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Grinding On Your Man Sexually – Tips & Techniques

by Sean Jameson

This discreet newsletter will teach you how to make him cum hard, give freaky oral sex & make him scream your name in bed. Click here to get it.

You’re going to learn how to grind during foreplay and sex for maximum clitoral stimulation and intense sexual pleasure.

What Is Grinding?

As the name suggests, grinding is when you grind your body against your partner’s. Usually, this means rubbing your genitals/crotch against their body, but some people like other types of grinding, too!

Side note: If you are currently struggling to orgasm during sex or masturbation, then you may want to learn about the Easy Orgasm Solution. It will teach you how to have multiple vaginal and full body orgasms during sex and masturbation. It works even if you currently struggle to orgasm during sex or when masturbating. You can find out more here.

Why Grinding is such a great sex technique

Clit Stimulation – Grinding feels fantastic because It stimulates the vulva, and especially the clitoris (how to find the clit). Many people find that it’s more like their masturbation style than intercourse, and it increases their pleasure and the likelihood of having an orgasm.

Related: How to have intense clitoral & vaginal orgasms during sex.

Stimulate different areas of your vagina – During sex, you can also keep your partner’s penis at the same depth but use sexual grinding to stimulate different areas inside your vagina like the A Spot.

Many guys like it too – It’s not just for people with clitorises, either! Plenty of people with penises enjoy grinding on someone, so much so that it’s a type of dancing! Some people like to experiment with sexual grinding and anal penetration, too. It can also elevate prostate play.

A few other benefits of grinding include being able to do it while fully clothed, without mess, or the risk of pregnancy or STIs. And you might enjoy grinding if you have your period and don’t want to deal with the mess or if penetration would feel too uncomfortable for you. Of course, sex on your period can be good, too.

Squirting: Any woman can experience the life-changing pleasure of squirting, if you follow the right process. I demonstrate the most powerful squirting techniques and explain the process, step-by-step in the Squirting Magic Guide.

How to grind during penetrative sex

Grinding during penetration needs relatively simple hip movement. But you can experiment with different types of grinding to find what works best for you.

Back & forth – Grinding back and forth is an easy way to get started and see what you like. Back-and-forth grinding on top is sometimes referred to as “scooting.”

Read now: 18 satisfying woman on top sex positions.

Side to side – You can also try side-to-side grinding in bed if it feels good.

Circular motion – Circular grinding can also feel really good! Like back-and-forth grinding, it requires you to move your hips against your partner’s body (or an item you’re grinding). Don’t get too caught up about making a perfect circular motion though, just stay in the moment.

Other rhythmic motions – For other types of rhythm, you can combine back-and-forth and circular motions. Or you could pause with rhythm if that’s more your style.

Your partner does the grinding – Instead of you grinding, your partner can grind against you to create a sensation that feels good. This can work no matter who’s on top.

Grinding together – You can also try to grind together, although it can be tricky to sync up right.

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Pull them closer – Pulling your partner’s body closer with your hands can help you grind just right.

Lifting hips – In missionary position, if you are the partner on the bottom, you can lift your hips for better contact while grinding. Placing a pillow or sex wedge beneath your butt/hips can help keep them lifted.

Related: 9 sex wedge positions with demonstrations.

With a position pillow – You don’t just have to grind against your partner during penetrative sex. Using a position pillow is a great option, especially in positions like Doggy Style and many anal sex positions where you’re facing away. Some sex pillows even have pockets for vibrators or wands that you can grind against.

Using a “grinder” toy – Multiple companies make sex toys called grinders that are specifically designed for you to grind against. These are popular with some lesbian couples. Many of these grinders also vibrate for added pleasure. Plus, many can be used for solo time, as you’ll see below.

Related: 14 passionate lesbian sex positions to orgasm every time.

Against a cock ring – A cock ring with a larger design will be easier for you to grind against than a smaller cock ring–especially if your vulva is fleshier or your clitoris is further from your vaginal entrance.

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With other toys – Small vibrators that you can place between your bodies while having sex can also be used for grinding. Look for “lay on” vibrators, couples’ toys, or small bullets.

Learn: How to use a vibrator for strong orgasms.

Be Careful About Penis Positions

Grinding during sex can feel uncomfortable for your partner’s penis, especially if it causes it to bend awkwardly. Make sure everyone feels comfortable speaking up so you can adjust as needed.

Get: Advice for talking about sex.

Positions for grinding during sex

Several positions are especially good for grinding during sex.

Thigh Tide

Thigh tide sex position

Thigh Tide is the ideal sex position for grinding because it offers a lot of leverage when you grab your partner’s knee! You can even find grinding toys with straps or thigh harnesses if your partner lacks a penis but you like penetration (deep penetration tips). Some designs even have texture for grinding.

Go deeper: Thigh Tide sex position.

Coital Alignment Technique

The Coital Alignment Technique, or CAT, is a modification of the Missionary position where the penetrating partner, on top, moves their body forward. This allows the receiving partner, who is lying on their back, to grind their clitoris against their penetrating partner. The specific area that they will be grinding their clitoris against is called the mons pubis (the area above their penis).

Quick Warning: While this instructional video is quite distressing, it will teach you how to make your lover cry with orgasmic pleasure and become sexually addicted to you. If you are interested in having someone completely obsessed with you and only you, then check out the detailed (& explicit!) oral sex tutorial video here.

More: Coital Alignment Technique guide.

Cowgirl

Cowgirl works well for grinding, especially if you place a pillow underneath your penetrating partner’s butt or a toy between your bodies. Another trick is to have your partner place their hand flat against their mons pubis around the base of their penis (or dildo) so that you can grind against their knuckles. This sex technique is called the Vulcan.

More tips: Cowgirl sex position.

Drill

The Drill position can work for grinding, especially if you use your legs to pull your partner’s body close and/or lift yours up.

More pleasure: Drill sex position.

Jugghead

In this unique sex position, the penetrating partner’s upper body will be on the floor while they rest their legs on a piece of furniture. This lifts their hips in a way that can make grinding feel fantastic.

Discover: Jugghead sex position.

Quick Quiz: Do You Give Good Blow Jobs?

If you are new here, then you may want to take the quiz below to learn how good you are at giving oral sex and satisfying your man. You may discover you that you suck (pun intended) or that you are already a blow job queen.

Face to Face

Grinding can work in this position if you press your body close enough to your partner’s to make good contact. If it doesn’t work well or you don’t have furniture that’s the right height, switch things up and have your partner sit. Then, straddle their lap and grind away in Mastery position!

More: Face to Face sex position.

Lotus

Lotus Sex Position Illustration

Finally, we have a tricky position that doesn’t allow for much thrusting, which makes it perfect for grinding. Lotus is also an incredibly intimate position that allows you to share breath, which is an aspect of tantric sex.

Go deeper: Lotus sex position.

Check out the rest of our sex positions for more inspiration.

How to grind during sex

There are a bunch of other outercourse tips you can use to improve your grinding experience…

Against your partner’s leg

Grinding against your partner’s leg comes naturally for many people because of how easily a leg can fit between yours. This is often a major aspect of dry humping. In fact, some people consider humping and grinding to be the same thing!

Buy: Orgasmic Blow Job Techniques.

Or their penis

You can also grind against your partner’s penis, which can feel good to both of you. Experiment while your partner is hard and soft, and with varying states of clothing. If you’re humping while naked, adding lube can make things feel even better.

Don’t worry if grinding against your partner’s penis doesn’t do much for you. Not everybody is compatible like that!

Or their face

Another option for humping is your partner’s face. It’s best to make sure they’re okay with this first–and to take off glasses! Grinding against their face can be more aggressive than you mean to, especially when you’re (close to) cumming (how to cum). It’s possible you could hurt them, or they could struggle to breathe, and talking about it beforehand can help you both have a positive time.

Related: How to sit on your man’s face, with confidence.

You’re not limited to grinding against any specific body part, either. Some people find it pleasurable to hump their partner’s tailbone, butt, or even the inside of their wrist. As long as you’ve got a willing partner, the sky’s the limit when it comes to grinding on someone!

How to grind during masturbation

As many people discover, grinding can be a favorite form of masturbation. Here are a few ideas to get you started…

With a pillow

Many people discover their love for grinding by using a standard pillow because it works well. You may prefer a firmer pillow and can try a memory foam pillow or a sex position pillow specifically.

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Get: Tips for humping a pillow.

Against a towel or blanket

You can also use a pillow or blanket for grinding. Usually, this means balling it up so you can more easily hump it.

On the armrest of a couch

The armrest of a couch or chair can provide something to grind against, potentially while straddling it if it works with your body size and height. You could place a grinding pad on top of it to make it feel even better.

With a Toy

Many toys can be used for grinding when you’re playing solo, including wand massagers (with or without attachments) and clitoral vibes (try spherical or wider toys). You simply need to move your hips against the toy in a grinding motion or move the toy against your body to achieve a similar feeling. Just make sure to use enough lube to keep it comfortable.

More: What is lube and how to use it.

However, some toys are made specifically for grinding, and others make it much easier.

Bumpers are a sex toy that can be used with a strap-on and can also be placed in your hand or on another surface for grinding. Try a pillow with a pocket or slipping your bumper into your pillowcase to grind against, too! You may be able to combine it with syntribation!

Grinding pads often offer different textures and vibration with one or more humps for you to get humpin’. Some include insertable dildos or vibrators, while there’s at least one option that you place around your favorite dildo.

Dildos with highly textured bases might be perfect for grinding!

You’ll even find silicone grinding sleeves for your fingers if that’s your preferred way of getting clitoral stimulation.

After all that, you’re practically an expert on sexual grinding! Let us know in the comments if you try out our tips for yourself.

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It turns out that there is a simple solution for women who struggle to orgasm, whether you are having sex or masturbating.

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“I thought I was one of those women who couldn’t orgasm. I used to think I was ‘broken’ and ‘unfixable.’ This saved my sex life, and that saved my marriage.”

Even if you currently struggle to orgasm during sex or while masturbating, this process will also work for you.

And best of all, you don’t need to do anything weird or uncomfortable to start having the best orgasms and sex of your life.

June 11, 2025

About Sean Jameson

Sean is the editor of Bad Girls Bible and responsible for recruiting our team of sex and relationship experts. When he's not fastidiously checking for proper syntax or fixing bugs on the site, he's working with illustrators to make the Bad Girls Bible more beautiful and ensuring that our weekly email newsletter goes out on time.

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