9 Thrusting Techniques To Make Sex Orgasmic For Your Partner

These 10 tips will show you how to thrust during sex to bring your girl to orgasm quicker and more often. I start with the easy stuff and then move on to more advanced techniques.

1. Up and Down Thrusting

Up-and-down thrusting is the basic move when you’re completely vertical–lying down.

Up & down for men – If you have a penis or using a strap on, such as during pegging, this is a simple hip movement. Up and down.

Up & down for women – Receiving partners are more likely to thrust this way when on top, such as in Cowgirl or Reverse Cowgirl positions. The best way to do this is to squat over your partner with your feet flat on the bed or floor and use your leg muscles to raise and lower your body. It can help if your arms are long enough to place on the bed beside you or even grab the headboard in front of you.

This move takes a lot to master and it may never be possible if you’re particularly short, your partner’s penis is small, you have balance or mobility issues, or one or both of you has big bellies (12 best sex positions for overweight folks). That’s why so many women prefer to grind (plus, it feels great), which we’ll get to in a bit. However, you can try placing a pillow beneath your partner’s hips to raise them and make this type of thrusting easier.

2. Gliding

Whereas up-and-down thrusting is only vertical movement, gliding is a smoother, horizontal motion that you will do in any position where you’re not perfectly vertical. This includes Missionary because of how the vagina is situated.

Gliding for men – This position may also involve a bit of vertical movement at the beginning and end of each thrust. You might lift your hips slightly when moving forward, which pulls your butt in. Lifting your hips when moving backward will lift your butt, however.

You may be on your knees, feet, legs, or kneeling when gliding, so it requires lower-body stamina. The actual movement is focused in your hips. However, a strong core can also be helpful with gliding thrusts.

Gliding for women – Most thrusting that women do when on the bottom will actually be gliding as they lift their hips to meet their partner’s.

3. Grinding/Rocking

Grinding is the classic move that many women do when riding their partners. It’s pretty easy to do and it’s great for clitoral stimulation. In fact, one study found that 76% of women use a grinding or “rocking” technique to “make vaginal penetration more pleasurable” by rubbing against the base of a penis or toy that stays “inside the vagina rather than thrusting in and out” [1].

Grinding/rocking for women – If you’re in a position such as Cowgirl, your partner can place his fingers around the base of his penis for you to grind against them using the Vulcan V technique. Grinding also works well in the Thigh Tide sex position.

Because gliding doesn’t involve a lot of in-and-out movement, it can help the penis stay in place if it’s likely to fall out during thrusting.

Grinding can be forward and backward, side to side, or around. You can play with it to figure out what works well for you! One such trend is to spell the word “COCONUT” with your hips. Of course, it won’t be perfect, but it can help you visualize how to move your hips during sex.

Grinding/rocking for men – Although grinding is usually associated with women, men can do it, too. As previously mentioned, it can help minimize slipping out and feel great for both partners. Try it during Missionary or even a position like Jockey, Prone Bone or Rear Entry.

4. Thrusting Angle

Thrusting is about more than speed and power. The angle of your bodies and genitals makes a big difference, with the right angle feeling oh so good, perhaps making you feel more filled or stimulating your clitoris more.

On the other hand, the wrong angle can feel pokey. It may hurt and could even cause an injury. We don’t want any penile fractures here!

Change Positions

Your body, including height, build, and penis size, will impact angle, which is one reason why Missionary position might feel different between partners. You can change your angle in a number of ways, from completely changing positions (over 100 of the best sex positions with pictures) to adjusting your partner’s body. Consider how Missionary, Coital Alignment Technique and the Drill position are all rather similar but can feel different!

Make Small Adjustments

Consider how lying, sitting, kneeling, and standing might change the angle, too. For example, tall partners might want to kneel during Missionary to rest on their knees instead of their legs or feet. One partner standing next to the bed introduces a different angle than both being on it. Plus, you can use other furniture to assist with position to find the perfect angle.

Compromise

It’s pretty common for one partner to prefer a certain angle more than the other partner. As long as you can compromise, this doesn’t have to be a dealbreaker, especially if you need a certain angle to orgasm. But no partner’s desires should dominate sex if the other person isn’t enjoying themselves.

Speaking of domination: How to dominate your partner in bed during sex.

Leverage Tightness

Positions where the receiving partner’s legs are closer together, including Spooning, can also make penetration feel more fulfilling if their partner’s penis is a little smaller.

Go deeper: Best small penis sex positions and techniques.

This may mean you don’t have to thrust as deep, hard, or fast to have a serious impact.

Hit the Right Spot

Finally, some angles are better for specific stimulation. For example, Doggy Style is known for G-spot stimulation, while having your legs pinned back when you’re on your back, like in the Anvil position can help with deep stimulation, including the AFE (also known as the A Spot) or cervix.

5. Thrusting speed

Speed is an important factor in thrusting. It refers to how quickly you thrust. People often start with slow thrusting to warm up. Thrusting too quickly might be painful or even damage your tissues. The partner being penetrated is more likely to take damage such as micro-tears from friction.

Once you’re warmed up, you may naturally want to increase the speed. Typically, slower thrusting is associated with more intimate sex or lovemaking, while faster thrusting is associated with rougher sex. But for some couples, fast thrusting and rough sex can also be incredibly intimate.

You might have to thrust faster to orgasm. Or you may want to thrust more slowly if you want to avoid cumming too quickly.

Check out these tips for lasting longer in bed.

Keep in mind that many partners need consistency to orgasm, so you should not change anything if this is the case for your partner. Keep doing exactly what you’re doing. Unless, of course, you’re trying to control your partner’s orgasm by ruin their orgasm or edge them.

Related: What Is Edging & Why You Should Use It Tonight

Other than that, it can feel great to change things up, especially if you need to give your muscles a break. Communication and reading your partner’s body will help guide you.

6. Thrusting power

Aside from speed, you can also consider the power of your thrusts. This is all about how much force you put into the individual thrusts. They can be:

• Gentle thrusts that can feel more intimate
• Rough, hard thrusting, which is usually aggressive and intense
• Somewhere in between
• Varying between the extremes

Some people might struggle to separate thrusting and speed. For example, you might naturally find yourself thrusting powerfully whenever you pick up the pace. In some ways, this makes sense because you need a little speed for a powerful thrust. But you can separate speed and force to an extent if you consciously move.

7. Synchronized Thrusting

Synchronized thrusting can be great if you feel like you’re working together with your partner. It may also help you achieve deeper stimulation. Plus, one partner doesn’t have to do all the work!

How you synchronize your thrusting depends on the position.

• In Doggy Style, she pushes back while he thrusts
• In Missionary, she pushes her hips up and he glides forward for deep penetration and potentially clitoral stimulation
• In Cowgirl, she moves backward or forward as he thrusts from underneath

If you’re trying to get the hang of synchronized thrusting, you might start with the giver setting the pace and the receiver joining in. However, synchronized thrusting will be difficult if one or both of you lack rhythm.

8. Depth of Thrusting

Another consideration is how deep you thrust.

Let’s get one thing straight..

Deeper isn’t always better when it comes to thrusting.

Most nerve endings are within the first couple inches of the vagina, so deep thrusting isn’t always a requirement. A shallow thrust can hit the G Spot from the right angle (like in the G Spot sex position) or may leave you feeling disappointed or may even make it hard for your partner to keep their penis inside. Similarly, a deep thrust can feel filling and great if it stimulates the A spot… or painful, especially if it hits the cervix.

If you prefer shallower thrusts, a bulky cock ring or a type of toy, sometimes called a “bumper” or “stopper,” can help.

Like thrusting angle, the prefered depth is highly dependent on position. You might prefer shallow thrusting if you’re in a position where you’re bent at the stomach or waist or otherwise curled up, whereas deeper thrusting may be more comfortable if you’re stretched out. This has to do with how your organs, and especially your cervix, shift in each position.

Why Preferences Change During the Month

Your menstrual cycle might be particularly impactful here. The cervix tends to sit lower during your period, which may make it easier to accidentally bump with a toy or penis. Changes in cervical texture can also make any contact more painful.

On the other hand, the cervix tends to pull up and soften during ovulation, making it both a little harder to hit and less painful if it does.

Of course, you’re not limited to only shallow or deep thrusting. Variety is the spice of life, after all, and you can switch between the two. Some people especially love the “shallow, shallow, deep technique,” which is exactly as the name suggests!

9. Improving Thrusting During Sex

If you’re struggling to move your hips smoothly during sex, even if you understand the mechanics of how to thrust, you might need to work on your muscles.

As mentioned, thrusting can involve your core, butt (glutes), and thigh muscles, so you may want to work on some of those to increase your strength, flexibility and stamina.

You might be familiar with some thrusting techniques if you work out. The glute bridge is a type of thrusting intended to prevent you from overextending. Overextending can lead to back pain.

The glute bridge – Start by lying down flat on your back on the floor with your legs extended straight. Next, bend your knees to bring your feet to your butt and plant your feet solidly on the floor. They should not move from here

Then start to squeeze/tighten your butt and hamstring muscles so that it raises your butt and lower back. Keep squeezing these muscles until your entire lower back is raised from the floor and only your head/shoulders and feet are touching the floor. Finally, relax these muscles to come back to the starting position.

You can pair this workout technique with weights to build your muscles and improve your thrusting skills. Just make sure to do so safely!

10. Thrusting and Other Techniques

Thrusting is just one part of sex. Other movements, stimulation, and communication can all make your time between the sheets a wonderful memory… or a frustrating disappointment.

Here are some ideas for

• Eye contact – Look deep into your partner’s eyes as you thrust into them
• Dirty talk – Make your partner beg as you pull back or stay at the entrance to their vagina or ask them if they “Want this?” before thrusting. We’ve got all sorts of ideas for dirty talk.
• Bondage – Prevent someone from pulling you closer or pushing you away by tying them up in bondage–with prior consent, of course! Learn how to discuss consent in our guide to BDSM contracts.
• Domination/submission – Withhold the type of thrusting your partner wants as a type of punishment.
• Tantra – Create a cycle of thrusting and breathing. Learn how to have tantric sex.

Communicating your sexual wants and desires and creating a space where your partner can do the same is vital to having enjoyable sex.

For some people, some of the thrusting techniques or tips in this guide might miss the mark, and that’s perfectly okay! It’s more important that you have the sex that works for you and your partner rather than following every thrusting tip to the letter.

With these thrusting tips, you can improve your game in the bedroom. And now that you understand how to thrust during sex, you can even practice moving your hips beforehand to loosen them up and be more comfortable when the time comes.