. And that does not make me want to be active in bed (yes, we did move onto ‘sort-of’ relationship thing), I don’t want to kiss him (and that’s a third dealbreaker, horrible kisser), touch him with passion, I just become this receptive thing that just lies there and moan occasionally…
But I adore him, he’s such an amazing guy. There are moments when I feel I could get over all this stuff, we get together and then I catch myself again at the same spot – thinking about someone else, my dream man.
It will never work, will it? :((
Corby says
This is disgusting, you suggest anal sex! That’s not only dirty but an abomination. Only one of these seemed like a good position.
Angel says
I’m older and dating a guy who is a little older than I, we have great chemistry together, he has a small penis and can’t always get hard. I can do oral sex on him and he cums, he is great at oral on me, I cum every time. He has mentioned getting a strap on that he inserts his penis into and use on me, sounds okay to me, he worries far more about intercourse than I do. Don’t get me wrong I enjoy intercourse, I just enjoy the oral much better and can get there faster.
Chris says
Ladies – If you are not happy with your guys because the penis dissatisfaction is a deal-breaker, you are only going to be hurting him in the long run by staying with him.
As one of the posters above said, as men we want to be with someone who really wants to be with us. Someone who is present in the relationship. We want a deep connection, an intimate bonding that is based on mutual respect, love and acceptance of each other. It is just a media-driven stereotype that men are just there for the sex. Many of us want much more than that. We want to be able to express love as well as receive love.
As I have gotten older, a lot of the superficial, perfect-body stuff does not matter so much anymore, because I have realized that the real blessing is finding someone I can deeply connect with. Someone who can be passionate about me and who will love me for who I am as a person. Yes, it is important to be have some physical attraction. But if an otherwise great / right person comes along who does not have everything you might think you want, those who are wise and experienced will not just focus on the flaws, but will see the total person for the gift he or she is. At that point, you learn to work with what they have. None of us is going to be perfect in all ways, it is not possible to be.
If you are not at that place yet where you can accept a person flaws and all, it is best to not get involved with that person if you don’t have the capacity to be content with him or her at this time. Maybe your perspective will change in the future. But for now, that person you are unhappy with really should be with someone who can bring them the kind of respect, devotion, and fulfillment they are seeking. At the end of the day, don’t we all want those things?
wendy says
Wow Chris… That comment was truly amazing… Ive got noth8ng else, just WOW and i bet you have a happy Woman ????
Mary says
I guess if your in love…..look I’m a4’11” Asian woman and a 4 inch penis just don’t cut it. I won’t make excuses or try things to make it work. I find a good guy to take care of it. My partner now an average 7 inches and I don’t have to try to find ways to be satisfied. He takes care of that. Isn’t that what real men do?
Jay says
I am beyond depressed over my small penis and am seeing a therapist who specializes in sacred sexual as a means of finding a way to not be so down on it.
Worst problem is I am having zero sex and hook up sites the women always want to see what you are working with and even if they were into me before, those pictures turn them into “umm, your’re sweet, hey gotta go”.
Yes, love would be ideal and all that but I kinda need to have sex to explore and feel better of myself and also to get the nerves out of the way but have zero options.
I could find someone who will date me and be into a LTR and do the long process of courting and dating and so on but for my mind and body I just kind of need to be having some sex right now to get better at it and get over my hangups.
Very frustrating. Worse still is now many women have zero interest in even looking twice at a short white guy so I have so many strikes against me it is not even funny.
Maybe I wanted to talk to someone, sorry I am rambling. Success breeds confidence so I need to get some action so I can gain that and I have nowhere to look and I would maybe hire prostitute but I see now Craig’s List and Backpage don’t have those ads anymore so I do not know where else you find such women.
Sigh,
As for size, my erection is about as long as my iPhone. So if I lay my iPhone on my erection it’s just about the same length so I am pretty sure that is under 5 which means I do not have enough size to thrust.
With short ones like that do you just leave it in and wiggle? Since to thrust would mean falling out or doing super shallow thrusts which nobody likes.
Tasha says
As a woman I honestly prefer a man with a smaller dick. I think you should try rolling your hips in a circle. I had a guy do that to me and it was probably the quickest time I came.
Tom says
My penis is 5” and not very thick. I can satisfy my wife fairly well. Also great with my tongue and make her have multiple orgasms. It’s all in technique and positions! She loves my size because it doesn’t hurt her!
Delicious says
Wow if you have hip rhythm I’m ok with whatever size you have, to be honest dick isn’t the issue for me, it’s the mental chemistry.Once I fall in love mentally the sex will be just as great no matter how big or how small u are.My kids dad had a nice size penis but didn’t know what to do with it, my only downfall with my man now is riding him, I have to just figure another technique out and we are good to go. I don’t want no huge penis to mess up my vagina, nice and slow stop do a lil fourplay and get back to it and boom he has bust and I’m ok with it,it only takes patience in the bedroom bcuz woman with small breast and a small butt may have a complex as well but our job is to make the person feel big or small that your pleasurable to have with no judgment
Brad says
This is so redpill it’s hilarious, great work. honestly it’s mostly renamed old techniques but if your as clueless as the girl in the video then it’s something to consider, but nothing you can’t find on YouTube on some adult channels.
Leon says
For men who are not well endowed, the solution is simply to get a smaller (petite-sized) woman who you’d be sexually compatible with.
Sean Jameson says
That’s one option that sounds great in theory
Jackwillfred says
So I’m right at average — almost 6″ and don’t know my girth, but it seems a tad thin, except for the head. I don’t know how many girls I’ve been with, but no one has ever made negative comments. And still, I feel insecure even when she’s cumming — thanks internet porn. So my current girl, or should I say my pregnant soon to be trophy wife, is really open trying whatever. 50 sex shop visits later, I decide to get a penis extender sleeve –Perect Fit Fat Boy Sport. It scared her it was so girthy. But with tons of Uber Lube and her submissive nature, I entered, and she came hard and fast as did I. The next day, she hurt, and so we only use it occasionally. Then she got pregnant, which makes sex weird. Spooning positions suck unless the girl is a foot or more shorter than me: I’m 6’3, My fiance is 5’8″. SO, I bought a length and girth extender. I loved it as it gave me more thrust range. She doesn’t like it.
Big dicks are cool — congrats to those who won the lottery. But a dick is just a dick. V-Jays can be big or small, but no one cares. Back doors are tight, and the average couple should be having anal sex these days because its awesome and average fits quite nicely.
Here are some tips that I have not heard that will get a girl off: Clean your house and bathrooms; always have clean sheets. Massage her body and scalp — enjoy yourself. The when you are ready, take control and tell her get in whatever position you want, but always offer for her to get on top before you cum. After sex, immediately drop the controlling thing and truly be a gentleman. Get up and get her some water of some ice cream. Do things for her, say nice things, and be kind. Showing a woman that you are a real man goes further than the length of your pecker.
Ed says
My name is Ed and I have been very unhappy with my sex life. I have been experiencing E.D. ( erectile disfunction ) for several years. And on top of this problem, I’m have a micro penis. So if I’m able to have my penis rug across her vagina, its a miracle.
My loving wife has Serious back pain. And says she is happy with her sex lift. She says she can go without sex. So we have sex once every other month, But never refuses.
Is there anything I can do? Please respond back to me, through my personal email
Thank you
Ed
Ron says
all i learned is size matters and i am doomed thanks i guess
Tracy says
Women not attracted to your man … leave (unless you’re married or you’ve agreed to a non passionate relationship.)
We all need to be with someone that craves us sexually and emotionally. It’s not fair to hang onto someone because they make you feel good about yourself or treats you well. That’s a friend, not a lover.
Rob says
I was born with a tiny micro penis that is always retracted inside my abdomen. While growing up I was constantly made fun of especially in the shower after gym class. Girls dated me in High school but became disinterested in me when they discovered my size. I was so depressed and self conscious about this and the whole school knowing about my tiny cock that I considered suicide. A few years later I got married to a woman that accepted all of me. I became a self acclaimed expert at giving her oral sex and gave her good orgasms. I later introduced her to a lifelike dildo copy of porn star Jeremy
Bilding to her and she had multiple crazy toe curling O’s that probably woke the neighbors up .I realized then that my wife desired deep penetration . I was jealous about this dildo at first but I accepted myself as I was and gained confidence that this was another way to please her. we started buying larger and larger dildos to the current Vixen Creations Gambler and Jeff Stryker models which she is currently addicted to. I. started roleplaying our mutual friends having sex with her. Eventually after time and a few drinks he was in our bedroom giving her a real flesh experience. Watching his big cock pump her and open her up was so much of a turn on to us both. At first I wanted to stop him when I heard her moans,I regretted seeing him inside her but when he came in her it was so hot I couldn’t stop them. I have totally accepted the fact that Although I can never satisfy my wife by penetrating her there are other things we can do to give her what she needs.I know having other men copulating your wife isn’t for everyone but seeing another guys cum in my wife is intoxicating and very addictive and so fun to us.Im actually glad I have a tiny cock now, as we wouldn’t have ever experienced these things.Guys get your girl a dildo! Swallow your pride. No matter how big you are you won’t last long enough to work her g spot or deeper A&I spots to give her mind blowing off the chart orgasms.
Janet says
Mmm but i love small penis
Jacob Odhiambo says
Acertain my boyfriend have small dick and i need it to be bigger so how can you help me
eric says
I never had sex before. And I’m 22 years old. I measured my penis to be 5.5 inches soft and 7.25 inches when hard. I still feel my penis is too small compared to the porn stars I have seen. I get nervous when my pants show my size when the wind blows against it or pants are too tight. I’m scared that my first gf will laugh at my size the first time she will see it.
Aurora says
I sincerely doubt anyone would laugh at that… unless they’re mean girls already deciding to laugh “no matter what “ they see…
You’re more then 2 inches longer then what I consider perfect or even doable. x.x for me going too deep just feels like being stabbed with a freaking spear, not FUN! Total turn off, but yh different girls are different flexible I guess? Most of my friends would think your size is difficultly big tho.
Aurora says
I’m wondering something about Vjays tho! What is tight even? What is that supposed to feel like? Is it supposed to be like a constant really strong pressure for the penis? Is it supposed to be a struggle for the guy to get inside? What is it really??
As a girl, I’ve only been in one relationship, I thought his size was completely perfect 4.2 inch and 4 circumference. But he ended up cheating on me with one of his girl fans, which he then wanted to be his new gf..
To be perfectly honest, I was a freaking amazing gf! Every way possible. So when this happened I couldn’t and still can’t think that there was any other reason than something sexually lacking in me.
Guys can compare their size to any other guys so easily.. but girls… we have no idea?
What if I’m not even normal? This has damaged my self esteem so much I’m terrified to even be with anyone new.
Sex used to be my favourite hobby or even an important as breathing I would say…
It literally feels like I’m suffocating without it.
I have read things like “ if vaginal walls aren’t TIGHTLY gripping one finger then you’re loose!..
I would say I’m more like 2? 🙁 I have petite fingers tho but still…
But at the same time… I doesn’t make sense to me that “normal average” would be one finger!
How do they ever fit a penis then?? Especially when then also say most women prefer average or bigger then average penis sizes?? All the information is so contradictory I’m feel like I’m gonna end up living as a nun forever just to not have to go through possibly disappointing some guy and embarrassing myself. I want real stone cold facts!
Sean Jameson says
Sorry to hear this Aurora. You may want to learn about the large variety of different vaginas (which are all normal). “Gripping a single finger” sounds unrealistic.
Tara says
Oh, Aurora. You sound very young or just inexperienced. I would like to tell you, as an older woman (42yrs old/someone who loves fucking/older sister of 2/mother of 2/ soon to be ex-wife (he cheated)…if someone cheats it’s due to a lack of integrity. Nothing to do with you or anything else. It doesn’t matter what you did/didn’t do. He was already that type of person. A coward cheats hoping to get away with it. A real man says, “This isn’t working out anymore.” At the end of the day, the meanest thing you can do to someone is waste their time. Do you want to waste your time over someone who is mean? The small dick argument is the same as the loose vagina debate. Fuck one guy 100 times or 100 different men once; is there really any difference? Nope. How would anyone tell? They wouldn’t. And anyone caught up in those old wives tales is someone too uptight to have fun. Really and truly, there’s no such thing. All vaginas/dicks are different. Who’s to say what is normal? You’ve either found someone that likes the same things as you or you have not. If not, press on. No one should feel bad because of someone else’s unrealistic expectations. Sex is so much more than the final act… things like the initial anticipation, chemistry, foreplay. If you don’t experience those things, you won’t get to the climax or have any fun anyways. Have long vagina lips? Find someone who loves Arby’s. “Small” dick? Find someone who loves oral sex. Problem solved. Both women and men have unrealistic “norms”. If you’re busy trying to fit into them you’ll miss out on life.