Cowgirl Sex Position

Cowgirl is probably the single most famous ‘girl on top’ sex position there is. Plus, it’s really easy to perform. Just check out the picture below. If you have never been ‘on top’ before, the cowgirl position is a great place to start. The great thing about cowgirl is that you are now the one in control which can be really fun if your man is usually the one on top and calling the shots.

cowgirl, sex position, bad girls bible

Like being on top and being in control? Then you’ll love Cowgirl!

Quick Note: If you want to learn my most powerful dirty talking phrases, tips & techniques, then you will learn a lot from this dirty talking tutorial video. Enjoy!

As I said, this is an incredibly easy position to have sex in. Your man just needs to simply lay on his back while you straddle him with your legs either side of his waist so that your knees are on the bed. You can put you hands on his chest, shoulders or the bed to steady yourself or alternatively you can just put them on your thighs.

What The Man Does In The Cowgirl Position

The man doesn’t actually need to do anything in the cowgirl position. But to be honest that’s not what sex is about! While the man is lying on his back, he can simply thrust up and down. Or he can slowly gyrate his hips in a swirling motion to stimulate the wall of your vagina. Or he can try doing both at the same time.

Your man can also put his hands under your bum and help to push you up and down if your are getting tired.

What The Girl Does In The Cowgirl Position

When you are in the cowgirl position you are really the one in control. You can bounce up and down on your man’s penis or instead, you can can move your body forwards and backwards to stimulate your clitoris and the rest of the outside of your vagina. Think of it as grinding against his pubic bone. Or you can try doing both at the same time.

You’ll also find that by leaning forwards or backwards you can change the angle of entry. If you find that you are leaning back a lot, then make sure to use your hands to help steady yourself.

cowgirl, sexual position, bad girls bible

Your man can help you to grind on him using his hands like in the picture above.

Things To Consider When Performing The Cowgirl Sex Position

Here are the main things I have observed both personally and from my students when performing the cowgirl:

  • A few girls feel quite self conscious when they first perform the cowgirl. DON’T WORRY. It’s perfectly natural to be a bit nervous the first few times you try it. To help take the pressure off, try doing it with the lights off. Alternatively, some girls find that leaning in on top of their man towards his face helps to take the pressure off while also being quite intimate at the same time.
  • You don’t have to be particularly flexible to perform the cowgirl. But if you are leaning backwards a lot, then it’s a good idea to be at least a little flexible.
  • Keep adjusting your position by moving your hips backwards and forwards as well as leaning your entire body either backwards or forwards until you find a position that you really enjoy.
  • Although your man may not enjoy it that much, a lot of girls I have talked to have said that they really enjoy ‘grinding’  to stimulate their clitoris in this position while their man is still inside them. Many have said that they much prefer this to just bouncing up and down on his cock.
  • Sometimes your man won’t get much out of this position. So be aware of this and make sure to change positions from the cowgirl to something that your man enjoys if he doesn’t seem to like it that much. Remember sex is about 2 people (or more!) having a great time. It’s never cool to be selfish during sex :)

Sean’s Thoughts On The Cowgirl Position

Personally, I really enjoy the cowgirl position. I find it fun seeing my girl on top. However I have noticed that sometimes I’ve been with a girl that doesn’t enjoy it too much which is perfectly normal (there are some positions that I don’t enjoy!). From talking to the girls I’ve been with that haven’t enjoyed the cowgirl position, I’ve found that it can be a multitude of reasons as to why they don’t like it.
It can be a confidence issue. It can be the fact that they like to feel submissive during sex and cowgirl isn’t a particularly submissive postion. It can be because they just don’t get much pleasure from cowgirl when compared to other positions.
If you enjoyed my tips in this article but want a true sex masterclass, then you may be interested in watching this blow job tutorial video where you'll learn my most powerful techniques & tips for giving your man incredible oral sex. Enjoy!

Free Bad Girls Bible Membership Access


    • says

      Hi Lonnie,

      The key here is to keep trying it. It could be his fault or it may be your fault. Perhaps he needs to take slightly shallower strokes? Or perhaps you need to try not moving up & down or back forth so much? Once you figure this out, then it will be all pleasure!


  1. Kay says

    I don’t feel much pleasure from this position, primarily because I feel more pressure/stimulation against my anus than anything remotely close to pleasure. Plus, this position is super tiring. I honestly don’t like Cowgirl at ALL.

  2. Jenni says

    Same problem as Lonnie. I’ve tried it for several times but his cock always slipped out or buckled. I think it’s because mostly his penis is not totally stiff. What do you think? I really want to learn it!

    • says

      Hi Jenni,

      I think I know what your problem is. You are probably lifting yourself up and down on him. This can make him slip out very frequently.

      Instead of moving up and down, try grinding on him, with him deep inside you the whole time.


  3. steve says

    I love it when my girl is on top. A combo of me having my hands all over her, and pulling her harder onto me adds to her movements for multiple orgasms. But,I have overly large stamina, and I have never been able to climax while on bottom. It is really bothering her because she feel she can’t get me off like I do to her when I am on top. As the guy, what can I do, or suggest happens, during cowgirl to help get me off and make my lady feel empowered?

    • says

      Hi Steve,

      This is perfectly normal, don’t worry and let your girlfriend know that it’s not such a big deal for you. One way to lose your stamina is to cut out any type of masturbation. This will change things in a week or 2. The other way is to try a girl on top position where you can really thrust in and out of here FAST like asian cowgirl. Let me know how you get on.


  4. Kittygurl says

    My partner has been asking me to get on top but really scare that I won’t pleasure him do you have any advice??

    • says

      Hi Kittygurl,
      Here’s the funny thing…sex should be about both of you having a great time. Sometimes you will be getting all the enjoyment, while other times it will be him getting most of the enjoyment, but most of the time you will both be enjoying yourselves. During cowgirl, you are in the perfect position to stimulate your clit against his pubic bone. The best way to achieve this is by grinding forwards and backwards on him, not by moving up and down. It may not provide him with a ton of pleasure, but you are guaranteed to enjoy it!

      So while obviously it’s important to please your partner, don’t forget about yourself!


  5. chelsie says

    One time with my ex boyfriend he told me that the only thing his ex was better at than me was being on top. Since then it has totally knocked my confidence, and although I still go on top to please my new partner, I’m constantly worrying that I’m not doing it right, although I have shared this with him and he says I’m amazing, I worry he’s just being nice. Also I struggle with ‘bouncing’ I don’t particularly like being in control of the up and down, and much prefer to grind, but unsure if it’s satisfying for my partner, if it’s normal etc. I still try despite all of this, and I am confident in everything else during sex, please just tell me this is normal and try to offer advice if you could?! Thanks Sean x

    • says

      Hi Chelsie,

      Compared to many of the problems couples have, yours really does seem quite minor. To be be perfectly honest and frank with you, the most important thing you can do is talk to your man about these things. He shouldn’t expect you to enjoy absolutely everything you try together. From what you describe, you should trust that your man is being honest when he says that it feels amazing with you on top.

      Lastly, if you are worried that you are not doing something right for your partner’s benefit and pleasure, ask them for some guidance. He may prefer a different angle or like he said, he may find it to be just right.


  6. Aileen says

    I can’t really get the “bouncing” part, maybe because I’m insecure of not doing it right and accidentally hurting him or also because I can’t even keep it going but I want my partner to enjoy it and I dont want him putting all the work and having all the control.

    • says

      Hi Aileen,
      If you don’t like the idea of bouncing on top of your man, then try grinding forwards and backwards on him instead. It’s great for lots of clitoral stimulation!


  7. Danyel says

    Hi Sean,

    So I know this post is a bit old but my boyfriend and I recently became active in bed and he is my first sexual partner. He keeps trying to push me on top but I resist in fear.. Does it make the girl unattractive? Can I apply too much pressure to his chest? He still kind of hurts me in bed, will this position help or make it harder? This page has helped so much and thank you but if you could answer these questions that would be awesome!

    • says

      Hi Danyel,

      Sometimes it can be a bit nerve-wrecking the first time you try out being on top. But once you try it out, you’ll realize it’s not such a biggie. Additionally, you will find that you have much more control when you’re on top, making it less likely that he’s going to hurt you.


  8. Caroline says


    I have recently started dating someone new and so far he has been on top throughout sex but I told him I would like to go on top as I have enjoyed that before. We tried the last time we slept together but I just couldn’t position our bodies so that he actually penetrated me. Have you got any idea how we can fix this? I sometimes had this problem with my ex too although we managed at other times.


    • says

      Hi Caroline,
      It comes down to experimentation…start trying out some of the sex positions from this list. You’ll like some, hate some and love others. The key is trying as many as possible and only keeping the ones that feel good.

  9. Morgan says

    I barely ever get on top because I’m not confident about it. Not about my body but how to actually have sex while being on top. I don’t want disappoint anyone but I end up disappointing them anyways by not getting on top. I don’t have rhythm of any sort so I feel I won’t be good at grinding or even the movements. Please help…..

    • says

      The key is small steps. Try simply lying on top of him and kissing him when you’re both in bed, without any penetration at all. Then once you are comfortable with that, try moving it up a notch using an easy to perform position like the Man Missionary.

  10. katly says

    i have a pretty good hip control when i ´m standing up and dancing for exempel and (heard it from a lot of people) but when i doing the cowgirl i find it harder to control and move my hips
    any tips?’ or is it just a confidence issue??

    • says

      You’ll get better with experience, an open mindset and a guy that helps you to feel confident. Also, make sure to do lots of experimentation with your movement to see what you find easiest and most enjoyable.

  11. 0ddone says

    Hi. I’d really like to get cowgirl down pact. My guy says he likes the up and down instead of back and forward except that feels a little awkward to me. I feel as I’m not pleasing him. Sometimes I’ve got it. But mostly I’m apologizing because I hav no clue what im doing. Help!

  12. Lambentlight says

    My boyfriend wants me to try and ride him but I tend to refuse because I’ve had some… Bad experience with my partners before him and they tended to just, drag me down ontop of them and it… Wasn’t a very good time, basically. But I definitely want to get over that fear and stuff, and I agreed I’d try sometime, but idk >< any tips for me to get over that nagging fear..?

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *