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Have you ever heard the saying that men want a “lady in the streets and a freak in the sheets”? It seems like men want a freaky woman, and men who have those women are likely to brag about it! But if you don’t necessarily consider yourself a freak, the entire idea might be intimidating.
But if you can get over whatever’s holding you back, you might be surprised to learn how being a freak in bed can lead to better sex and a hotter relationship!
Orgasm troubles? If you are currently struggling to orgasm during sex or masturbation, then you may want to learn about the Easy Orgasm Solution. It will teach you how to have multiple vaginal and full body orgasms during sex and masturbation. It works even if you currently struggle to orgasm during sex or when masturbating. You can find out more here.
How to Be A Freak In Bed
As you can probably guess, there’s no single way how to be a freak in bed. Some people think anal sex is freaky, but you don’t necessarily need to be into anal to be a freak. In fact, it’s less about the specific acts and more about your attitude toward sexploration!
1. Be Open to Suggestion
Your man wants to have sex in the car or kitchen? He wants to add toys. Perhaps he suggested the two of you watch porn together. All of those things can seem pretty freaky if you’re a do-it-in-the-bedroom-before-bedtime person. However, being open to suggestion is the first step to being freaky in bed.
2. Enjoy Sex for Yourself
If you’re always down to try something new but only because your man wants to, neither of you will get as much out of sex as you can. It’s good to be willing and game, but if you’re not really enjoying sex, it can feel like it’s fake or all for show, and no one wants that.
So learn to enjoy sex for yourself. You might not like everything you try, but most women can usually find something to enjoy during sex whether it’s the joy of being looked at, clitoral stimulation, oral sex or fantasizing in their heads.
3. …And Make Your Own Suggestions
Don’t just leave it to him to spice things up or initiate sex. Take the reigns yourself! Let your man know some freaky sex ideas you’d like to try, even if it seems a little out there. Chances are, he’ll think it’s hot that you’re contributing and will love seeing you so turned on when you do try it.
If you want to give your man back-arching, toe-curling, screaming orgasms that will keep him sexually addicted to you, then you'll find them in my private and discreet newsletter. You'll also learn the 5 dangerous & "dumb" sex mistakes that turn him off and how to avoid them. Get it here.
Talking about sex can be difficult, so check out our guide to sexual communication to get it right.
5. Have Confidence
Everyone has hangups about their sexuality. Perhaps you’re worried that your tummy is too round or that you don’t sound “hot enough” during sex. Your man is probably worried about the size of his penis and whether he can keep it up, even if he’s never had complaints in that department.
So take a deep breath and recognize that your flaws are magnified only to you and that you’re desirable. If that’s not enough, learn how to get over sexual anxiety once and for all. Otherwise, you probably won’t be game to try new things, and you’ll never learn how to be a freak in bed.
6. Get Out of Your Routine
As we’ve mentioned, a routine isn’t exactly good for a freaky sex life. In fact, some people might consider routine the antithesis of freaky sex. There are no rules about how to get out of a routine. Just make sure you’re having sex at different times and different places.
Try a variety of positions. Chances are you’ll realize how often you have sex in the same way and at the same time, especially if you’ve been having sex with the same person for some time, as you try to break the routine. Sex probably starts in a predictable manner, too. Initiate sex in a different way than you always do, which leads us to our next point.
7. Initiate Sex
Men often complain that women never initiate sex. This makes them feel less desirable. You probably think your man is super sexy and are worried about how you look or feel, whether he wants sex and not embarrassing yourself. But once you get over all those things and initiate sex, your man will be surprised, and you’ll feel powerful.
Freaky Sex Ideas to Get You Started
If you’re open to being freaky in bed but aren’t exactly sure what to do, we have a couple of ideas for you.
1. Anal play
There are a bunch of options when it comes to butt play and being freaky in bed. You might think of anal sex right away (and you’ve got to read our tips for making the first time great), but you can try anal fingering with your partner or by yourself. Plus, rimming is a super freaky thing that some people like.
Quick Quiz: Do You Give Good Blow Jobs?
If you are new here, then you may want to take the quiz below to learn how good you are at giving oral sex and satisfying your man. You may discover you that you suck (pun intended) or that you are already a blow job queen.
2 Prostate play
If your man is freaky, too, then you’ve got to try this. He can learn how to become multiply orgasmic and experience more intense orgasms through prostate play. Discover six tips for giving an amazing prostate massage.
3. BDSM
BDSM stands for bondage, discipline, sadism and masochism. The umbrella term covers a lot, and we mean a lot, of activities that most people consider freaky! We’ve already talked about BDSM and all it entails several times on the Bad Girls Bible, so check out the following articles if you want to know more.
- BDSM for Beginners
- 6 Wild BDSM Games
- How Bondage Leads to Kinkier Sex
- 10 Femdom Ideas to Dominate Your Man
There’s always something new to try with BDSM if you really want to know how to be a freak in bed!
4. Role Playing
Role playing can be part of BDSM, but you can also try it without any bondage or domination games at all! Think of a hot role such as teacher or student. If you’re already becoming aroused, then you’re well on your way to being freaky in bed!
Related: 43 Sexy Role Play Ideas
5. Sex in Public
Many people who enjoy sex in public are at least a little freaky. There’s something about knowing others can (or could possibly) see or hear you that makes the sex so much hotter.
We do caution against doing anything that could get you arrested and definitely avoid areas where children are! If you’d like to try sex in public with less risk, discover how to have incredible sex outside.
6. Threesomes, Swinging and Group Sex
Not every relationship is ideal for adding people, but the right relationships can flourish by increasing the number of people in the bedroom! There are a few things you can consider:
- Swinging is when you swap partners. Learn more here.
- Group sex or orgies involve multiple people.
- Threesomes can be tricky to organize but can be well worth it. Use these 18 wonderful threesome positions.
Before you attempt any of these situations, you should have a strong relationship. Adding people is not a way to fix your relationship, and you should have a handle on any jealousy.
Read: How to Deal with Jealousy
7. Edging
Edging is a fun and freaky way to have better orgasms. It involves getting yourself or your partner to the brink of orgasm then backing off. You repeat this as long as you’d like (or can!) until you have one explosive orgasm.
If this sounds like something you’re into, read more about edging.
8. Phone/Cyber Sex
You might already be familiar with having sex over the phone or computer if you’re in a long-distance relationship. These activities help you to remain sexually intimate even when you can’t be physically intimate. But both of these activities are also great if you’re interested in being freaky in bed!
These two freaky sexy ideas make things hot. Even if you’re in the other room, you can send a steamy message for your man. Or you can leave a voicemail when he’s in the shower. Consider calling him up before you go to bed. Masturbating while he’s on the other end of the line is hot and can even help you sleep better. Adding video via webcam can feel incredibly intimate – and freaky!
Learn how to have steamy phone sex in this guide to get started.
9. Biting and Scratching
Biting and scratching are the tenets of rough sex. Leaving a mark can be so satisfying as can looking at a bruise or scratch on your own skin and remembering what you did (or had done to you!) to get it. Get 7 ideas for rough sex if you want to learn how to be a freak in bed.
10. Spanking
This item on our list of freaky sex ideas is often accompanied by other aspects of BDSM, but it certainly doesn’t have to be. If you’re willing to bare your ass and have it spanked (or to do some spanking yourself), then there are plenty of options to consider.
- Spanking is something most people have tried, and it requires no extra toys.
- Whips are single-tail sex toys that pack quite the punch.
- Floggers have multiple tails, come in a variety of materials and can be used at your preferred intensity level.
- Paddles may be leather or fur-covered and can even leave a design on your butt after use!
- Slappers are paddles with an extra layer that provides a secondary bite!
Learn more about erotic spanking. If you’re having trouble getting your man to spank you, try these 7 tricks to change his mind!
11. Talk Dirty
Dirty talking is something that makes many people feel anxious, but it can also really enhance the moment. Rest assured that you don’t need to scream “Call me a whore!” (unless you want to, of course).
Instead, you can work your way up by telling your man what feels good, what you’ve been thinking about and missing and what you’d like him to do to you or vice versa.
Now you’ve got plenty of ideas on how to be a freak in bed. Proceed with enthusiasm, but remember that you don’t need to do everything, every time you have sex. In fact, if you try to do it that way, it might seem like you’re completing a checklist rather than enjoying sex.
But if you explore your sexuality with confidence and creativity, both you and your man will benefit from the effort.
We also put together an in-depth list of 40 freaky things to do to your boyfriend if you are looking for more.
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You’re just simply the “Man” Sean lol ????????
I totally love you Sean,I check my mailbox everyday for you! Thank you so much
I have been reading your blog for a year now and it has helped me so much Sean but I do need help more on the subtle dirty talk. More on the Love aspect of intimacy.
If we women want to learn about men, the best thing to do is to get a male coach to train us and tell us how men think or feel and the other way around. So Sean you are the best coach ever in this matter. Sex is a vital issue cause relationship doesn’t last without good one and that’s reality. Thank you for opening up to us.
What if your man is the one not initiating sex and I am always. He is never in the mood. He us always too tired and put sex is so impersonal it turns me off. I know he is not cheating on me. I am a freak but he is so awkward in bed it makes me feel weird and my freshness can’t even come out.
Talk to him. The Sexual Communication Guide should help.
Just a curious question-
I am almost 47yo female having sex with a 64yo male. He is very experienced (lots of women) and he is only my 3rd (I was married to two of them).
This morning we were together- I stood next to the bed sideways, put my one leg that was next to the bed on the bed while standing on the other and bent across the bed with my upper half (not sure where I came up with that one but it happened that way)- and he told me it about blew his mind when he entered from behind, giving him a feeling he couldn’t describe but it was a feeling he felt once before so many years ago and all he could say was that in all the sex he has ever had or even that we have had in the last almost 4 years- that was the best mind blowing position he has ever had and begged me not to forget how we did it so we could do it again.
I’ve searched for this position online everywhere and can’t find it anywhere. I’m very curious to know what makes it so “mind blowing” for him that he just went on and on about it. Any help would be appreciated.
Sounds like you both found a fun position. Here’s the thing, everybody enjoys different positions differently. The key is to keep experimenting so that you find more satisfying positions like this one.
I’m definitely a lady & Big Freak. I reconnected w old friend. We’ve always had thing for eachother but never happened. He has same high sex drive. But now he’s in wheelchair & hasn’t had Sex in few years. I still think he’s Sexy I’m going to visit him soon & we’ve talked about his capabilities. And I’ll use some of your techniques & positions. But Is there Anything you can add that will make the experience better. 😉
The best thing you can add is talking to him to discover what he enjoys most
Hi there,
Iv been with my bf for 7 years now and we used to have a great sex life and still kind of do but I feel like I have no sex drive and he wants it everyday no exaggeration. He’s wanting to be more freaky and I’m going the opposite way and I’m not sure what to do? Sometimes I feel like it’s because he expects something from me so often I’m starting to feel uninterested or resent if that’s not to bold? Any tips to turn this around?
This is a tough one to give advice for as I don’t know your relationship as well as you do. However, it’s important to maintain good communication with your man about sex. This guide on sexual communication should help.
Find libido boosting items. I take a couple different things because I felt the same way. Now it’s amazing
I’ve been with my husband since I was a teenager I’m 44 now and he’s 47…… Before our sex life was great but we have been together for so long our sex life is getting less and less. I wanna have sex all the time but my husband will go for weeks without it. I always have to initiate first I always send him dirty text messages or videos. He says he enjoys the text messages and videos. My problem is I want him to be more
sexually active with me and get into roll play and I wanna wear sexy lingerie but he’s boring and doesn’t want to do anything like that. I love my husband and whenever we do hav sex it’s amazing, but I wanna more sex and more excitement.What do I do before I wonder to someone else to for full my sexual desires.
You need to talk. Great relationships need great communication. He needs to deeply understand your perspective and you need to understand his…when I say perspective, I’m talking about wants and needs too.
I’ve been single for 6 years, before that my ex and I hadn’t had sex for 3 years, I self pleasure often with toys etc and I’ve been asked out a lot Over the last few years but I’m terrified, the last time I was naked infront of someone for the first time was 14years ago, my self confidence is gutter level so I just can’t bring myself to date.
Any tips for a girl with low self esteem to get past this?
Here are my thoughts. Dating does not equal sex. Just because you’re on a date with someone doesn’t mean you have to get naked in front of them. You can take baby steps with what you are already comfortable with and then go from there. You’ll quickly realize that your date is probably just as nervous as you are.
Hi I met a guy a few months ago and he was going thru a divorce and I just had my fiancé pass away 1 1/2 yrs ago so we both said we didn’t want a relationship with no commitment attached so I’m am wondering When he says he wants me to be his freak and nobody elses. What does that really mean? Do you think he will want some kind of commitment later on? Help.
Honestly, you need to talk to him about this. You can be a freak with or without commitment.
I have been loving your website for almost a year now. I’m a 44yr old virgin and finally ready to have that sexual experience. I like learning new things and techniques, I like to try to be up on almost everything sex related. So I just wanted to say thanks so much for your expertise.
So I have with my hunter for three years now . And we tried a little of everything. Im 35 and he is 42 . We both have a awesome sex drive . But here lately he having a hard time getting off . But he can watch porn and get off by hisself . I feel like I’m not doing something right I’m at a lost . But his porn is alway threesome or two girls and one guy. I’m not into it at all .
I am in a long distance relationship and 6 hours difference time zone. We can’t have phone sex as often as we would like it so I left him a voice note while masturbating with dirty talk included. He loved it and I enjoyed!
The fact that he is watching a lot of porn is probably the problem. If you don’t want to do a threesome or things like that, then that’s fine and you shouldn’t be pressured into it, he needs to get back to reality and start enjoying great sex with you again. Ask him to give the porn a break for a week or two and I think you might both enjoy the results.
We’ve known each other for about 3 years, but not in a sexual way until a month ago. The first time was a little weird on his blowup bed. We had sex twice. The first time he was on top and ended up putting all of his weight on me. Very uncomfortable. The second time, we decided that doggy-style was the way to go on this bed of his. And it’s been that every time I went to see him. Can you suggest other blowup bed friendly positions?
Honestly, it’s a bit hard to say without knowing your heights, sizes and own personal preferences. My advice is to check out the Sex Positions Guide for ideas, try a bunch and keep using the ones you enjoy.
My 50 year passion for my first love began when we were 19. 40 years later, 3marriages, 3divorces etc, I called him out of the blue. He lives 2000 miles away so phone sex, sex texts and the occasional meet up are our only alone time. Turns out that the chemistry we had way back then, has NEVER disappeared. We are in our early 70’s, and when we talk and text, sex manages to wriggle into every conversation. We talk dirty, we share erotica and porn, we’re just starting with toys. Communication is absolutely essential. And we laugh all the time. Of course, it doesn’t hurt that he thinks I am the kind of woman every man would want in his bed. Loosen up. Ignore your body image. If he wants you, your weight won’t matter. I’m exceedingly lucky to have found him again and we are in love with each other. Our love affair gets better and closer, every single time we talk. Looking forward to “our next days away together”.